August 2021 - They've been here for half a year

[BertieBotts]

Can you believe it! Our lovely little ones are (roughly) halfway to their first birthdays.

Welcome friends old and new for discussion of sleep, teeth, weaning, milestones, navigating post-baby relationships and the whole existential dread of parenthood... I mean those amazing moments when they make your heart melt. Or produce a poo that makes the wallpaper melt. Oh, all of them. Nothing is off limits because it's just good to know that somebody else has been there.

Hello! Checking in :)

Thanks for the new threat @BertieBotts and the sleep article that was an interesting read!

Dd ate half a fruit pouch today! Oh my goodness the difference in her eating it compared to when I was trying a week or 2 ago!

What is jessicapebbles clothes again? I can't find the link anymore!

Hello :)

Dd tried some baby rice today, her first solid food....well, wore most of it lol

Thank you for the new thread @BertieBotts lovely intro as usual.

Purple (can’t tag you as you haven’t commented just yet!) I hope your okay. It is totally normal to have days where you just want to run away and hide, and it’s completely acceptable to put baby down and just have 5 to yourself and just to chill out a little. Be kind to yourself. Are you able to go out on your own or with friends without Leo? Sometimes we just need the space, after all we were our own person before we were mother’s and I think that often gets lost and can make us feel like we have lost our identity.

@Smurf123 it’s pebbleandpickle on Instagram.

Checking in 🙋🏼‍♀️ Thank you for the new thread, Bertie!

@Magik01 and everyone who commented, thank you for cheering up an exhausted mum ❤ DH will take half a day off and take him swimming so I can have an hour and a half to myself. Also booked a haircut and toner for next week, so another hour and a half then. I spend a lot of time with friends/mum friends in the week. 90% of us have young kids so going out without them is near impossible to coordinate. Two are pregnant again and unwell/can't drink or eat as normal. I am going to plan something with my non-mum friend one eve though. I know what I need and that is half a day or thereabouts at a spa to switch off. I'd love to go to a theatre too and just sit somewhere in the sun with a coffee and a good book, on my own. Or with my cat. That's my dream.

@Daffodil21 The meltdown sounds dreadful, it got me feeling all hot and flustered when I was reading your post. It feels awful when it happens in public, it will take me ages to learn not to get anxious about it. One of the mums at my buggyfit was talking about it the other day and she said she only learnt with her second baby that people don't generally care so there's no point getting stressed. Yes, some may give evil stares or huff and puff, but they won't even renember a minute later. Easier said than done though. I am dreading toddler tantrums looking at what some of my friends are going through now, I can tell they're stressed and you gotta have lots of confidence and patience of a saint not to be! xx

Yay new thread!

Totally get what everyone was saying about meltdowns, I finally got Ivy to sleep at 10 tonight (early for her) only for my bloody DM to call to ask about some fucking TV programme, soundly waking an instantly hysterical baby.

I'm not gonna lie there were tears (and not just the baby's)

@Magik01 I thought that's what it was but couldn't find it last night. Found it fine this morning so was obviously just too tired yesterday they are all gorgeous!

Ds woke dd at 720 This morning. So dh woke me to tell me ds had woken dd. Dh was already up and getting ready for work and he doesn't need to leave to after 830 so why the did he feel the need to wake me. Be a parent deal with it yourself. It's not that either of them were grumpy just happy awake.

Congratulations on the sex RandomCat :o

Absolutely yep - when people see a crying baby/toddler in public they generally look at first to check nothing awful is happening but once it's clear it's just a baby being a baby they probably just feel sympathy for you! Well there are a few judgy twats that would think you should magically be able to prevent all crying but they are idiots and don't count.

Yay for Smurf and kip food progress! Brilliant :)

At the moment we either have incredibly enthusiastic meals or it immediately makes him do a giant poo and then he is too cross to finish :o but he is much happier to self feed than accept food off a spoon, has to have his own spoon when I feed him and can use the spoon (if I load it up) with about 50% accuracy.

Re-learning latch after new tooth is a bit ouchy. I know it will settle in a couple of days but the bottom ones are always the worst.

Thanks @BertieBotts - I'm already confused and reading your posts as @PurplePansy05 's 😂

@PurplePansy05 definitely so important to make sure you can hand DS to DH and switch off from him for a bit. I think I would actually go insane if I didn't have a couple of hours break in the evenings. I'm working until late, so it's not a 'break' as such, but it really does feel like one to be doing things hands free and not have to keep stop-starting or listen to a whiney baby (thankfully walls are thick so I can't hear much even though I'm not far away 😀). Of course in those few hours DH has him he isn't as whiney as some of the episodes I've had during the day 🙄

Re: meltdown, yeah it wasn't fun but I'd found a dress so I just got on the move again (after a massive meltdown nappy change but toilet's we're empty thankfully). He'd temporarily calmed down before I attempted the nappy change or I wouldn't have bothered but I also knew he was about to leak to had to be done. Anyway, he was fine once we were on the move and fell asleep in the pram. In the next shop a child (around 1 I think) was having an absolute meltdown in the buggy. The woman was alone and looked stressed so I made sure I told her I'd just had exactly the same in the last shop! Of course DS looked lovely and peaceful at this point so she probably didn't believe me 😂

@RandomCatGenerator yay!!

@sarah13xx that sounds so tough! Sending you 

@sarah13xx that was supposed to say!

@Daffodil21 thanks!

He continued to be sick after every bottle so I tried to phone the HV this morning. Didn’t get an answer then he brought up another full bottle so just decided to phone the doctors instead. Got him an appointment at lunch time. He has a temperature and is so lethargic too now. He told me to give him calpol and get a urine sample if I can, haven’t attempted it yet because he’s barely been awake since. The calpol is making him even more sleepy now, feel so sorry for him 😔 he has at least managed to keep down a few oz of half milk half water though at least. Wee soul, this is the first time he’s been properly ill ☹️

Oh noo @sarah13xx I hope he's better soon! How tf are you meant to get a urine sample is beyond me!

Ugh having one of those days today and I'm not sure why 😔 (sharing because I want a moan) we had a nice time at playgroup earlier and I just can't really figure out why I'm feeling down/irritable. I think it might be because DH has been so busy round the house - he's the type who can't sit still for a moment and so when I'm sitting with the baby napping on me or even just watching a show on TV I feel like I should be doing something else. I'm also a bit irritated that for his parents' visit this weekend he's busy trying to move things around the house to cater for their sensibilities (I'm renovating a dolls house which he wants to keep in the shed because his mum is still upset about a dolls house made by her dad which was ruined by water years ago). The problem with him being always busy is I'm default baby carer, but I feel like I can't moan because it's not like he's sitting around doing nothing - even if what he is doing isn't urgent. Argh 😒

@sarah13xx sorry to hear he's poorly - I hope he feels better soon, poor little mite xx

Oh @sarah13xx getting a urine sample from a baby boy is the worst! I had to do it when DS was 3 weeks old and we ended up in hospital (lethargic too and low body temp). Big hugs, it was a nightmare! I hope he feels better soon! ❤

@biscuitcat Totally justified to feel shit. I mean, you're stuck with baby whilst he's catering to the needs of people who don't evdn live with you (and sounds a bit OTT on that front). Bound to be annoying. But don't feel guilty that you're not doing stuff, you ARE - just different to your DH. He should really take the baby off you and give you a break though instead of moving the doll house 🙄

@Daffodil21 Well done for saying this to the other mum. We all need it. And well done on finding the dress despite the meltdowns!!!

@RandomCatGenerator I haven't cheered your sex update yet - sorry! Here's the BIG CHEER 🎆 🥳 xx

Oh and thanks so much for the counsellor recommendation @RandomCatGenerator, my former one is twice as expensive (if not more now) so I'll definitely consider. I now have a confirmed diagnosis of a generalised anxiety disorder with elements of PTSD stemming mostly from my first MC. It's spot on and tbh, a relief that someone has finally agreed with what I knew deep down for a long time. Whether this will pass with some help or whether I am facing a lifelong battle of parenting whilst trying to keep my own fears away from DS (which is exhausting) I don't know. I wish shit never happened to me, but it is what it is and I now have to get on with my new life as a mother whilst this is still dragging me down.

On a happier note, today I discovered baby likes cous cous with roasted courgettes and peppers which makes me happy as it's one of my favourite lunches 😊 I blitzed it a bit in a food processor with a tiny bit of water and he really enjoyed it. Can also recommend Little Love silicone spoons if anyone's looking to buy - great for little hands, great for teething (he chews on them) and also interesting to touch (sensory).

Do you ladies think I can start giving him feta cheese? Or stick to plain cheddar for now? xx

Just checking in. Ta for the new thread. Been a bit absent due to DD having horrible sleeps so I'm just too tired to even look at my phone. She's had a rotten cold though which she's now passed to me of course. But putting her down tonight was something else. We resorted to calpol in case it was her teeth.

I'll catch up on all the messages.

Ooh yummy, I love courgettes.

I'd check the salt content but otherwise I don't think there's anything dangerous about feta is there? I know you should avoid soft cheese like in pregnancy due to the listeria risk. And a little bit should be fine even if it's salty.

Alex loves all bread products... We had curry tonight and he was having a great time sucking on a garlic naan. I have saved him a bit of rice with some of the sauce for tomorrow's lunch, it was very mild.

Hope your little one is okay Sarah. Did you manage to get a urine sample? I suppose you could just sit them naked on some kind of plastic surface and then try to aim it into a pot.

Oh...I forgot to say, re peeing and aiming...DS peed all over the HV today as she was weighing him, including her face. I walked in and saw him lying naked on the scales and a fountain of wee going all the way up.

I don't like my HV, but still Mortified. xx

@sarah13xx hope he's ok! Ds used to have to get regular urine tests (and blood tests) as a baby as he had high calcium levels which they needed to monitor but we were given pads to put in his nappy just after he'd been fed to try and catch a wee maybe they could get you this to try?

Any baby constipation cures? I can try a prune pouch but she will likely only eat a spoonful or 2

I have guilt. I was just feeding DD and right as she fell asleep she did a poo and I just left her and put her back in the cot She'll probably wake soon anyway but I couldn't deal with waking her to change her.

We did a wee experiment yesterday and gave DD more food during the day and it's really helped her sleep. Before I was only giving her something once a day and not every day but she's clearly ready for more. She had weetabix yesterday and loved it. I feel we're buying too many of the Ella pouches but OH clearly doesn't think much of my puree ideas! Today I'm going to try her on salmon and peas.

Thanks everyone! Haven’t attempted it yet, he was literally awake for his bath and that was it last night. Didn’t think there was much point getting one just to post it through the doctors door and have it sitting there all night, thought it might need to have been done recently so going to try and lie him on his mat naked this morning and see how long it takes, at least it’s a cold day! 😂 @Smurf123 they sound sooo much easier!

We tried Weetabix too, with some formula milk and mashed up fruit. I might add fruit to mine now, never thought it was a good idea until I tried his 🤣 Cheaper than buying separate baby cereal too. xx

:o When DS2 was newborn we had to get some extra checks before he left hospital and he managed to wee AND poo on the hot paediatrician (even DH said he was hot!) The doctor just looked down and said "Oh. He is shitting." :o

My tumble dryer is here!! I am very boringly excited by this. Want to try it out... if he will just go to sleep.

Little bit of water always gets DS to poo, also being in the jumperoo/held with his legs bunched up.

Last night we had curry and he loved sucking on a garlic naan so I saved him some of the rice with a bit of sauce mixed in for lunch today.