Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

By way of illustration, a female acquaintance whom I have known since university was a big one for this. She's straight and probably of average attractiveness. While at university she'd frequently remark on the absence of men she found attractiv

117 replies

Nearenough · 03/07/2026 15:21

To think cross gender collective punishment is a thing.

OP posts:
CallMeDaphne · 03/07/2026 16:16

ComtesseDeSpair · 03/07/2026 15:23

That would be an ecumenical matter.

Careful now.

Down with that sort of thing

LT1233 · 03/07/2026 16:14

ThatCyanCat · 03/07/2026 16:05

And I've checked the moon phase. It's not full, it's waning gibbous.

Mercury retrograde period. Everyone I know has gone a bit extra tbh

FadedRed · 03/07/2026 16:13

SummerHasArrivedatLast · 03/07/2026 15:33

If the weather forecast had been more accurate before I hung the washing out, I would have known it was going to piss with rain this afternoon and I would have put the towels and bed linen in the tumble dryer.

Now, I will have to load the washing machine tonight and hang the washing out again tomorrow morning before I go to work.

Hopefully, tomorrow we'll get the sunny spells and light breeze the Met Office promised for today...

Oh I feel for you, Summer, it’s been lovely here and I got two loads dry in no time! 💐

radiatordrama · 03/07/2026 16:11

I'm truly shocked that MN allows such long subject lines.

QueenCamillaMW · 03/07/2026 16:10

Rockgrin · 03/07/2026 15:29

I hear you're a racist now, OP?

Should we all be racist now?

What's the official line the church is taking?

Only the farm keeps me busy and in the evening I just like to have a cup of tea.

ZorbaTheHoarder · 03/07/2026 16:09

You, OP, are causing several people to have snapped and farted!

But seriously, for a moment, what on earth are you on about?

LuckyHazelFox · 03/07/2026 16:08

Darragon · 03/07/2026 15:25

Were you trying to ask Alexa something?

😆 🤣

ThatCyanCat · 03/07/2026 16:07

NeverDropYourMooncup · 03/07/2026 15:53

Nah, that one clearly had a cunning plan.

This one, well - OP, have you ever thought of writing some war poetry?

There are just so bloody many pompous, rambling men on here he could be! Unless it's just one guy who keeps name changing, but you often see more than one on the same thread.

pinkyredrose · 03/07/2026 16:07

Go and hand a cuppa and a lie down.

5128gap · 03/07/2026 16:07

So. You think your mate has been judged on her appearance, and judges men on theirs.
And you are asking if the second is her revenge/learned response/sauce for the gander defiance for the first?
And are suggesting that if so, it is unfair because the unattractive guys she's commenting on may not have been the ones who judged her and other women?
Is that it?

ThatCyanCat · 03/07/2026 16:05

ElBandito · 03/07/2026 16:00

I've been outside and checked, the sun is indeed over the yardarm.

And I've checked the moon phase. It's not full, it's waning gibbous.

CamilleBeauchamp · 03/07/2026 16:04

What the hell are you doing in the bathroom day and night? Why don't you get out of there and give someone else a chance?

TooLongDidntRead · 03/07/2026 16:02

Nearenough · 03/07/2026 15:29

The subject line and text seem to have got mixed up. In addition to what is above, my feeling is that sometimes those who havee felt negarively judged on their own attractiveness like to make vocal judgments about others. It is as if being in the judge's chair means you cannot be the one being judged.

A (possibly); related phenomenon is the summer slew of opinion pieces by female journalists bemoaning the appearance in public of very white British and Irish male limbs. Is this an attempt, conscious or otherwise, to rebalance the scales of attractiveness judging? What seems to be clear is that the people who are appearance-shamed are often not the exact same group of people doing the original negative appearance judging, which is what causes the appearance of collective punishment.

No.

MaryBeardsShoes · 03/07/2026 16:01

You sound like my mother aka I have no earthly clue what you’re on about!

Tillow4ever · 03/07/2026 16:01

I’ve never taken drugs in my life… but I’m sat here wondering if I’m high trying to make sense of the OP.

I bet he’s short as well as ugly.

MeanwhileinGilead · 03/07/2026 16:01

Are you maybe mixing up public policy with personal preferences, a la "Brexit was inevitable because everyone moves out of the share house eventually" or "there's no need for sex-specific facilities because men use the loo at your house"? It's not a "punishment" to find someone (or even everyone) unattractive, and not an obligation to refrain from saying so if you do (although on a personal level it may be basic manners).

I'm also not sure it's inherently cross-gender; if your uni acquaintance had been a lesbian she'd likely have been complaining about the lack of attractive (to her) women.

Cuppachuchu · 03/07/2026 16:01

We're going to need more wine.....🍷

ElBandito · 03/07/2026 16:00

I've been outside and checked, the sun is indeed over the yardarm.

tartyflette · 03/07/2026 15:56

Life’s too short to be arsed with this bollocks.
(Picky bits is actually two words, even if hyphenated, and is a horrible phrase anyway. )

JWhipple · 03/07/2026 15:55

Jellylasagnafortwo · 03/07/2026 15:27

Was It Sharon that didn’t get the M and S job?

No, you're thinking of Sharon who was a wellness coach. Not Sharon who coached wells. It's easy to get them mixed up though.

TidyMaid · 03/07/2026 15:54

Getting this one to 1,000 posts will be a struggle.

NeverDropYourMooncup · 03/07/2026 15:53

ThatCyanCat · 03/07/2026 15:48

I wonder if this is the guy who was mansplaining Edmund Blackadder to us all the other day. I usually try to avoid that term but fuck me, if ever a man asked for it...

Nah, that one clearly had a cunning plan.

This one, well - OP, have you ever thought of writing some war poetry?

BitOutOfPractice · 03/07/2026 15:51

I’m near enough unsure.

I am, however, applauding the creative use of the semi colon. We don’t see enough of it in this day and age

ALovelyPinkUnicorn · 03/07/2026 15:51

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 03/07/2026 15:29

No, Sharon had an issue with a wasp and if I remember correctly her boyfriend was t-rexing in the supermarket.
That takes me back.

The t-rexing in the supermarket… works every time!

legally blonde bend and snap GIF
Swipe left for the next trending thread