AIBU or is this not 100% my fault? *Warning - involves sex and a bit graphic /gross*

She has said multiple times that they do NOT have this kind of sex and actually agree it is not their thing. So, I'm trying not to be too blunt, but why don't you fuck off with your assault apologist bullshit.

That's called gaslighting. This is just the start. I think you'll end up going from one abusive situation to another, if you don't leave him -now-. You can prevent this from going any further. Please don't stay with someone like that, because this is the first warning sign.

I've read this differently to most others on here. 2 pissed people having sex, one went too far momentarily. If he'd done the right thing- apologised, promised to never do it again, make sure you were ok, I'd be inclined to chalk it up to experience and let it go.
The reaction you got from him on the other hand would have me running for the hills. He's doubled down and blamed you for what at best could be described as an accident, unless you feel like it should be described as worse. I couldn't let that go as it shows how he'd behave in future. The relationship is fairly young, as are you. Get out now and meet someone who values you.
BTW different circumstances but I once accidentally threw up on DH years ago. He was shocked and horrified but saw the funny side. He never made me feel bad for it even though I was mortified. We still laugh about it occasionally.

Serves him fucking right.

Jesus christ OP, he's an utterly vile pig.

Please please block him.
If you were my daughter I would be devastated for you.

He is a nasty abusive pig.

I too think he assaulted you. Vile pig.

Edited - op there is no harm in going to the police and reporting if you expect them not to press charges. If you just want a formal record somewhere and for him to know it’s wrong, obviously report. I just want to manage your expectations going in xx

This is because less than 1% of rape and sexual assaults go anywhere. It’s her word against his. He’ll deny it. It will go nowhere.

rape is pretty much legal now as long as you don’t use force. It’s awful.

What a dick.
Once i had too much to drink and me and my partner started playing around.. I also gave him oral but went too far down and threw up. Was it pleasant? Nope. Was it nice for him? Probably not. But he didnt make a big thing of thing. I felt horrible throwing up and apologised and he told me it was fine. We both went to get cleaned up and didnt continue anything else after that...we cuddled afterwards and that was that.

He is being a dick, 100%. What exactly are you being unreasonable about?? He pushed you down, you naturally gagged and then threw up. I get it probably wasnt nice being for him (or you!!) but going on about it like a child. Making you feel bad?? Making you beg for a cuddle?? Nah that's abusive.

Throw this one back in and do not look back.

‘Op I would say police but they’ll do nothing’

Yes I said that, I also said what I said in the post you’re responding too. I haven’t said I agree with his actions have I? I don’t think infantalise him is what I’m doing at all, you’ve got the wrong word there.

Well luckily the law does so your opinion doesn’t matter

Op I would say police but they’ll do nothing. I’m so sorry this happened to you. It wasn’t your fault. He deserved you biting it off in shock not just vomiting. Please make sure you are surrounded by loving supportive people and dump his arse

If you’re gagging you aren’t not breathing. Yes it’s not pleasant obviously as OP was sick but I wouldn’t define it as assault others would.

You said he got carried away???????? Like seriously???? Oh that makes it ok then. Jc way to minimise a serious sexual assault and blame the victim. He knows right from wrong. He would go mad if she shoved something down his throat. Don’t infantalise him fgs

I would actually say this to him - actually you forced my head down hard triggering my gag reflex and I was unable to breathe and I’m the one who you think should apologise - you have issues but luckily I don’t have to deal with them as you are finished with - how dare you tell me to apologise when you caused it. That it is an assault - you assaulted me!

As I said in my other posts OP has nothing to apologise for and the fact he didn’t apologise tells her everything she needs to know about him

This

It could be 'porn culture' I suppose fuelling an increase in these threads, iyswim, but it does seem a bit of a sudden influx of these types of threads on AIBU, I agree. MNHQ might think it better to move them to the Sex board or Relationships, though.

He assaulted you and called you gross for having an involuntary reaction lmao what a dickhead you should leave him and tell him its because his midsection is too fat and you found a younger fitter guy

He stimulated your gag reflex and you gagged. He was too forceful. Not your fault, he should apologise.

He didn’t get “carried away” - he removed her ability to breathe by choking her with his dick, causing her to vomit as a result. That is not what she consented to and minimising it as “carried away” isn’t on.

If he'd thought with his brain, instead of his penis, he'd have known doing that to someone drunk was a stupid idea. He's watched too much porn Op, he thinks ramming it down your throat is normal. Stop saying sorry and say goodbye instead

Did you post the other thread (it reads the exact same with minor details changed)?

Dump, due to you having to apologise to him and not the other way

He is not an idiot. He knows about the gag reflex. She didn’t consent to this. He should be the one apologising not her.

She didn't consent to him choking her did she? You're completely wrong about that.