TTC with a donor

[Waiting2BAMummy]

So it appears I posted the 1,000 message on our previous thread and now it's closed so I've opened us a new home!

@TimeIhadaNameChange
@LanieM87
@Freezerbump

[LanieM87]

Fab! Thanks @Waiting2BAMummy

[TimeIhadaNameChange]

Brill! Thanks, @Waiting2BAMummy!

[Waiting2BAMummy]

This is so my month @TimeIhadaNameChange, not only has my donor agreed to do SMEP....I'm moving.... and now I just went into Tesco and the clearblue digital ovulation kit you sent me the pink sticks for was being sold off with 20 sticks to £6:45!!!!

Bring on the smiley face....

[LanieM87]

That's a fantastic price @Waiting2BAMummy what a bargain! I may have to pop in to my local Tesco so if there's any offers!
Well if I didn't know any better I'd swear I was having ovulation pains today on my L side....

What is my body doing?!! 🙈

[Waiting2BAMummy]

I know @LanieM87 I have been considering getting another box - just in case but then I thought that's not being very positive - although very practical!

I may get another box anyway - I can always pay it forward when I get my 2 lines on a stick at the end of the month.

I think our bodies actually hate us, this is the conclusion I have come to. Don't they know how much stress they are causing?? Are you trying this month? I thought I remembered you saying you were going away so were going to give this month a miss.

On another note I need to rant about my letting agency, I am moving at the end of the month and gave notice on my current property last Tuesday. Today I get this 'I have someone who wants to view that flat on Wednesday afternoon I will accompany the viewing and use my set of keys' from my current agent (copied and pasted word for word). I absolutely understand that they need to find new tenants for the property so they, and the landlord, don't lose money however I think it's a little rude that they haven't even asked if it's okay. I feel like they have deliberately not told me what time the viewing is so that I can't be there. I really hate the thought of people being in my flat when I'm not there, previously the agent went into the property to let in a plumber when the pipes froze and when I came home from work things had been moved (yes I am a little OCD and I know where everything is!!).
I will have a little chuckle to myself though as my living room currently looks like a mothercare outlet so the agent will be trying to figure out if I'm pregnant when I go to hand in my keys!! That said, it should be the end of my TWW by then so I actually might be!

[LanieM87]

This is true! It might add to your karma 😂 @Waiting2BAMummy !

Well I wasn’t planning on it, as I was due to ovulate whilst I was away, however due to the no show period, I’d be due when I get back, so it’s a possibility. I don’t know what to do though, it may be best to see if this month is “normal” and then try in sept.

It is very rude, I’d be annoyed too, I would hate for a stranger to be in my flat, fortunately when I rented mine were always let after I’d gone. Haha have you bought lots of stuff? I’m confident that you will definitely be pregnant at the end of your 2WW, everything is in place for you!

[Waiting2BAMummy]

Bless you @LanieM87 it's a tough decision especially if you're going to pay for another delivery you need to know it's the right time. Maybe, as you say, give yourself this month to get back to normal, especially as you were not planning to try this month anyway.

I have pretty much everything lol Moses basket, car seat, pram, baby bath, clothes, changing bag, nappies, sterilising set with bottles etc. I know most people will probably think I'm mad but this stuff isn't cheap and I wanted to be able to buy things I wanted and not just cheap things because it's all I could afford. I will need to spend my pregnancy saving for my maternity leave so I couldn't do that and buy everything he/she will need so I did that first!

[TimeIhadaNameChange]

That's a great price for the ClearBlue! I am relieved, as I was feeling slightly guilty about sending you something you had to spend money on to use! I think you should buy them all then sell them on eBay - you'd make a fortune! (Else bank them for Karma then send them on free.)

Really pleased your donor is being so helpful - wonderful person!

You are definitely well prepared. The only things I've bought other than a few maternity clothes (inc breast-feeding bras, but they were comfortable for now and cheap) are a few newborn nappy wraps, but that's only because they were cheap. I was going to hire newborn nappies but himself was aghast, so when I saw the wraps I decided they were perfect and I'll just get terrys to go inside.

I do have a cot, load of blankets and a steriliser, plus a few other bits and bobs, but that was only because a friend was emigrating and she gave them to me before she left. I wasn't going to turn them down!

Anyway, really hope this is your month. You deserve it to be!

[LanieM87]

After 39 long days AF has finally arrived! Is it a bit weird I was pleased?!! I can at least wave goodbye to this very odd cycle and hope it doesn't happen again 🙈

[Waiting2BAMummy]

Not weird at all @LanieM87, I felt exactly the same. I knew I wasn't pregnant and felt a huge sense of relief when that cycle was over and I could start concentrating on the next cycle.

[LanieM87]

I've just ordered some new clear blue and one step in preparation. Think I will take this cycle to get back to normal and then try again in September. Think I'll also rejoin coparents and see if there is anyone local who may be willing to help!
Is it next week when your donor will be visiting @Waiting2BAMummy ?

[Waiting2BAMummy]

Where abouts are you @LanieM87? PM me if you don't want to say on here. I still have my subscription to coparents so can do a search for you if you want? See how many there are in your area.

My donor is coming over on Saturday and then should be every other day until my smiley face which should be Monday then he'll do that day and the next 2 days.

[LanieM87]

I will send you a DM @Waiting2BAMummy thank you 😊

Oh wow that seems to have come round really quickly! Absolutely everything crossed for you this month! Have you started packing??

[Waiting2BAMummy]

Yes,l have @LanieM87 someone else is coming to visit the flat tomorrow not, impressed. I can see a lot more of this over the next 3 weeks until I move. I think people get attracted by the price, it's not cheap but it is by camparison to other 2 bed properties in the area but then they come and see the stairs at the rear of the restaurant below and get put off.

I feel like it's been ages since last months attempts but I guess that's because this cycle started a week late. I'm really happy my donor is being so accommodating but it makes me nervous too. I want to try as much as possible to give me the best chance but then I don't want to make him fed up that he doesn't then want to help again next month if it doesn't work.

I'll check my DM and have a look for you.

[LanieM87]

Any sign of a flashing or static smiley yet @Waiting2BAMummy ??

[Waiting2BAMummy]

No, @LanieM87 I was reading some posts last night from several women saying they went straight from blank circle to static. It's hard though as the flashing smiley face is my indication to start testing twice a day but going to start that tomorrow anyway.

I think I started testing too late in my cycle for the estrogen to show a rise as it will have taken my base level as higher than it is if that makes sense.

Donor is coming again tonight anyway I just hope I get my static soon and don't want him to get fed up.

[LanieM87]

I'm one of those women, @Waiting2BAMummy . I've never had a flashing smiley, I go from blank to static and then blank again. I get a sense of when my static is coming by using the IC one step as they do get a bit darker the day before I expect my peak. Apart from last month of course 🙈

I say just keep doing what you're doing! Hopefully your peak won't be too far away!

[Waiting2BAMummy]

I decided to do another test tonight while waiting for my donor and got a flashing smiley @LanieM87! Definitely testing twice a day from now.

He's due to come back on Wednesday anyway but said he'll come tomorrow if I get my static then. I think it's more likely to be Thursday or Friday.

If he comes over Wednesday and then I get my static on Thursday would you do Thursday, Friday and Saturday or just Thursday and Friday. The SMEP says every other day until you get your positive then do that day and the 2 following. What if you had already tried the day before your positive should you still do the 2 days after?

[LanieM87]

Oh good news @Waiting2BAMummy ! Hope your static isn’t too far behind then!
Well i have heard that every other day is better for replinshment if you will! I think you’ve just go to go with what he is willing to do, I wouldn’t worry about the days after peak because I don’t think the sperm has chance to travel to meet the egg properly. So I’d maybe just go one day after peak.
It’s really up to you though!

[Waiting2BAMummy]

No static smiley face yet @LanieM87 donor is coming over again tonight.

I've decided if I get my static the day after he has visited I'll just get him to visit the day of the static and the day after as I really don't think I ovulate 2 days later.

How are you getting on? Have you rejoined co-parents?

How are you doing @TimeIhadaNameChange? Can't be long until your scan now.

[H2OH20Everywhere]

Am keeping my fingers crossed that this time works, @Waiting2BAMummy! You move in what - 2 weeks now? How exciting! And stressful, I'm sure!

@LanieM87 - any luck with finding another donor?

I'm ok. Felt awful yesterday - came into my office and just collapsed on my beanbag for an hour, to the consternation of my office-mate. He does know, and was getting rather concerned about me. It was just low-level pain, tiredness and feeling I was going to faint. Am much better today.

Scan should have been next week, but I put it off to the beginning of next month. The 2nd. Then I'll tell people. It might make me realise it really is happening! Everyone who already knows (DP, mum, office-mate) are desperate to tell people but I'm not. I just really love having it secret. Actually, DP did tell his family (with my blessing) so his ma's already knitting away, as is her wont.

[TimeIhadaNameChange]

Sorry, that above was from me. Have been using a temp NC for a while and forgot to switch back over. Have now done it properly, so am back to being Time everywhere again!

[Waiting2BAMummy]

Bless you @TimeIhadaNameChange sorry you were feeling awful but glad you're feeling better today. Are you excited for your scan?

I know what you mean about the secret thing. I intend to tell my best friend but have no intention of telling anyone else until I HAVE to tell work which I think is at about 25 weeks. Of course I'm not even pregnant yet but I've bought a nice poncho that I can hide in should I need to until I decide to let the cat out of the bag. I'm lucky in the respect that absolutely nobody in my RL knows what I'm doing so I can choose when I tell people but until then it's my secret and I know my friend will be happy to keep it a secret too. She's quite a fusser and won't like it if other people start fussing over me so will be quite happy if other people don't know. She doesn't know it yet but she will be my birthing partner and will come to my scans with me.

It's funny that I've decided all this- actually need to be pregnant first!

Yes, I do move officially 2 weeks today pick up my keys a week on Saturday. I just want it done now, I don't have that much more to pack but as time moves on I'm getting stressed that I'm not ready.

My donor has visited 3 times so far this month but still no sign of a static smiley face. He is coming over again tomorrow which is CD17 so hoping for my positive in the next couple of days. I'm so thankful to him for his effort this month I'm just concerned if it doesn't work he won't be prepared to try so hard again. I also really want it to work this month, for obvious reasons, but also, because then my donor won't know where I live. He's lovely, don't get me wrong, but I'd just rather he didn't know where I live.

I'm so ready for it to be my turn it's been 10 months since I started trying and have actively tried for 7.

[TimeIhadaNameChange]

I'm not really thinking about the scan yet. Too much to do between now and then!

I ended up telling my boss today. I wasn't going to - I wanted to wait and up my hours next month so I'd have enough for SMP and then tell her, but I was feeling guilty about it and DP had told someone who could have let slip, so I bit the bullet. I did try begging her for extra hours though, and told her why, and she seemed more than amenable to the idea. Apparently one colleague is leaving so there'll be hours for the taking anyway. She's very excited about it all which was sweet, but understands why I want to wait til after the scan to go public (only person who does!) so is happy to wait before taking it further.

The other reason I thought I should tell her is that I'm taking the first two weeks of next month off. The scan's on the first Monday. I'd either have to go in especially to tell her, or simply tell her by email which seemed rude. Or wait til I'm next in, which would mean delaying telling everyone else for two weeks (as I'd put it on FB, and even if I didn't I can't trust that someone wouldn't).

Fingers crossed that everything goes well for you this month. Will you let the donor know if you are succesful?

[Waiting2BAMummy]

Yes, @TimeIhadaNameChange, I will tell him I just hope I have something to tell!!

Good luck with the scan, I'm glad your boss took it so well. Mine is going to be a complete bitch once she finds out!