My little one’s broken another child’s toy?

Indeed. It's very inconsiderate.

We have all ages using our playground - tiny toddlers just tottering around with no concept of personal ownership or 'mine' and 'yours' and (comparatively) big boys of 10 and 11 doing pull-ups on the monkey bars and hanging out with their friends. People do use remote-controlled cars and all the kids chase after them and it's at owner's own risk. If the kids/parents want to be left alone, there's a whole bloody big grassy park with paths just outside the fenced play area!

On the one hand, it was silly to bring a special toy to the park and also silly to keep it out if other kids were trying to get to it. If I’d been the Dad I’d have put it away to protect it.

But, yabu as it doesn’t sound like you were supervising closely enough.

They have every right to bring their toy to have fun with. If someone else's kid can't be redirected, they shouldn't have to miss out. If a parent can't manage their kid at a park so that kid is causing problems for others, of course they should leave, assuming they are a responsible parent. Sometimes things don't work out.

Remote-controlled cars are also a trip hazard for other kids running about using the playground in the normal way. They're really best kept to quieter areas.

Of course you have to manage them. You have to manage them anywhere and everywhere. A toddler and newborn aren't that hard. God knows how some of us coped with a few more kids than that and a toddler and newborn at the same time.

They have the right to take it with them @tinklingchimes but then you do have to accept that breakages may happen.

Yes the OP has been careless but actually she’s been a lot nicer than a lot of people would have been. I think a lot of parents would not only have not been supervising they would also have responded with a ‘fuck off’ if asked to replace said toy.

What if someone had done an ‘AIBU to let my child take an expensive toy to school’ and it broke? I think most of us would say it was silly to take a remote controlled car to a school playground and expect other children not to show an interest. This is no different. You’re on a playground; playgrounds are filled with kids, kids aren’t always careful.

As I’ve said, I left a playground when this happened to us rather than let my DS break a toy or ruin someone else’s play but to be honest I felt then as I do now I shouldn’t have had to.

@tinklingchimes I don’t think you’re reading what I’ve put at all. How is removing a toddler from a park not managing? Can you explain that?

No, because it is managing the situation. The point isn’t that I couldn’t manage the situation; the point is that it isn’t a situation I should have had to manage.

So you parented, like you should. Breakages are unlikely to happen if people are actively parenting their kids. Sometimes accidents happened but in this case, OP was negligent and should be held responsible.

Breakages are unlikely to happen if people are actively parenting their kids.

I disagree with this. It's easy for toys to get broken if there are lots of kids playing. Especially toy cars whizzing around underfoot.

Thank goodness it was the toy car that was broken and not a child injured tripping on the damn thing.

You have to manage your kids wherever you are, playground included. You are the one who said it was hard to manage. You still have to do it. I think you handled it appropriately so are obviously a sensible parent. I likewise always supervised my children and didn't sit there on my phone.

She was. She should have been paying closer attention and removed her children from the toy. It still doesn’t mean that the toy should have been there. If that toy had been taken onto a school playground and broken the responses would have been ‘what a bloody stupid thing to do.’ And the OP was at least reasonable in agreeing to pay. A lot of people would have point blank refused to.

I think that depends on the set up. I am picturing it like my local park where the playground area is well separated from the grassy area where you'd run cars around on. In that situation, there shouldn't be an accidental breakage by another child very easily.

If it is a situation where the cars are being run around the play equipment, then that is just stupid and an accident waiting to happen. Then I can see a breakage could easily happen if some kid trips on it (hopefully not their arm in that case). In that case the car owners are responsible.

Definitely a reverse. Why are you saying they’re ‘3/4’? You either know their ages or you don’t. And you clearly are the parent with the expensive toy.

3&3/4 is a short way of writing three and three quarter years.

Whether they should pay or not depends on the details of the situation really.

School playgrounds are low supervision areas and I really don't think anyone would bring that kind of toy to school. Yes, you'd be silly to bring it there.

There are plenty of people who don't take responsibility for their actions, who drive off when they ding someone's car, for example.

@tinklingchimes the OP does say

This little playground so far was a safe haven for us because it’s secure

It doesn’t sound like a big grassy park but a small enclosed playground. Someone wants to bring a toy, fine, but school playground or ‘normal’ playground there are going to be kids around and they aren’t famed for their careful approach to toys.

On the one hand, these things happen. On the other, you’ve literally put in writing that you weren’t attempting to parent, so I guess it’s on you. YABU, I’d probably replace in these circumstances and then you’ve learnt your lesson so you don’t make an expensive mistake like this again.

Right. Well that makes it even worse. Children under 4, particularly unusually energetic ones, should be supervised at the park. YABU OP

Even before the car got damaged I don't think you should let your twins' entertainment be chasing after other kids' toys. Take their own for them to play with.

And if you know that they like chasing the cars then this isn't the first time they've done it. Do you make it a deliberate plan to go when you know the cars will be there?

I suppose it depends on the set up of the park...if the cars were whizzing around/ under the play equipment then it was a daft place to play with them (although I still think op should have properly supervised her kids and stopped them chasing the cars)

If they had been on the grass/an area away from the swings and slides and where the majority were playing etc then I think its fine to play with the cars there.

I'd have sympathy for the op if her child had accidently trod on or tripped over the car but she allowed them to actively chase them and didn't stop them from doing this.

Maybe I'm miserable but it drives me mad when my teens are trying to play football and parents allow their much younger kids to come and try and join in. The young kids get in the way and could get hurt by my bigger, stronger kids. But by some responses, should my kids not expect to play with their own ball as the grass/football pitch is a public place therefore fair game to attract attention of others? Or should adults appropriately supervise their own children and stear them away from others activities.

I see parents/guardians much more on the phone in the playground.

It's not a race to the bottom OP!

I work at a local attraction and loads of parents need their phones surgically removed, while their kids wander around unsupervised.

It's really not something to aspire to.

I'd give you a pass if you were helping one twin with something, and the other one ran unexpectedly at the car in the few seconds you had eyes off. In this case you know they had form for car chasing, say you saw them chasing the cars (and didn't intervean?), and you were on your phone letting this happen. Even if the car hadn't been broken, you were still letting your kids spoil the other kids fun, which is pretty rude.

Parenting is stressful and we all have 'off days' or get overwhelmed from time to time. I'm not judging for that, I've messed up too in the past. I think you do need to own this mess up though, the 5yo who's car is broken is sad because you weren't supervising closely enough. You should definitely have offered to pay for the damage you let happen.

I think YABU and you need to suck it up and pay for it.

When I was a child I borrowed a book from a friend and our kitten chewed the cover. My parents bought my friend a new copy and we kept the chewed version. When my kids borrowed a playmobil car from their friend a couple of years ago, something broke on it so I replaced it and we kept the broken version.

These things happen and kids break stuff by accident, but their parents should replace an item if it belonged to someone else.