So I posted recently about dp's exw and her frankly neglectful behaviour towards dsc's...
Well having had a long chat with dp we decided that as exw has not been back to docs with either dsc they won't have discussed the headlice issue and as she is still digging her heals in and refusing to treat we decoded that talking to my new hv for advice would be best as both the headlice and the fungal infection poses a massive risk to our dd (6mo) and should she contract either she cannot receive medical treatment for them.
So hv came today and I had a very long and very productive chat with her. The outcome of which boils down to the following
- she classed exw behaviour as neglect
- if I report my concerns to her officially rather than advice seeking today then she has to report to SS as a neglect case and has to inform them where the information came from ie name and shame dp and I
- we can discuss further with dsc's school nurse for further advice buy again point 2 applies of we report concerns
- we can report her ourselves directly to SS anonymously and they will have to investigate but we would be kept completely out of it
So I am now completely at a loss as to what to do as is dp.
Do we report her ourselves?
Do we report concerns to school nurse/hv and let them report to SS?
Do we try again to talk to exw and use the option of reporting to SS to make her take this seriously?
All 3 have downsides. I don't want to look like we are threatening her but the kids are suffering and both dp and I are concerned for their health and so far the "nicely nicely" approach has got us nowhere
If it was you guys what would you do?