yes of course it, as you know it must be hard to accept I would suggest you talk to someone IRL, either 1-1 (a counsellor) or go to a group like freedom programme wher you will see it as part of a pattern of abusive behaviour- that many women have experienced, and survived, and can put behind them best of luck
OP, so sorry this has happened to you. And it must have been playing on your mind for some time.
As far as you not having it as bad as some others, rape is not marked 'out of 10' so you don't need to minimise it. Maybe seek some counselling. It sounds like it needs to come out. You don't have to do any more. Just talk to someone about it.
No is no, doesn't matter if it's a stranger or somebody you've been with for 50 years.
I'm sorry you had to go through this, but glad to hear you're divorced now. Lots of people do minimise things like this, you're not alone in doing that. He was disgusting. It wasn't as bad as some have it is part of it. Others going through other things doesn't make yours any better. Don't ever think he was justified just because you were married.
I have trouble getting my head round this too because it means ex-H raped me too. There was no violence, no threats but I said "No" and pulled away but he carried on, I wanted to scream but didn't because I didn't want to scare the kids. I hear where you are coming from Why I really do.
You are completely and totally NOT being dramatic or over sensitive. Not at all. Being married does not give a man the right to have sex with you whenever and wherever he wants. I am so very sorry this happened to you. The shouting and banging is intimidating. It's abuse. The way you say don't REALLY want to. Makes it sound like you were scared of him. I'm guessing he may have affected you more than physically. Made you scared, doubt yourself, convinced you it was your fault or you wanted it really. All Classic abuser tricks.
Hells bells I've not spoken to rape crisis. It wasn't recent and I don't think they would be bothered about someone like me. It's not like it was a dark alley or he threatened me at knife point or anything.
Reading that back it sounds so pathetic. I'm a feminist and if my friend told me that I'd say it was rape, just so hard to admit it to myself. Wish I never had to see him again.
Someone like you. They exist to help someone like you. You deserve help and support. A dark alley and a knife don't automatically make it a "worse" rape. You seem to think it wasn't really rape because you were married. (Or maybe because of mind games he pulled.) You aren't pathetic. You are struggling to process a horrendous thing.