To feel desperately sorry for kids leaving state "care"?

I’ve only known one care leaver personally but my god she was failed.
I was furious for her.

You think they stay in care until 18?

I've taught 16 year olds who are living independently.

And of course their flat / bed sit is where all the other in the class go on a weekend.

Of course YANBU

Its heartbreaking

Care leavers in Wales get a guaranteed basic income. It doesn’t help with a lot of your list, and more should be done, but it’s at least a start. Of course a lot of right wingers hate it (especially since unaccompanied asylum seekers fall into the care leaving population once they reach adulthood).

I think it’s rubbish.

But also, it’s is life for many not in care. I left as soon as I turned 18, and have never had anyone to support me or house me bar myself. I wasn’t until I met dh that I then had ‘family’ to acknowledge things and share events.

Yanbu. It's disgraceful.

I was in care (children's home) , booted out the night I turned 16 and a half (precisely). They had rung a pals mom and asked if I could sleepover, of course she said yes albeit surprised. I turned up with my bags full of my stuff with my residential support worker to apparently move in. Obviously that 'placement' broke down and I was put into a hostel a few weeks later. I was 16, sharing with adult heroin users and homeless people, I was terrified. Luckily my grandparents then took me in for a few months. This was about 30 years ago but I still bear the scars (literally on my wrists).

It's disgusting. My mum works for a LA in a job specifically supporting care leavers and charities who support them. Might be worth a look on your local council website for ways to support them

I worked in Residential Children's Homes for many years and a lot of effort and money went into supporting our young people at the transition age of 18/19. But it's complicated and difficult - most children in care remain in contact with their birth families, despite the threshold for coming into care being extremely high and the children having experienced a huge amount of neglect and abuse. Their behaviour is understandably very challenging and they're extremely vulnerable to the continuing influence of their families (and other people who don't have their best interests at heart).

We could, and always did, set up supported housing, an income, training or work but we couldn't police who they hang out with. I mean, under 16 it's difficult to do this but we could intervene more successfully, once they're adults it's impossible. The support was there but rarely did it keep the young care leavers safe.

I left that work eight years ago, worn out and dispirited, I expect things have got worse with funding cuts and it's harder to recruit good staff too.

Thanks @blowdryrat a lot of us were good kids, left high and dry. It wasn't down to any behavioural challenges we had or bad behaviour (as was the experience of previous poster in her job).

We were just abandoned. Horrible experience. To go from being cared for and looked after for the first time in your life to being abandoned all over again. It was so deeply traumatising.

The 16/17 year olds being put off in bedsits/flats, or sometimes a canal boat, or given a tent - that's what is termed "supported accommodation" and councils tend to use it because it's cheaper than the full care of a children's home. It's been an unregulated area, but now the law has changed so it at least needs to be registered and inspected.

But shouldn't a child of 16/17 who is "looked after" by the local authority expect some level of "care" rather than just "support"?

Worked in this field - it it is awful. Already vulnerable then left to it. Some foster carers carry on unpaid. But really as the state has declared their birth parents unfit, the state really should be ‘Uber’ parents and give them support until mid twenties. It’s a very complex area but basic practicalities such as financial and housing support are relatively straight forward.

It's dreadful. No wonder they have some of the worst life outcomes.

I wouldn't say the homes are much better, as there was a children's home set up in one of the large houses (much to the dismay of the neighbours) vise to where a friend lived. We spoke to the teenagers and what it was like and I don't think they were exaggerating when they said how awful it was.

I donate to a local care leavers Christmas dinner every year. I think there are quite a lot around the country. You can buy gifts for the young people and also donate to the costs. It must be a lonely time of year for young people on their own.

I do agree much more should be done to support these young people properly.

I was a Supported Lodgings provider for 2 care leavers. It's a great concept - a young person leaving full time care comes and stays with me, learns (in theory!) to do their own washing, some cooking, learn to budget. When they're ready, they are then helped to move on to their own housing/flat/bedsit. It's really tough, my second placement fell apart after 3 years but we are still in touch and she's doing ok. The lack of support post 18 is horrendous. Up until then, they still have a social worker, afterwards a Personal Assistant who is supposed to support them. That support, however, entails 'being in touch at least every six weeks'. This can be a text/email and it doesn't need to get a response. Any help required is non-existent as the PA has too heavy a caseload and generally just says that the care leaver should be able to manage themselves. And there just aren't enough Supported Lodgings providers.

I did it because I looked at the amount of support my own daughters had when they left home - I was there at the end of a phone for those 'how do I' questions, for advice, to loan a tenner or buy a treat if they're down. Care leavers don't have that, and I could be there for one of them. It was rewarding, and I'd do it again if I had the room - I moved to a different local authority that doesn't provide the service, or I'd do it for a Uni student care leaver.

Many people aren't aware that there are provisions for some care leavers, but not enough for all of them :(

Sounds awful 😕

I couldn't agree more, the unfairness of hamstringing these young people from the very start is horrible. There is a good charity that supports exactly this group, if anyone is interested in supporting them. It is called Become, spread the word the next time your office is looking for a good cause to support! https://becomecharity.org.uk/

It’s hellish. I did my uni dissertation on this very subject over 30 years ago and it doesn’t seem to have got any better, in fact it’s probably worse due to the increased numbers in care

I wonder what happens to children with disabilities/additional needs then who are unable to help themselves?

I worked for a charity that provided "hostel" ( for want of a better word...they were decent student type en suite rooms) but each house had staff who supported the young people with cooking, budgeting, socialising, education etc. And eventually supported them in moving on.

It was a great model and worked well. More of that needed.

If you're a care leaver at university you get access to your accommodation for the entire year. If your accom Is one that closes during the holidays they place you in another. Christmases weren't fun on my own in my flat but I had a roof and I could work and had a registered address for 3 years that was covered by my full maintenance + care leavers bursery. I was in a MUCH better position that most students. (Graduated 2023)

I know of a situation where the care leaver won a place at a prestigious university. Her social worker ended up buying her a laptop out of his own money as the LA refused to help.

Thanks very much for this!