To think my age gap / sugar baby relationship is nobody else’s business?

Also, you might want to keep a toe in at work. Not to be mean but one day you might find yourself unable to find a sugar daddy/rich partner to fund your lifestyle and need to return to work, which gets trickier as you get older even with experience. I'm not sure how you could explain gaps on your cv without lying massively

You're shallow, materialistic and prefer money over love, so you've become a prostitute with one client. That's your choice, but you can't expect people not to judge you for it, and I'm not surprised that his children aren't happy.

I'm sorry but you're talking about high class escorts here and not sugar babies.
Young, sexually attractive, pleasant and willing - that's all that's required for the role of sugar baby.

Exactly that. What decent man with the kind of income you’d deem suitable is going to want to marry you and have children with this in your past @spicysugarbb?

Many people will never meet the love of their lives, and so many settle anyway.

You only attract judgement when you settle for someone wealthy. If you were into a transactional relation with someone near minimum wage, because you can't afford a flat on your own or whatever reason, no one would judge you.

So I believe most judgements are very hypocritical, and there must be a reason why they are so bitter against you.

I find it very cold to have a relationship with someone you don't really like, it's very superficial but it hurts no one but you.

I have a friend like you. She’s in her 50s now and has recently been dumped by the latest cash cow. Oddly she’s not finding it as easy to bag another easy wallet as she did when she was younger. She is independently penniless. Be careful about the life you build for yourself and the basket you put all your eggs into. You have a shelf life.

She's not even 'getting money' is she? Her life expenses are covered and she gets taken on holidays and has an 'allowance' but it's not like she's amassing any serious capital. Plus, she gave up her high paying job so the longer she is idle the harder it will be to get back into an increasingly tough job market. Plus, they're not married so the minute he dumps her she has no rights to anything of his.

Daft arrangement. If true.

I suspect it’s real and nearly went there myself, but I was in a relationship with him, it was genuine, it happened organically. but then he offered me a credit card, tried to get me to quit my job and wanted to provide me with housing.

i did care about him and i was in love, but I did keep working, and as soon as the first offer came in, I knew it was going somewhere it shouldn’t. I told him it would look wrong, people would think I was a trophy, just with him for money. Him with me due to my age, And I couldn’t stomach the shame of it.

It was phrased very well when he offered, he was supporting me, loving me.efne offered me worked in one of his companies if I’d quit mine. Multiple different jobs. but I didn’t want it, it was prostitution at its core, andI ended it, which hurt a lot. I then met my husband who is my age, and we are married, child and been together decades.

if I’d done it, I’d have been controlled by him. As fully reliant, I’d have been seen as what I had become, a whore, and as much as I do think he was in love with me. I just couldn’t bring myself to be paid for like that.

if he’d not tried to exert financial control it would likely have lasted a bit longer till I came to my senses. But he did. And so I was out.

I'm wondering what's wrong with you that has prevented you finding an ultra wealthy man your own age before now? Many of us married to men like this met them at university.

It's nobody's business, but it IS business. People will be judgy.

If you were into a transactional relation with someone near minimum wage, because you can't afford a flat on your own or whatever reason, no one would judge you.

er that’s not true. Lots of people would judge someone who chose to be in a relationship just so they could afford a flat!

OP, I celebrated my silver wedding last month. Our young adult kids took us out for dinner. It was just lovely.

Yes, it was a struggle juggling work and parenthood, I don’t have diamond jewellery and we flew economy. But I have a career I am proud of, and a close relationship with my husband and children that is priceless.

Have a proper think about what you are sacrificing in the future by living your life as it is perhaps, not just what you are gaining. If you are still happy, then go for it. Just make sure you don’t have any regrets, that’s all.

Yes I agree. I don’t think that YABU but do save and plan ahead for when you have nothing.

This. ^

Harsh, but true.

I personally couldn’t do it as I feel like I am too much self respect to go for a man for financial reasons.

However, lots of women, especially on MN, are with their DH’s for financial reasons.
It’s just not seen as anything untoward because they’re a similar age.

I don’t think it’s anyone business, as it’s whatever makes you happy.

However! My mum is currently in an emotionally and financially abusive relationship and I do feel it is my business.
I’m guessing his kids feel similar to me, that you are abusing him and taking advantage of him.

How many lonely women give their money to toy boys in other countries, because they are preyed upon and scammed - is it still no one else’s business.

When does it become taking advantage of a vulnerable person.

What does concern me is you want kids.
My aunty was similar to you. They had the kids but then the much older man got dementia, lost his job and wealth and she is now his carer and is looking after the kids all on her own.
He will eventually go into a care home but then she’ll lose even more money.

What you do, is completely up to you but I don’t know if you would make a good mum.
Have you thought about how the kids will grow up embarrassed about the age of their father - if he even lives long enough for them to start school.

Have fun now but perhaps rethink the kids.

Yeah, famously, no one ever comments on people in relationships that enable a council flat.

Bit of a brag thread then

There is nothing bragging about being a prostitute and giving your younger years to a man who pays for access to your company and body. When fooling yourself into thinking he or another man will have babies with you.

It’s nobody else’s business but you’re obviously going to be judged. You don’t get to dictate what other people are allowed to think. You are essentially a prostitute, as is anyone else who is in this kind of arrangement in exchange for money.

If you’re fine with that then crack on, but I don’t really get what you’re asking.

How is he old enough to be her grandad?

She's almost 30 and he's in his early 60's. Not many boys of 15 or 16 having grandchildren.

It’s nobody else’s business as you both know the score but you can’t blame people for being shocked and seeing it like prostitution. Don’t tell people if their judgement annoys you.

Woof woof

If I were his kids I'd have a lower opinion of him than her. The thought of my dad doing what he's doing 🤢...I couldn't look him in the face!
But I don't really blame you. I don't think you're after his inheritance, so you're doing nothing wrong. Just enjoying the here and now. He's chosen to spend his money on you in this way. Enjoy it, while it lasts!

He gives you a monthly allowance? very dodgy.