Advanced search

The Westministenders / Media Baron Hunger Games continues. Who is trying to outmanoeuvre who?

(974 Posts)
RedToothBrush Thu 07-Jul-16 16:21:31

Don't worry we've all lost track.

In the Blue Corner
It started out with Cameron and Osborne trying to win the battle of the Tories, but they got stung in a UK wide vote. Some of us thought it was about the 'EU'. Instead it has turned out it was an internal Tory Bitch fight between some old Oxford and Eton mates, whilst for others a protest vote at being disenfranchised.
Gove and Johnson stabbed Cameron & Osborne in the back to run for Team Leave. Then they won when they didn't expect to. And there was no Plan. Uh Oh. Then it all started to go really wrong.
Cameron quit in disgust. Johnson went all President Churchill, before he also got stabbed by Gove (possibly with the assistance of the dark influence of Osborne).
We now have a Tory Smackdown with the shadowy influence of the Media Barons in the background.

#Team Gove has been doing their best with the knives. This is a mission to stab as many Tory MPs in the back as possible in order to become PM. Sponsored and supported by Murdoch

#Team Leadsom has been selling more unicorns and trying to pretend her CV and tax return are completely transparent. Think positive and the economy will be just fine. She is the homeopathy of politics. Sponsored and supported by Arron Banks,, UKIP and Britain First.

#Team May has been threatening to deport everyone if the EU don't play nice. Sponsored and supported by The Daily Mail's Dacre

In The Purple Corner
Tragically, it appears that not only do UKIP have a Plan A, they also have outwitted everyone by having Plan B. Yes that’s right TWO plans.
Farage has swanned off –sacked—for a life on CBB so they are looking for a new leader.
The potential candidates are all equally loathsome. They include Arron Banks himself, a suspended member of the party and several other people with an uncanny ability to put their foot in their mouths.
If this wasn't horrible enough, Team Leadsom is increasingly starting to look like a UKIP take over bid of the Conservative Party, which might be a neat way of avoiding a leadership battle of their own considering the quality of the candidates on offer.

In short, its a bit like a Bad Dystopian Movie that invokes Godwin, set in 2016 Westminster. Except its real.
In the Red Corner
Meanwhile the WMD has finally gone off in the Labour Camp, as Chilcot has been published. However the Chicken Coup rattles on regardless.

Corbyn is STILL clinging on, putting in a good claim for the Westminster 'Charlie off Casualty' Award. He has however had his Big Moment in the Commons. Which was a bit of a let down really. ...

The Unions have been trying to talk some sense into everyone. Meanwhile everyone else is has given up and are now just praying for a ruddy miracle to end this torture and give the country an opposition party.

Angela Eagle is still outside for the 5th day in a row, going "I will stand. Soon. If he doesn't quit" The BBC now qualify for a discount deal at the local Travel Lodge.

We FINALLY know who the fuck Owen Smith is! He's a Welsh MP and sounds like he's not completely away with the political fairies.

George Galloway appears to be trying to make a late bid to be included on the ballot paper for any leadership election.
Bliar's cried. We didn't. Chilcot took over 2 million words to tell us everything we already knew. As well as the fact that Mi6 like Nicholas Cage a lot.

The Cult of Momentum are still worshiping their Dear Leader by sending death threats to PR companies they suspect of disloyalty. Somehow they still manage not to get the title of the most vile pressure group in the UK.

And I suppose I should ask, when will a50 be triggered....? And by whom?

All these questions and more.
Tin foil hats now available upon request

Sense of humour compulsory. No experience necessary though Previous thread 1 Previous thread 2 Previous thread 3 Previous thread 4 Previous thread 5

GingerIvy Thu 07-Jul-16 16:22:58

Were those the actual results???

GingerIvy Thu 07-Jul-16 16:25:59

Red Thank you for that lovely update. grin

GingerIvy Thu 07-Jul-16 16:26:59

TM and AL. <sigh> Mass deportations or unicorns.

Showmethewaytogohome Thu 07-Jul-16 16:30:40

Thanks Red Great intro again

MrsLupo Thu 07-Jul-16 16:33:11

Lovely summary. Thank you Red.

So, the Gove Puppet has bitten the dust. But we're stuck with Andrea the Leaden Heart. It's a soap opera that just won't leave our screens, isn't it. Don't know whether to laugh or cry.

merrymouse Thu 07-Jul-16 16:33:21

So do the party vote now that Gove is out?

GingerIvy Thu 07-Jul-16 16:34:47

It should go out to membership vote on Tuesday now. But my understanding is that they may not vote the same as the MPs and AL has a good shot at winning. Can anyone clarify this please?

LineyReborn Thu 07-Jul-16 16:37:13

We're fucked.

MrsLupo Thu 07-Jul-16 16:40:19

lol at Liney. 5000+ posts and "we're fucked" still just about sums it all up!

GingerIvy Thu 07-Jul-16 16:41:52

At least we're consistent. grin

RedToothBrush Thu 07-Jul-16 16:42:04

We're fucked

Sorry Liney, you've not got that quite right.


DoinItFine Thu 07-Jul-16 16:42:30


We're fucked.

Although we would be just as fucked if it had been the other result.

SugarPlumTree Thu 07-Jul-16 16:44:18

Liney's summary sounds about right to me!

RedToothBrush Thu 07-Jul-16 16:46:49

Membership, are overwhelming MC.
Most in managerial roles.
Most older people.

Polling suggest that
70% want someone with experience.
40% want someone who supported Leave.

All to play for.

It is going to close run in the end I suspect.

RedToothBrush Thu 07-Jul-16 16:49:32

It gets worse.

Theresa May just hired one of the leading Remain campaign managers.

GingerIvy Thu 07-Jul-16 16:50:57

Do you think she's going to do an about face and push for Remain now? I thought she said she would respect the outcome of the referendum.

RedToothBrush Thu 07-Jul-16 16:51:22

Actually, Alison Griffiths has a junior role. May also has Stephen Parkinson, formerly of Vote Leave.

LineyReborn Thu 07-Jul-16 16:52:11

If Andrea Leadsom is voted in by the Conservative membership, we won't just be living through history but will be living through a Matrix-style simulation of history.

The economy run out of a lucky bag.

I guess the Preppers were right, after all.

MrsLupo Thu 07-Jul-16 16:52:26

Middle England will never vote for a PM called Andrea who wears red leather jackets in the House. Just not the thing. wink

RedToothBrush Thu 07-Jul-16 16:53:42

Next move:
If Leadsom's experience and CV is under question then her next move will definitely be to 'build a team' around her.

Step Forward Mr Johnson....

Bloody Chess.

ChardonnayKnickertonSmythe Thu 07-Jul-16 16:54:45

We are fucked.

TheBathroomSink Thu 07-Jul-16 16:58:55

— Gemma Tetlow (@gemmatetlow)
July 7, 2016
Survey by German Chamber of Commerce: 35% of German co.s with branches in UK planning to reduce capital spend; 26% planning to reduce staff

from the Economics Correspondent for the FT

TheBathroomSink Thu 07-Jul-16 17:01:41

Tim Loughton (he of the cringe-inducing march fame) on Loathsome:
"She's the real deal. She's authentic - she has huge competence and goodness knows we're going to need somebody with competence in the difficult challenges ahead," he says.

"She's done all this ... so prime minister? No problem." "She's set up charities delivering life-saving services to vulnerable mums" and had been "the most passionate advocate of the Leave campaign".

"She's exceedingly balanced calm, rational person - she'll have no problem stepping up to that job," he says.

Have a unicorn Tim. Please.

MrsLupo Thu 07-Jul-16 17:04:08

Moving swiftly from one leadership contest to another...

...will the real Owen Jones please stand up?

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now