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It appears that 2.8 yr DD lays awake in bed just looking around for 2 hours before going off to sleep - is this ok??

(16 Posts)
BiscuitStuffer Wed 12-Aug-09 20:52:19

I really don't want to keep her up later as she looks shattered at bed time plus I want my evenings!

I have discovered it because we have got her a little touch lamp and she has that on (won't turn it off), so I've been checking regularly and looking through her key hole blush to see if she's asleep so I can pop in and turn it off.

She goes to bed at 7 to 7:30pm ish and wakes at 6:15ish.

She naps in the day 3-4 times per week for up to 2 hours. She can't drop her naps without melt down and asks for them. We tried to knock them on the head thinking it may make her sleep longer but she just couldn't do it.

violeteyes Wed 12-Aug-09 21:08:04

i too worry about this, my ds, 3 today,takes ages to go to sleep at night no matter how tired he seems/how active he's been.

he used to do that lying there thing, and tbh i wonder if he has always done this, as not aware of it when he was tiny.

now he talks/reads(recites)his books or plays with his little cars for about an hour. used to go to bed at 6.30, moved to 7 recently, seems to reduce this period but still awake til 7.45ish no matter what!

he seems happy up there, is resting, it doesn't disturb dd, 13mo in same room. he too naps, 2hours plus most days, usually only takes 5-10 mins to settle. still stays awake on days where nap missed/interrupted so not sure that is reason.

he wakes up between 6 and 6.30-or is woken about then by dd. sleeps through, very active though will say he is tired sometimes-usually means he doesn't want to walk somewhere

i do sometimes worry he isn't getting enough of his sleep at night, but this routine does fit very well with us all and he is a very happy, calm little boy.
maybe like op dd, this is just how they settle themselves-like an adult always having a read or listen to radio in bed?

i do think ds may have always had a long though previously silent zone stage, as a tiny he took ages to fully drop off, even when feeding to sleep, and always used to see his eyes open for about an hour on car journeys begun at bed time etc.

as i say, my concern is that although in bed by 7, not actually sleeping til nearer 8, which i think late for 3. what makes you wonder dd sleep thing may not be okay? the silent thing can be quite unnerving though can't it!

sobeda Wed 12-Aug-09 21:09:16

If your DD is just lying there quietly I would say go with it. My nearly 3 DS (when he doesn't sleep in the day) lies awake for a while, happily chatting about the day until he falls asleep and I just let him be. Over the last 3 months the day time naps have almost stopped and the time he is awake at night pre-sleep has reduced.

LaaDeDa Wed 12-Aug-09 21:20:57

Both of mine do this (they are 4 and 18 months). Not every night and more often only the eldest but quite often they will be happy in their bed/cot for a good hour or more.

They sing hmm, look at books, chat to their toys and just lie there wittering on to themselves.

My youngest will often do this when he wakes up in the morning or from a nap too - i can hear he's awake but he seems happy so in the mornings i leave him til a more reasonable time, ie - not 6.30am wink

I used to feel bad and that i ought to do something about it but i do just think it is their wind down (and for ds wake up) time and they always seem vocal enough when they aren't happy!

SalVolatile Wed 12-Aug-09 21:22:20

Hi, totally normal, please don't worry! DC4 is now 7 and has done this since a baby. Now she reads, listens to music or writes a 'diary' wink but for the baby/toddler years she just lay there, chilling! When she got to about 3 we introduced storytime CDs and these meant she often fell asleep more quickly. I think it is just a case of them winding down grin

SydneyB Wed 12-Aug-09 21:27:35

My DD does this! Only discovered it when we moved DS in there and put the monitor back on as he woke (wakes!) a lot. She witters to herself for at least an hour and sometimes longer. Doesn't do it on days when she grabs her nap in the buggy or doesn't have one at all. Seems to send DS off to sleep too!

PinkTulips Wed 12-Aug-09 21:27:59

Just be gratful she lies there quietly.

dd sings and shouts and kicks the wall to get to sleep... for up to 2 hours angry

ds1 wanders around collecting toys and piling them in his bed, poos his nappy and then falls asleep in random spots, sometimes in bed, sometimes not and not necessarily before i've gotten up to change his shitty nappy. We found him asleep on one of the top steps of the stairs the other night with a stinky nappy.... that would have been a fun a&e trip if he'd rolled off hmm

SydneyB Wed 12-Aug-09 21:30:44

Pinktulips - arf! That is just brilliant. I mean, brilliant-funny. Obviously not brilliant for you. We have DD 'caged' (according to one friend) in giant cotbed..

kateGB Wed 12-Aug-09 21:34:05

My DD1 has always fallen asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. DD2 (19 months) goes to bed at 7 (as does DD1) but is quite happy to play with her teddies and toes for up to an hour before she finally falls asleep.

No matter how tired she is she just likes to 'chill' before going to sleep.

She also wakes up before DD1 (They share a room) but again will entertain herself until someone wakes up.

At weekends I put some books at the end of her cot so often I find DD1 sat on the chair readong and DD2 in her cot either listening to her sister or looking at her own books !

RoseBlossoms Wed 12-Aug-09 21:37:10

my 17mth does this he can be awake singing and chatting to himself for 1-2 hours, even if looks v.tired when putting to bed! If he is quiet as soon as i put him to bed i check on him! He will also upon waking sing and chat until i go in upto about 45mins (longer if i nip in and put some toys in the cot) so i can have a wash get dressed and make his breakfast/ have an extra half hour!

aww i want to go give him a kiss now!!

PinkTulips Wed 12-Aug-09 21:40:57

Sydney, he's 3 and a big lad at that so the cot had to go a while back... he's potty trained during the day for ages but is having poo issues which is grating enough during the day but when i ask him at bedtime 'Will you do a poo in the toilet for me now?' and he answers 'No, I think i'll wait til i'm in bed' i could strangle the little sod darling grin

BiscuitStuffer Wed 12-Aug-09 21:44:11

Phew - good to hear that this is completely normal and that I'm not being mean putting her to bed so 'early'.

She does seem completely happy to go to bed at bed time - maybe I've bullied her in to submission grin.

I will carry on.

How do I know when it's time to drop the day naps? I just tell her that after lunch and rests, we're going to do x,y,z and she always tell me which bears / toy she wants to take to rest with her - will she just say if she doesn't want one?

If I ask her, she will of course say that she doesn't want one, so I don't.

PinkTulips Wed 12-Aug-09 21:46:03

biscuit, we're having to wake ds1 up after about half an hour during the day. If left to it he'd be asleep for 2+ hours but then he's awake all night. If he doesn't get a bit of daytime sleep though he's not a happy chap by 5pm so we let him sleep and wake him after a little while.

sweetkitty Wed 12-Aug-09 21:46:49

DD1 just turned 5 is still awake now and she went to bed at 8.30pm, she reads and plays, DD2 who is in the bunk underneath her is out like a light straight away.

GodzillasBumcheek Wed 12-Aug-09 21:48:29

My DD aged 2.5 does this the other way around. I think she goes to sleep fairly quickly, but nearly every morning she is awake before everyone else nad just lies there looking around and talking to her teddy quietly. She doesn't seem to mind, which is good because if i get any less sleep i am really grumpy all day!

kateGB Wed 12-Aug-09 21:55:08

The day naps will just stop when she's ready to let them go!

DD1 was still having naps for an hour or two in the afternoon until she was about 3 and a half. As a baby she used to have at least an hour in the morning and 2hrs in the afternoon.

If I'm lucky I can still get her to have a nap on a saturday /Sunday afternoon !

DD2 is the opposite. 2 sleeps a day disappeared very quickly. Now she will have a long sleep late morning or early afternoon and will go for an hour or 2.

I dont let her sleep after 3.00 but she runs herown timetable !

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