The yuk factor

[Snotmeitsyou]

Not sure if I am in the right forum here but anyway. DP stays with me most weekends as he works away. Been together for 18 years but not lived together - reluctance on my part really.
DP seems to have some mucky behaviours I struggle with. For example, this weekend he uses loo as usual, flushed several times, then uses loo brush to 'help' contents of pan flush away. Loo brush back in holder, covered in poo. I then have to clean brush and holder.
Last week I found poo smears on wall next to loo roll. He must have got his hands dirty wiping arse then used loo roll.
He recently got into car with big poo smear up back of t-shirt. I guess he wiped bum but belt was in way and smeared his shirt.
Using his car I found crispy stuff under driver's seat - he had wiped nose on hand then wiped under seat I guess.
He can't eat a meal without getting food around face or on clothing/floor.
All this makes me feel queasy and affects how I feel about him. He is a good person but thinks I over react. He finds it funny.
Is it me or am I being a bit too fussy here?

[ShoutOutToMyEx]

That's absolutely fucking disgusting.

[rumred]

Jesus I nearly brought my tea up reading this...
Why are you cleaning up after him? Does he smell? Can't imagine such vile habits mean he's clean

[ShoutOutToMyEx]

I posted too soon in my disgust.

I would be asking for noticeable changes to hygiene and cleanliness ASAP else I'd be leaving. It's not even the fact he's so dirty and repulsive, it's the fact he expects you to clean it up.

[Goforit2017]

I feel sick just reading that.

Not being able to wipe your own backside is toddler behaviour.

[Wishiwasmoiradingle2017]

Continue to live apart..
Reduce contact or drag him naked to the car wash daily. .

[rumred]

What shoutout said.

Are children around this dirty creature? I'm no clean freak but what you describe is awful

[Snotmeitsyou]

Not a poo troll ILostit. DP doesn't seem to realise he is doing it and I feel mean when I point it out so I tend to keep quiet. He has regular baths etc and doesn't smell.

[Snotmeitsyou]

I bought some of those Andrex wet wipes for him to use. He tends to ball up lots of toilet paper, wet it, wipe bum then flush but leaved bits of wet paper all over loo floor. He is on statins which he says results in him using loo for no 2s two or three times a day.

[rumred]

Wtf is a poo troll?

[Redyellowpinkblue]

He may have regular baths but I bet his arse stinks and his pants must be hellish. It's absolutely gross, to not be able to wipe your bum is absolutely unacceptable in an adult (without medical/mental/good reason)!
I couldn't have sex with someone who was this grim, in fact id be reluctant to even have him sit in my home with poo up his shirt

[Sparrowlegs248]

This is gross. You need to tell him, fold the paper, wipe and repeat. Then use the moist paper in the same way. Don't wet loo roll ffs it doesn't work!

Sit him down and tell him. It's really bloody awful.

[DoItTooJulia]

I can't type anything polite enough, but I will try.

Anybody would find this rank-you know that right? And he must too. Therefore he is showing you the ultimate disrespect and contempt to smear shit in your home and make no attempt or effort to properly clean it up and to then accuse you of over reacting.

[Snotmeitsyou]

Look, I swear to God I am nor a Poo Troll (not even sure what that is) so please stop accusing me. I just wanted others' opinion on whether I am over reacting to an otherwise OK man who seems blind to these incidents.

[Snotmeitsyou]

He just doesn't notice he's made mess. I have just wiped walls near light switch where he has turned on light with muddy hands before washing them.

[NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom]

That is fucking disgusting, no way could I have sex with someone so inept at something as simple as arse wiping.
If he can't do it now he never will, dump him.

[Snotmeitsyou]

Bog off BalaRua, I AM NOT A TROLL!

[KingBob]

That is fucking grim

My DP is so paranoid about getting poo on himself that he won't poo whilst wearing a top. Literally strips down. Even when in public toilets he takes everything off to have a shit 😂

[EggysMom]

You are not over-reacting.

Bleurgh.

[Snotmeitsyou]

Wish I'd never posted this. Though I was being over sensistive.

[CaoNiMartacus]

This is kind of missing the point, but I am trying to work out how the poo got onto his t-shirt from his belt, and how it got onto the belt in the first place.

In any case, he sounds like a right mucky blighter. I wouldn't be standing for it.