Quick potted history. With boyfriend 9 months. Not that serious but we had had the exclusive talk. Met on a dating site.
About a month ago had a feeling something wasn't right. Few nights he was supposed to be here and cancelled for dopey reasons that set my spidey sense tingling.
Looked on the dating site and lo and beholdy there is was, active, having logged in in the last 24 hours.
But I am not as stupid as he thinks I am.
I set up a profile called thisblokeliesandcheats (it's been taken down) with all his details except photo and spelled out what he'd done (thanks whoever that was who suggested that one) and I will probably do it again
At this point he's said he's coming here Thursday night to stop for the weekend (he doesn't work Friday)
BUT he has also arranged to meet "Anna" off the dating site at a lovely new restaurant for lunch on the Friday about an hour away from here (half an hour from his house)
Obviously, I am Anna.
So, how long do I keep this going. My teeth are itching I want to tell him so much 
Am also a little upset, but I had nothing invested in the relationship, so my pride has taken a hit and I feel a bit of a mug but other than that am grand.
Mumsnet classics
As the name suggests, I am sadly (but not that sadly) doing a shiney penguin....
sadlydoingshineypenguins · 24/08/2011 07:52
I did this once. Found out my oh was on a dating site so I created a fake profile and I didn't even have to contact him, the idiot contacted me within hours of the profile being live.
We talked for a while and in that time he slagged me off something rotten, said his "ex" (we were still supposedly happy together) was boring and had let herself go and was a bit of a slapper (I wasn't!). He said he'd been unhappy for years before he left me (remember we were still living together at this point) and that he'd regretted having children with me as he felt trapped.
I was gutted and so hurt it was hard to act normal in front of him to keep this silly game up. We arranged to "meet" one Friday evening. To me he told me he was going for a few drinks with his friends. This was the fun part as I kept saying I wanted to go with him, its amazing how many excuses they can think up on the spot.
Eventually he went. I did intend to turn up as the date but I chickened out and "stood him up". He arrived home an hour later in a foul mood. I asked him what was up and he just said he was tired. When I eventually broke it to him that I was "Olivia" he pretended he knew all the time it was me and that he was saying those things to me to pay me back for trying to set him up.
Yeah right 
Anna won't put a photo on the site in case she attracts weirdos.
Anna won't give out her mobile number until the end of a first date so that it's easier for her to walk away without getting hassled (he spewed his almost immediately)
Anna looks exactly like me same height and build but is a total and utter bimbo airhead. "knows how to treat a man" and can't spell for toffee (which again makes my teeth itch)
Shuttupanddrive am torn between turning up with my mate, not turning up at all, or turning up and being Anna
Brightskye - that's what he did, contacted me within a couple of hours. At least I've no kids with him 
that's awful for you
I actually bought a £10 mobile from Tesco and gave him that number. It was almost funny watching him sneak off into the bathroom unknowingly texting the person sat in his own living room
I'm short fat and ugly! How's about I go and meet
Him?! I could really ham it up and scare the living Bejeezus out of him!
I don't know what he intends to do for Friday lunchtime - he's arranged to meet Anna at 1 so he would need to be away from here by 12
I actually can't even be annoyed to waste the tenner on a cheap mobile
sadly....will you do the set up like shiney and tiger?
posh....tell us more
That is true. Am struggling to act normal over the phone. I have an inane urge to giggle when he tells me how much he's looking forward to the weekend
LOL both of those are excellent suggestions
Outdoor action, tie him to a tree, leave him there and shove a note in his mouth that says "you've just been mumsnetted"
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I nearly did that last night Quint I nearly just said "forget it you liar I know you're messing me around so fuck off"
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