To think society should stop glorifying self-care and prioritise community care?

Can you explain a bit more what you mean?
I think a balance of needs is good and reasonable and I think most people probably do.

I think that people are so focussed on what is right for them that they have forgotten that that might not be the best for the family/local area/general population. This is demonstrated by, for example, the number of people who think that it is OK to sing along at a musical because they like to do so. Or those who sit in seats that have been booked by others such as on the train and then say 'but I need the charger'

It’s a lack of community that’s created this.

Before people knew their neighbours, the local children played out together with different mums keeping an eye out. You knew the “Nosey Parker’s” across the road would know everything about anyone. Little old betty the widow who had lived there 50 years and so on.

Not many communities exist like that now.

People have stopped being interested in other people at a human level and treat them more as specimens in a zoo to be liked or put in their place. People have dissociated from their humanity, that's the problem.

Church used to offer that function, still does as best it can, but how many people do you know that go there now and offer their community support. What other organisation has taken their place, and can be the hub for organised support?

I do agree with you. I think in our society people have become quite selfish. I've married into an Asian family, and I do notice a difference. They are more focussed on others and the wider fanily than the average Brit is. I see so many posts on Mumsnet where people are actively encouraged to be selfish and not worry about anyone's else's feelings.
I do think we've lost a sense of community in many places, and that's a real shame.
I'll say one thing, though. Self care is very important. I myself care for several people, and I know that if I don't look after myself, I'm no good to anyone else. I really need to make sure I have time to eat well, exercise, have some time to relax and charge my batteries. If I don't, I'm a frazzled mess and can't look after others.

Both are important.

Do you have any more specific examples OP of the kind of thing you mean?

If you don't spend time looking after yourself, you won't have the energy to look after others.

Both are vital, imo.

Actually I think in many cases there is not enough emphasis on self care.

Teachers, social workers and doctors (and many other professions) burn out at high rates because they show up for others and go above and beyond for others and neglect self care.

@ThatJoyousCyanReader I agree with you but probably most people on here won't.

people only seem to help family now. Admittedly I don't have any so I'm very isolated and fear the future. Community seems to have fallen apart in recent years. I think the perception is probably that I'm stupid and should have chased marriage and children to secure a future. It all makes me feel very sad and low.

edit - before someone asks, I have always helped in the community, since I was a teen.

I’ve noticed this sort of thing too. Society seems to be becoming more individualistic. The number of people that I see now listening to music on loudspeaker on the train/tube or having conversations on speakerphone with their phone held flat on their palm is pretty staggering. Not so long ago that never really happened. There’s a lot of focus on “living your best life” without really thinking about others.

I really think it depends where you live, I definitely live in an area that has lots of diverse "communities" - but there's no guarantee you would necessarily fit in with any of them, or the duration you'd be in contact with them.

People tend to come together (as I observe in white English culture with lack of local extended family) for either a specific reason, or due to a location and are very wary of over committing in general.

Lots of places in the country you don't say good morning or smile and nod to a stranger without looking demented, so it's very different across the country.

Yes, please
what exact problems you are talking about?
I can see you update now.

We are really lucky. Live in a tiny street of just 10 properties where everyone knows each other by name, we nearly all contribute to keeping our street clean and tidy, keep an eye out for anything unusual, suspicious, tell each other if anyone gets burgled, take in parcels for each other, even share house keys if anyone goes on a long break, jump start each other’s cars, clear the snow, fetch shopping etc for anyone who is ill, check everyone is ok if there’s a power cut. All sorts of kind, well communicated, shared problem solving. We don’t live in each other’s houses, don’t pop round every five minutes, but there might be an occasion meal shared, a BBQ. Anyone new who moves in gets a quiet hello, a few names, then a gentle offer of any help if required. Privacy respected if this is preferred. Any issues with local council, we fight as a team, and it gets so much more achieved.
It’s not rocket science, but little neighbourly niggles don’t become major issues, everyone gets on, there’s lots of respect, and it makes for a much nicer environment. My Mum has similar adjacent neighbours. In the North by the way.

Why?
My generation had never been taught this, quite the opposite.
Now at 45, I'm finally enjoying putting myself first.

I work with teens and actually think this has been quite damaging for a lot of them. I work with a lot of young people who struggle hugely with forming friendships. They have absorbed messages about “speaking their truth”, prioritising their own “emotional safety” and setting their own “boundaries” and then get upset when others don’t want to spend time with them. The sad fact is that other teens don’t want to hang out with the kids who only want to talk about themselves and expect to be able to speak their mind completely freely regardless of others’ feelings but get upset the second anyone says or does something they don’t like.

I think 'self-care' is a bullshit term invented by capitalists to try and divert attention from the fact that their system is pretty much toxic to all.

It has the added bonus of making individualism seem like a 'progressive' thing, and communitarianism like an authoritarian thing. So selfishness is now a 'liberal' value.

It's a bit like how the hippies went on to invent tech and become arch-capitalists - they were the OG individualists. The only things that can prevent inequality are structural, which necessarily constrains the individual; it's easy for individualists to frame structures as 'the man' or 'the elite' or as fundamentally conservative.