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How to spoil husbands illicit weekend - ideas please!

(266 Posts)
WGC3 Wed 11-Sep-19 22:55:56

We are still together but on verge of separating. I know where and when he is going, cant stop it happening but would like to make sure it is less than perfect - any advice??

Expo Wed 11-Sep-19 22:57:36

Leave him too it. Move on. Too much emotional energy. Disentangle yourself and live YOUR life - not his.

Hawkmoth Wed 11-Sep-19 22:58:11

Do you have roses in your garden? Open up a rosehip. The tiny hairs inside are itching powder. That's all I know.

Aquamarine1029 Wed 11-Sep-19 22:58:32

My advise is to behave like an adult and keep your beak out. You're separating. Why do you even care what he does? Don't lower yourself by being so petty.

LizzieSiddal Wed 11-Sep-19 23:00:32

When he says goodbye as he goes off on his illicit weekend, just say “I know where you’re going, don’t bother coming back”.

It’s not a good idea to play games, just be honest then move on with your own life.x

ConfCall Wed 11-Sep-19 23:01:07

If you’re separating leave him to it OP. See a solicitor. Good luck.

MrsBlondie Wed 11-Sep-19 23:01:11

Grow up and leave him alone. if you are seperating why do you care

WGC3 Wed 11-Sep-19 23:03:46

because I don't want to separate...

Happyspud Wed 11-Sep-19 23:04:09

I like the rose hip plan. Or shag him before he leaves and then text him when you know he’s on his way and apologise because you’ve just discovered you’ve chlamydia. Dr. gave you pills for him too. (Double whammy CIA he’ll wonder where you got it!)

Aquamarine1029 Wed 11-Sep-19 23:06:07

because I don't want to separate...

Unfortunately, that's not just your decision. He clearly does. You just have to accept it and move on.

LimitIsUp Wed 11-Sep-19 23:06:24

You don't want to separate? Why would you try and hold onto a relationship where your partner has clearly checked out of it?

Lipz Wed 11-Sep-19 23:06:58

There's a muscle spray you can buy, (can't think of the name of it) it works like deep heat but doesn't have that strong smell of deep heat, spray that inside all his jocks, he's bound to be packing some of them so do them all to be sure. Or an open tin of sardines in the bag when he has it packed and closed up, just slip them in.

UncleMatthewsEntrenchingTool Wed 11-Sep-19 23:07:01

Chop a chilli in half and rub it inside all of his pants

Namechangeforthiscancershit Wed 11-Sep-19 23:08:04

As in you've found out via another means or he has come clean?

SandyGusset Wed 11-Sep-19 23:09:17

Call the hotel and ask for separate beds

UncleMatthewsEntrenchingTool Wed 11-Sep-19 23:09:36

Is he taking the car? Fish in the vents/under the seats?
Put some diesel in the tank if petrol or vice versa.

SandyGusset Wed 11-Sep-19 23:09:36

And a wake up call of 5am

UncleMatthewsEntrenchingTool Wed 11-Sep-19 23:11:26

Laxitives in his food before he goes.

Accidentally knock his phone down the toilet/put in the washing machine

QueenieMum Wed 11-Sep-19 23:12:19

If you do any of the things mentioned in this thread he's going to know who did it and why and it won't endear you to him. If you don't want to separate tell him before he leaves, even if you've told him already. All you can do is be honest about your feelings & what you want. If he doesn't want the same then stop wasting your energy.

UncleMatthewsEntrenchingTool Wed 11-Sep-19 23:12:22

Pop the chop out of his bank card and put the card back in his wallet

teenagetantrums Wed 11-Sep-19 23:12:26

Honestly why play childish games
He's just not the not you anymore. Pack his stuff and change the locks.

UncleMatthewsEntrenchingTool Wed 11-Sep-19 23:12:47


HappyHammy Wed 11-Sep-19 23:12:54

If you scupper it this could make him more determined to separate do you really want to stay with him knowing he is spending the weekend with someone else. It must be really hurtful but you need to look after yourself. Maybe you could go away that weekend yourself and not be home when he is due back. Does he know how you feel. Its cruel for him to stay with you at home if he has met someone else.

Drogosnextwife Wed 11-Sep-19 23:13:01

Hang on, this guy is having an affair and OP is to grow up and keep her beak out. As she said, they are still together, I take it that means they have just been having problems and have talked about separating but haven't done it yet. That gives the husband permission to go and shag someone else before he has even left is wife. I've heard it all on hear now 🤔

TeaForDad Wed 11-Sep-19 23:13:11

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

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