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The driveway drama continues. Neighbours are still driving me insane. What should I do now?

336 replies

9champions · 16/02/2026 11:14

I’m not sure if anyone remembers my last thread, but to save me from explaining the background, I’ll link it here - https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5482826-neighbour-using-my-drive-landlord-wont-help-what-can-i-do?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share

I’m not really looking for opinions on that since we’ve already discussed it. However, I’d like to hear your thoughts on what’s happened since then and what I should do next.

After chatting with the neighbour and her outright refusing to stop, I decided to put up my own fence for some privacy and to stop her from using my driveway. I considered putting down planters, boulders, etc. (which I’ll get to in a minute), but I figured a fence would be a better option since it’s sturdier. It’s not ideal because my driveway is pretty narrow, and the extra cost is frustrating, but their fence is right on the boundary line anyway, so hopefully, it won’t make a big difference, and I’ll still have enough space to get in and out of my car.

I’ve been trying to get someone to come over and give me a quote for the last few weeks, but I’ve been let down a couple of times. Finally, someone is coming this week to have a look. Now, about the planters. I’ve been parking my car there as usual, but somehow she’s still managed to squeeze past. I wanted to put something there while I was away this weekend until the fence was up, so I placed 2 long thin planters there (on my land, not hers). I got home yesterday, and there was a knock on the door. It was her saying she ran over the planters and broke them, offering to pay for a new one, etc. I said no (they were £2.50, so I’m not going to bother asking for that), but isn’t this just ridiculous? The planters were on my drive, so the only reason she hit them was because she drove over my property. She tried to claim she clipped them with her back wheel, but that wouldn’t have happened if she wasn’t cutting across the drive in the first place. It was honestly like something out of a comedy sketch.

I’d be more sympathetic if this was their only choice, but it’s not. They could:

Take down their fence so he can park the van there instead and put the car on the street to create more space.

Talk to the landlord again about the fence.

Talk to their neighbours and ask them to leave more room on the road for the van.

Move the van when she needs to go out or come back home.

They’re opting for the easiest, most convenient solution, even if it means damaging someone else's property. It just reaches a point where it becomes bone idle.

So what should I do now? Continue with the fence and hope she doesn’t crash into it or damage it? I can let the planter go, but not a fence. I’ve already asked her nicely, and she made excuses. I’ve put obstacles in her way, and she’s just driven over them. So what else can I do? Should I really have to go through all this trouble to stop someone from using my property?

What’s even more confusing is that she says she can’t get out of her car on the side of the fence because there isn’t enough space, so she has to pull onto the driveway instead of reversing and driving off in a straight line. But her partner was in the passenger seat yesterday and got out on that side just fine, so there’s clearly enough room. I think she’s just a bad / lazy driver and doesn’t want to reverse on.

Before anyone says it’s not causing any damage, I don’t care. It’s my property, and I don’t want them using it. If it was now and again, that would be different, but not every day, multiple times a day. They've been dicks and unhelpful in the past, so no, I don't feel like helping them out either.

Neighbour using my drive, landlord won’t help. What can I do? | Mumsnet

I’ve lived in my house for almost 4 years now, and I had a new drive put in last year, which cost a fair bit. Parking on my street isn’t great anyway,...

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/5482826-neighbour-using-my-drive-landlord-wont-help-what-can-i-do?utm_campaign=thread&utm_medium=app_share

OP posts:
Thread gallery
13
SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 16/02/2026 13:47

ReadingSoManyThreads · 16/02/2026 13:41

Wear and tear on driveways, particularly with the neighbour dry steering on it as she does, causes a lot of damage which is very costly to fix.

Less than fences, planters etc.

MissPobjoysPonies · 16/02/2026 13:46

Can you put in a chain link fence to the boundary line? Just as a started, metal posts concreted in but narrow? I know painful but I can see how this would be more than irritating.

SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 16/02/2026 13:46

9champions · 16/02/2026 13:42

Cheaper, easier, and less stressful, for who?

Anyway, I've made up my mind and I'm not going to change how I feel about this. I don’t want them using my property, and I have every right to say no and I don’t have to give a reason why. You and the other posters can call it petty if you want. But it's a lot easier to say that when it's not your property getting used or damaged all the time.

Edited

You!

Muffinmam · 16/02/2026 13:46

You put road spikes in your driveway.

That’s what you do.

DinoLil · 16/02/2026 13:42

You need those stinger strips the police throw down, she won't drive over that!!

lessglittermoremud · 16/02/2026 13:42

I would abandon the fence and get some old granite troughs, the type you pick up in reclamation yards.
They used to be water troughs for animals and are so heavy it took 2 strong men to move ours into place. You can get them in a variety of widths as handmade, they look beautiful when planted out but if she hits one with her car, it isn’t going to damage anything bar her car.
You can get some with some height to them, they soon discourage her and they can’t easily be moved out the way.

9champions · 16/02/2026 13:42

SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 16/02/2026 13:39

Exactly this. Surely it would be cheaper, easier and far less stressful just to let it go??

Cheaper, easier, and less stressful, for who?

Anyway, I've made up my mind and I'm not going to change how I feel about this. I don’t want them using my property, and I have every right to say no and I don’t have to give a reason why. You and the other posters can call it petty if you want. But it's a lot easier to say that when it's not your property getting used or damaged all the time.

OP posts:
ReadingSoManyThreads · 16/02/2026 13:41

SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 16/02/2026 13:39

Exactly this. Surely it would be cheaper, easier and far less stressful just to let it go??

Wear and tear on driveways, particularly with the neighbour dry steering on it as she does, causes a lot of damage which is very costly to fix.

Fuzzybear22 · 16/02/2026 13:40

seaviewlassy · 16/02/2026 13:28

I could not get worked up about this! Do you think she's going to wear the drive down or something? Seems like such a non issue!

I agree

ReadingSoManyThreads · 16/02/2026 13:40

Why were you so nice to her about it? She's caused criminal damage. That was your perfect opportunity to tell her she MUST STOP crossing your driveway immediately.

She WILL break your fence too.

You need to be VERY firm with her.

SomedayIllBeSaturdayNight · 16/02/2026 13:39

seaviewlassy · 16/02/2026 13:28

I could not get worked up about this! Do you think she's going to wear the drive down or something? Seems like such a non issue!

Exactly this. Surely it would be cheaper, easier and far less stressful just to let it go??

9champions · 16/02/2026 13:38

StaySpicy · 16/02/2026 13:28

@9champions Something like this filled with soil and plants might fit? The 50cm width one is 17cm across. A couple if need be?

Just the first Google result.

www.gardencentreoxford.com/apta-jc-lead-trough?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=9520556366&gbraid=0AAAAACllc3T5mSrSclMV7yBWGySfwymcd&gclid=CjwKCAiAncvMBhBEEiwA9GU_frtl0zoE5f6Md7udZJfgvxmu6CgE3D-PUXebLjAi-L9Q5qVGvnYNoRoChOcQAvD_BwE

Thank you I will have a look at these!

OP posts:
MrsJeanLuc · 16/02/2026 13:38

Looloolullabelle · 16/02/2026 13:36

Tell her that each time she causes any damage to your property, whether it be your fence, planters or whatever else, you will be reporting it to her insurance company.

Then watch her shit herself her insurance goes through the roof due to the amount of incidents!

Interesting idea, but how exactly?

Looloolullabelle · 16/02/2026 13:36

Tell her that each time she causes any damage to your property, whether it be your fence, planters or whatever else, you will be reporting it to her insurance company.

Then watch her shit herself her insurance goes through the roof due to the amount of incidents!

9champions · 16/02/2026 13:35

seaviewlassy · 16/02/2026 13:28

I could not get worked up about this! Do you think she's going to wear the drive down or something? Seems like such a non issue!

It doesn’t matter. It’s my property, and I don’t want them using it. I should be able to put whatever I want on my land and not have to worry that some lazy entitled cheeky idiot is going to damage it because she can’t drive properly.

OP posts:
9champions · 16/02/2026 13:33

Flowerlovinglady · 16/02/2026 13:22

You can do all this stuff but presumably they might make your life more difficult (large planters/fences blocking your drive?). If you get into a dispute with her involving demands for payment, be aware that you may well have to declare that when you sell. It is infuriating though for you - I'm dealing with something my neighbour is doing that is impacting us and she won't stop it either so I get where you're coming from - just saying this because a lot of people who maybe haven't sold a house in a while are unaware of this.

Thank you! I totally agree, which is why I've been avoiding arguments with her so far. I'm not really sure what counts as a neighbour dispute since we haven't fallen out or exchanged any harsh words yet, and I'm hoping to keep it that way. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to tell her how I feel, but I think with people like her, you can't really change them, so there's no use in getting worked up over it. I'd much rather just put up the fence or whatever and move on. I don't want to fight with them. I just want them to stop using my bloody property! Luckily, because of the layout, they can't block my drive with anything (at least not legally)

OP posts:
GasPanic · 16/02/2026 13:32

I would probably put up the fence, but make sure it is inside the boundary and is protected by concrete posts that project out close to the border at fairly close intervals.

That way from your side you will still have a nice fence, but a row of posts to protect it.

DeftGoldHedgehog · 16/02/2026 13:29

seaviewlassy · 16/02/2026 13:28

I could not get worked up about this! Do you think she's going to wear the drive down or something? Seems like such a non issue!

Just that. She will wear the drive down doing that every day.

StaySpicy · 16/02/2026 13:28

@9champions Something like this filled with soil and plants might fit? The 50cm width one is 17cm across. A couple if need be?

Just the first Google result.

www.gardencentreoxford.com/apta-jc-lead-trough?gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=9520556366&gbraid=0AAAAACllc3T5mSrSclMV7yBWGySfwymcd&gclid=CjwKCAiAncvMBhBEEiwA9GU_frtl0zoE5f6Md7udZJfgvxmu6CgE3D-PUXebLjAi-L9Q5qVGvnYNoRoChOcQAvD_BwE

seaviewlassy · 16/02/2026 13:28

I could not get worked up about this! Do you think she's going to wear the drive down or something? Seems like such a non issue!

MrsJeanLuc · 16/02/2026 13:23

godmum56 · 16/02/2026 13:11

This. Why did you let the price of the planters go? I'd have also said something like "Good job it happened now and not next month, it would cost you a lot more once my new fence is up" with the MN tinkly laugh.

This.

Crazy not to take money from her for that. You have given her the message that it's ok to drive over your drive AND that she doesn't have to pay for any damage she does!

outerspacepotato · 16/02/2026 13:22

You should have taken her money. She damaged your property.

You're going to have to go with something big and immoveable that will damage their car if they aren't careful. I think they'd just damage your fence, then you'd have to get the money out of them somehow and would that count as a neighbour dispute if you sold?

Flowerlovinglady · 16/02/2026 13:22

You can do all this stuff but presumably they might make your life more difficult (large planters/fences blocking your drive?). If you get into a dispute with her involving demands for payment, be aware that you may well have to declare that when you sell. It is infuriating though for you - I'm dealing with something my neighbour is doing that is impacting us and she won't stop it either so I get where you're coming from - just saying this because a lot of people who maybe haven't sold a house in a while are unaware of this.

Thirdtimecancer · 16/02/2026 13:19

Growlybear83 · 16/02/2026 11:42

I think I would invest in large concrete planters rather than a fence. It would probably be cheaper, and the neighbour would really cause damage to her car if she hit them. They would also look nicer if you fill them with flowers.

Def this imo