my bf wants me and the children to move in with him

Nope nope nope

Another vote for do not give up your council tenancy. Had this happen years ago with a friend. Gave up council house to move in with a guy who promised her the world. It fell apart within 3 months and her and her kids ended up in a b&b while waiting for temp housing. The temp housing then turned out to be horrible. She had junkies in the next flat who broke in multiple times before she couldn’t take any more and fled back to her parents. They were in a different county tho so her kids had to move schools. It disrupted their whole lives

that was about 15 years ago and there are a lot less available council properties now. Get your name on the most for a bigger council house now, the wait could be years but don’t give up your council flat in the mean time

I don’t recommend it. If the house will be in his name, you will indeed find yourself homeless with children again if you split. You’ve already split once so you know there’s a distinct possibility you will again, it isn’t worth the risk.

Don’t give up your council flat! You shouldn’t consider moving in with this man because you need to keep your secure housing tenancy. If he’s going to be an amazing, supportive father, he will be able to do this while living separately.

Maybe find a private rental.

Oh god I remember you OP. It's just one bad decision after another and none of them are ever made in the interest of the kids.

Is your older son in education yet?

God no I implore you to stay put. it's only been a couple of months, after a rocky time. Kids don't care if the flat is small - they will be affected for life if you move them out with a man they barely know, then become homeless if the relationship goes south again.

Giving up a council tenancy for a private rental is insane advice

You'd be crazy to do this. You've only been back together a couple of months and leaving you during pregnancy is a massive betrayal (he didn't care??)

You need to wait much longer for him to prove his commitment before giving up something as precious as a council flat. If the relationship goes pear shaped again you'll be up the creek without a paddle.

DON'T DO IT
DON'T DO IT
JUST DON'T

None of that makes surrendering your council accomm. to live with this thoroughly dreadful man a good idea.
So what if it’s crowded and in other ways not ideal; at least it’s yours, and you are secure there.
Surely you can imagine what things might well be like six months from now if you moved into this man’s house. You’ll have some good reason for needing to move out caused by his terrible character (probably his having a baby with some other woman) and you’ll be in despair and facing homelessness.

While you are caring for all your children, including an infant, you can’t afford the luxury of mad ‘romantic’ risks. This bloke is not what any of you need in your lives.

If you fancy a bit of decorating, do up your own little place!

OP get your head out of the sand. If he didn’t want to be around you while pregnant with his child what on earth makes him an instant brilliant dad to other people’s kids?
JUST NO it’s going to be awful and your babies will suffer the most
be a responsible mother and keep your home

You're going to split up again, so no!

You will rightly feel like an idiot if he tells you all to leave and you are homeless. Again.

Well that would just be the most recent of many bad decisions.

@tiredbuttryin5 hi I know you want it to work out and all be happy ever after .
It really is too soon to tell , Infact you can never tell. I’d suggest keeping your flat and he can rent the house and you can spend long weekends and such there . You can still
help decorate either rooms and use the garden . I would keep your security for a lot longer . Personally I don’t think I would ever give it up .
Maybe in time when he has shown he can be trusted you can get married and then Jake a move in live together .
If you can make it through the baby / toddler years together then chat again . Give it a three year mark so chat again in 2years and see if marriage is on the cards.

You can always visit but it will be very unwise to give up your council flat and start from square one when he kicks you and your kids out.

It's way too soon to give up the security net of your flat. My DD has just got a bigger home from her HA, and it took 11 years.

DO NOT MOVE INTO PRIVATE RENTAL. You WILL become homeless again the moment he changes his mind, and even lower on the housing register.

I seem to remember from your previous posts that you have some unconfirmed learning disabilities. Have you asked any support workers to help you?

How is your son? What is he struggling with in school/college?

You're allowed to paint and decorate your own council house already.

@tiredbuttryin5 I don't want to be unkind, but your track record is very poor on making good decisions.
Your council flat may be too small but it's a secure roof over the head of your several children. Give that up and you stand a very good chance of being homeless again in the future.
You need to focus on the children you have and not what the latest baby daddy wants or what seems in theory to be a better prospect. It won't be.
And please don't have any more children unless and until you can provide properly for them.

Don't give up your security for a man, much less this one. Put the children first.

i have all boys so sharing isnt an issue to the council or just seems unfair and my elder 2 are constantly arguing because only one of them can game at once and their room is a small box room and i cant afford to rent privately on my own before people ask maybe in another area but im not moving extremely far away from everything they know

What do you think would happen if you two split up again?

Literally, where do you think you would live. You would have to take whatever was offered, even if it was far away from everything they know. Use a bit of common sense.

Don’t give up your social housing for a private rental, especially one in his name. Does he need your income/benefits to make it work financially for him?

I wouldn’t . Having the council tenancy gives you protection re housing. If you give it up move in with BF and it goes wrong you will be homeless and in all likelihood if you go back to the council you will be put in hostel / hotel accommodation. You won’t be a priority as they will see it as you made yourself intentionally homeless.

your track record with your partner isn’t great and there are no assurances he will not go back to how he was when you were pregnant. I know a bigger house sounds tempting but suspect it will be short term gain for a lot of future pain. How will parenting and house work / chores work with the kids that aren’t his ? Is he asking because you can help with the bills and effectively be his housekeeper ? It’s got potential to be a mine field.You can continue to be a couple with your existing arrangements.