To find this view re autism frustrating

I don't even know what to say to this as it's just so incredibly offensive and dismissive.

I can only speak for my son but he needs full assistance with every aspect of dsily life hes 16 but smilar to a
2 or 3 year old.

You find it dismissive because you classify everyone else as ‘neurotypical’ and without need.

As usual, context matters?

The only people I have ever heard, or read, using the words "gifts and superpower", were mums of SEND kids.

I can't really imagine going to tell them that it's not a superpower and they should stop using that term. People cope how they can.

No. Please don't make shit up and imply I'm stupid. I have never once said any such thing.

I find it dismissive because it completely ignores how much impact autism has on people's daily lives, even if they appear high-functioning and "normal." Of course neurotypical people can have problems too but they are not also dealing with a lifelong social communication and developmental disability on top of that.

It wasn't intended as either. I'm trying to understand.

Do you not want some of those to be classed as needing mh support? Some of the sensory suggestions i've made are because we implement them for my son. I won't subject him to a supermarket and do get shopping delivered, why would I take him to somewhere with loud noises knowing it would hurt/ upset him. Surely that's common sense.

I'd invite the people who think it's a gift or super power to come and spend a day with my family. DD2 has autism she is incredibly gifted where art is concerned and always had incredible knowledge on many subjects as she never stops reading but she is crippled by anxiety, doesn't understand many social cues or behaviour, doesn't understand jokes or sarcasm and has recently been diagnosed with FND which is more common if you have autism.
Or they can spend the day with my non verbal 6 year old who has the development of a 12 month old and start the day by washing the poo if him and cleaning the poo if his bedroom floor, walls, window, door, etc because he's still in nappies but takes them off and smears at night.
I love my children and generally they are pretty happy, especially DS but I don't see their disability as a gift. I'm just interested, do people who think those with autism have a gift feel the same about wheelchair users?

But we don't need mental health support

I have seen lots of memes on social media posting about how its a super power
Also the other very irritating
" its not a disabillity its a different ability "
In fact i have seen posters on here talking about people being differently abled .

It's not about not wanting things to be classed as MH support, it's about the fact that your entire post appears to dismiss how much impact living with a disability can have on people.

You talk about not subjecting your DS to a supermarket but at some point he's going to grow up and be an adult who has to, at some point, go somewhere like a supermarket. The same applies to going to noisy places. For example, I had to go and get my car fixed recently which meant I had to be able to navigate a noisy garage with lots of people talking all at once and lots of smells that I didn't like. I was so overwhelmed I genuinely almost fainted. I was SO embarrassed but what choice did I have? I had to get my car fixed so I could do my job.

Or what if your DS never learns to drive and needs to cope with noisy public transport to get to his job?

It's impossible to live your life without ever exposing yourself to things you don't like, and unfortunately when you live with a disability, you sometimes need support to be able to do that.

What support is that you have need that isn't mh or sensory? I really am trying to understand. Much of what the pp listed I would think does come under mh needs? I know this wasn't you but that is the example of support given.

We need the support because we are disabled. Not because we struggle with our mental health. I was fobbed off with poor mental health for YEARS before my diagnosis and it really pees me off. I am not depressed or anxious. I have developmental and communication disability. They are not the same thing.

Well no my ds won't. He has to have 2:1 support to go out and it would be a safeguarding failure for his carers to take him to somewhere like a supermarket as it is documented in his care plan that he shouldn't go.

He won't ever learn to drive, the suggestion is laughable. He will likely have high rate of mobility for as long as PIP is around so no public transport. He's also given sedatives for flying.

What he is exposed to isn't in his hands; where he goes and what he does is decided for him. He isn't taken anywhere new without the environment/ activity being risk assessed first and if something doesn't work for him, we leave.

But you are quite able to communicate, most of the support you detailed was for mh type needs and sensory needs?

I'm not denying you have a disability what i'm askes is how that impacts you and what you came back with was anxiety, stress, burnout and sensory needs.

I think she’s got it bang on. working in schools for the last X number of years ive seen what constitutes autism completely and utterly change

But I don't qualify for any of that support so what do you think my options are, exactly?

You clearly managed without it you didn’t enjoy it, but you managed. So, you don’t need the extra financial boost.

Although DS can talk his communication needs are massive and he can actually only communicate with a very limited amount of people at all. He will never live independently and at 16 still needs a massive amount of support with every aspect of life. He had 1-1 throughout school and will have at college even though he is going into a specialist program. He can’t safely be left for even short amount of times.

he still has diagnosed mental health needs severe enough for him to have been on antidepressants since he was 9. He has the added issue that he struggles to access any support and that will get even harder when he turns 18 as the team that have supported him since he was 7 at CAMHs he will age out of so we will have to start again.

Being able to communicate via a screen is not the same as being able to communicate in real life. If you were having this discussion with me in person I would probably have already gone into verbal shutdown.

I don't think you're really interested in how it impacts me because every time I answer you, you tell me I need MH support. I don't. My mental health is absolutely fine. I need support with my disability. They are two completely different things.

I never said I did need it. Nor do I want it.

Exactly. It's so fucking dismissive to be told "oh, it's your mental health". Like I can just be given some pills and sent away.

I am genuinely interested. I also don't want to upset you any further so please don't reply to me any further if it is.

Similar to my son he does go shopping because he likes it
He likes to sneak stuff into the trolley😂
But we dont tske him to places he cant cope with
He wont ever be able to drive , work , live indepentley
He will need full time care for the rest of his life.

I think ‘doubly exceptional’ is the term used for those with autism and extreme intelligence isn’t it? Because it acknowledges their IQ/ability but also their disability.

I'm not upset, I'm frustrated that when I say I don't have MH issues, people still insist on trying to tell me that I do.

I've spent years going back and forth to the doctor because I was misdiagnosed with mental health issues and fobbed off with medication and various "adjustments" that made absolutely no difference because my mental health has never been the problem.