AIBU - The Baby Bath Incident

You really think the whole world has access to overnight amazon deliveries?

My parents live in a town in Spain. Amazon deliveries have only just become a thing in the last few years and they take, on average, 7-14 days. The items available are a lot fewer than in the UK and always more expensive. The nearest shopping mall with a baby store is 40 minutes drive away.

While I think the OP is dramatic as fuck, I do believe that it is impossible to just buy a baby bath the same day if you're in a small town in the middle of nowhere.

I think this is for mil to sort.
The baby bath belongs to her so probably best just to stay out of it.
Meanwhile you will probably have to accept purchasing a new one, you are there for two weeks and will need to bath your baby.

The OP cannot make SIL produce the bath.

So she needs an alternative solution. Luckily, simple, cheap alternatives are available.

Don’t you have Amazon in Italy?

Because generally no one we know in real life would contact us from their holidays with a string of endless complaint about a non-event involving someone else’s baby bath and a complete inability to grasp that the solution is not to moan about her SIL but to bathe her baby in a different container or a sink.

If they did, I imagine lots of people would say ‘Get a grip, Angela’.

Agree with this.

Is SIL possibly jealous you have a new baby? Either way, she's being ridiculous. A 2 year old doesn't need a baby bath, and it's not SIL baby bath anyway.

Presumably MIL meant they could share it at her house, and didn't see the point having 2 when they weren't ever going to be using it at the same time? And she might not have enough money to buy enough for both to have one each.
With what you're going through, don't see why she shouldn't bring it, OP.

Honestly, if Mumsnet banned the use of pathetic clichés such as 'get a grip', 'you sound like hard work' and 'gently' or 'kindly' followed by an extremely unkind comment, loads of posters would be rendered mute.

I've never heard anyone say those things in real life.

DD is 12 and somehow managed to survive frequent sink baths without being infected or slipping across the kitchen

You could try keeping him a bit more upright. Sometimes reflux from the milk can set them off. Also peddling legs and so on.. also being in the baby sling helps a lot. It's such hard work, you have my sympathy. He can probably feel your tension too. Holidays are fun but they are also hard work too.

Warm baths will not make the blindest bit of difference. Colicky babies, ime, need dummies and lactose free milk.

I think you and dh are clearly sleep deprived and understandably tetchy but honestly let it go and as others have said sinks/washing up bowls are fine. Quick clean before and after.

SIL obviously have issues. Nothing you can do. I'd dettol the kitchen sink and then pop the wee lad in for a small soak. Roll a flannel or a t-shirt to pop under his head to make it more comfortable. I agree I wouldn't have wanted to do that for my baby early on but you've had the courage to go all the way to Italy..

Sibilings! Nothing like a random item to fight over to bring up all the childhood triggers.

I know of quite a few that have fallen out permanently over very petty things. It's sad but she's shown her true colours.

I'd rather have a good relationship with my brother than a baby bath...

The bath belongs to MIL. It was bought to be used at her house. SIL helped herself to it without asking when MIL was away. Now she won't give it back, even when MIL reminds her that it belongs to her (MIL).

I've no idea why most posters are saying that OP is being unreasonable.
If I was MIL I'd be locking all the baby equipment away next time I went away. SIL is a CF.

It’s exhausting reading these pathetic threads where there is an excuse for everything. Absolutely everything 🤣

So many people lack problem solving skills and it’s so embarrassing.

Blimey, the kid will be a teenager by the time the "baby bath" problem is solved. I get your frustration with SIL but you aren't gonna win this one. Just wash him in the sink, that's what we did years ago.

”The damn baby bath” 😂 do people actually speak like this?

Her brother rang up being ridiculous and started an argument over absolutely fucking nothing. She’s probably sick to the back teeth of the pair of them.

Won’t wash a baby where plates are washed but will eat off them.

Won’t wash a baby in a sink because water is more slippery there.

Thinks being slippery causes colic.

Can’t buy a washing up bowl because they don’t sell them in Italy 😂

Please 🙄

Absolutely agree.

We all know that the birth rate in Italy is zero because babies can't survive there! What is the OP thinking!

"I appreciate you've not long had a baby but you sound like incredibly hard work"

When you typed that, did you feel really pleased with yourself ? Embarrassing.

When my second baby was 8 weeks old I was second guessing all my decisions and crying a lot. If I had been the OP of this thread I would not ever have used Mumsnet again !

I found it hard. Glad I don’t have friends like you. I’m a very competent mother of 3, but I found bathing them tricky and they were so little and slippery.

@ExhaustedRaccoon get in the bath yourself and take the baby with you. He'll benefit both from the bath and the cuddle/skin to skin contact.

Try and do what you can to limit the impact of your anxiety and your DH's OCD on your children. They will pick up on this energy earlier than you think.

I can understand if she uses it every night as part of her routine, though i would probably have let you use it for a few nights. If it helps, my dd loved bathtime but it just fired her up for another round of manic activity 😄. Definitely wasn't calming before bedtime.

I think babies do also come from Italy sometimes

Your SIL is the one being ridiculous, and your MIL is being a total wet blanket.

It’s irrelevant whether people on MN think MIL shouldn’t have bought things for her own house for all the GC to share- she did, and the equipment should be there.

It’s irrelevant whether MNers bathed their own babies in the kitchen sink/ bathroom sink/ pond/ cattle trough/ dog bowl - the OP is perfectly reasonable to want to bath her baby in the baby bath which was bought for her children to use.

Why should everyone else be inconvenienced because SIL is throwing a possessive strop over something which isn’t hers and she doesn’t use?

Yes poor thing must be the only baby in Italy right now 🙄

PS I also agree she’s being a dick, and may well already have sold it/lent it to someone. In which case, take the excellent advice here and do what mothers have done for generations and use a sink! I hope your baby feels better soon.