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To think this is unbelievably shit from the police?

(293 Posts)
TheLostDiadem Mon 01-Mar-21 21:04:33

Six weeks ago my elderly mum had her house burgled while she was asleep upstairs. Not a lot of valuable things were taken as she doesn’t really have much but my (deceased) dad’s medals were taken, her laptop, a box of jewellery belonging to my grandma was taken and her cat was found downstairs with a broken rib where we assume he was kicked (but obviously can’t be certain it was the burglar).

She phoned the local police number and was told to report it online. I came round to do it and help her tidy up and make sure she was ok etc. 48hrs later and still heard nothing from the police so I called them to be told they were incredibly busy and responses can take up to a week. Finally, 8 days after being robbed my mum gets an answer phone message from the police saying they’ve received her report and given her a crime reference number so she can claim on insurance. If she has any further queries she can email them and they’ll get back to her. No enquiry, not welfare check, nothing. Just a crime reference number over a week later.

I live with my dc in the same town. In the garden of my house is an outhouse that is currently being renovated so that when my dm becomes less independent she can live there. It’s nearly finished and has been separated off from my house and has a separate entrance and drive. The electricity had finally been connected last week so last night I decided to do a sleep over there with dc, just for something to do. At 12.15 I was woken up by police hammering on the door. They immediately asked me my address and what I was doing there. I said I lived next door, was sleeping over with dc, had something happened, was dm ok as I assumed something bad had happened. They wouldn’t tell me anything just asked for proof of address. I said it was all next door and they demanded I go and get it. I wasn’t happy leaving dc alone with the police so had to wake them up and drag them over and back again while I got my driving license. It was only then that I realised they thought that I was breaking lockdown rules (very touristy area). I gave them driving license and got a lecture on how we weren’t supposed to leave home unless absolutely necessary, fancying a sleep over wasn’t necessary and I wasn’t to do it again. I asked if it was any different to camping in the garden and was that allowed, what possible harm am I doing sleeping in what is basically a garage and was asked “are you sure you want to do this? You have your children with you and I’m sure you don’t want a scene”. I found this genuinely quite frightening as it was two big, male police officers and I was alone with two young dc. They then left after telling me to make sure I stay at home from now on and that they wouldn’t take further action this time.

TLDR - my mum was burgled and police responded a week later with a crime reference number and nothing else

I slept in the converted garage in the garden with 2dc and was woken in the night by 2 police men to be lectured firmly about lockdown rules.

If I’m not being unreasonable do you think a complaint would be warranted? I’m one of those people who have never really had any dealings with the police and sort of assumed they’d be on my side. Really shocked at what I’ve experienced the 2 times I’ve actually dealt with them though.

OP’s posts: |
Snoozysnoozy Mon 01-Mar-21 21:08:31

Mostly I support the police but stories like these are outrageous. I'd complain in your shoes

UhtredRagnarson Mon 01-Mar-21 21:08:34

Fucking hell! That’s quite disgusting. Threatening you. And yes, that’s exactly what they were doing- threatening you by dangling the suggestion they would upset your children.

Also can’t believe they told an elderly woman whose laptop had been stolen to report her burglary online! hmm

Forevernamechange12333333 Mon 01-Mar-21 21:09:08

If you don’t complain they won’t know how to do it right next time, if might not impact the outcome of things now for you - but would certainly help prevent a similar thing happening in the future!

UhtredRagnarson Mon 01-Mar-21 21:09:19

And please do complain. I’m so angry on your behalf.

Acesulfame Mon 01-Mar-21 21:10:55

Based on the above, your local police need to get their priorities straight.

Sgjudxbyef Mon 01-Mar-21 21:12:58

That's all police do about burglaries - provide a crime number so you can make an insurance claim.

You could complain about their unprofessional conduct when they threatened you, but unless you filmed it the force will protect the officers and basically call you a liar. That's why they were comfortable behaving like that, because they know they'll get away with it.

Sgjudxbyef Mon 01-Mar-21 21:14:03

Forevernamechange12333333

If you don’t complain they won’t know how to do it right next time, if might not impact the outcome of things now for you - but would certainly help prevent a similar thing happening in the future!

It is exceedingly optimistic to think that's how the complaint would be handled.

DoubleTweenQueen Mon 01-Mar-21 21:14:06

That is a truly appalling state of affairs. Love to your mum flowers

LolaSmiles Mon 01-Mar-21 21:14:06

How do they have time to threaten a family for using buildings on their own property but can't support an elderly woman who has been burgled?

The next question is which nosey curtain twitcher decided to call the police because they wouldn't have stumbled across you on their normal rounds?

DaysAreGettingLongerNow Mon 01-Mar-21 21:14:41

Good grief I would complain. They were throwing their weight around. I can’t see how you’ve broken any rules or even the spirit of any rules! The burglar on the other hand......

MadameButterface Mon 01-Mar-21 21:15:42

when you hear about heavy handed lockdown policing, it's usually naice middle-class women like you op, or the two women walking in Derbyshire while holding coffee. meanwhile in the scrotiest areas of my city, gangs of mainly young men are all congregating on street corners all night like it's just normal life, and no one seems to say boo to them. weird huh.

Paul72 Mon 01-Mar-21 21:16:12

If I've got it right you were sleeping in a converted garage on your own property. Are they going to come round and check you are not using your spare bedroom next week. They had no right to enter your property without a good reason and the owner being there is not a good reason.

TheLostDiadem Mon 01-Mar-21 21:16:39

Glad to hear I’m not the only one who thinks it’s shit. shjudxbyef I am worried about being accused of lying and then being investigated further tbh. Particularly irritating as I got a Ring doorbell for the conversion which I haven’t set up yet but which would’ve recorded pretty much all of it.

OP’s posts: |
Champagneandmonstermunch Mon 01-Mar-21 21:16:50

Yes I'd complain, that is not good.

ShrewYou Mon 01-Mar-21 21:18:21

I've only had cause to 'use' the police once in my life and they were spectacularly shit. I'd been brought up to respect the police. Ask a policeman if you are lost. All that jazz. My opinion of them has completely changed.

FOJN Mon 01-Mar-21 21:19:43

I rarely see posts in AIBU where I support the OP's intention to complain but if I'd had your experience I would absolutely be complaining. The intimidating behaviour of the two officers who woke you is completely unacceptable and I would feel pretty annoyed that they can prioritise policing lockdown but not attending a burglary.

I'd be asking for a comprehensive explanation of their conduct.

UhtredRagnarson Mon 01-Mar-21 21:19:54

MadameButterface

when you hear about heavy handed lockdown policing, it's usually naice middle-class women like you op, or the two women walking in Derbyshire while holding coffee. meanwhile in the scrotiest areas of my city, gangs of mainly young men are all congregating on street corners all night like it's just normal life, and no one seems to say boo to them. weird huh.

Yep. Teens are running absolutely wild in our town in this most recent lockdown. Unbelievable amounts of damage being caused everywhere. Police saying they don’t have resources to deal with it. They do however have resources to send two police officers to the home of my single mum friend because she had her parents in her garden to see their grandson on his birthday. hmm

Btw OP based on past experiences I will be recording any future dealings I ever have with the police.

peboh Mon 01-Mar-21 21:22:30

How did someone complain about you breaking lockdown rules if you were in your own garden? That's a bit bizarre.

TokyoSushi Mon 01-Mar-21 21:22:48

Usually I'm in favour of the police, but both of these incidents sound dreadful, I would complain.

rawalpindithelabrador Mon 01-Mar-21 21:23:41

YANBU

MadameButterface Mon 01-Mar-21 21:25:34

I meant to say op, I'm sorry your mum was burgled, and hope she's ok (and the cat). I'm sorry about your dad's medals and grandma's jewellery. really upsetting stuff, pure scumbags.

user143677433 Mon 01-Mar-21 21:26:47

OMFG yes report it!!!!!!!!!!

And write to and phone your MP.

And your local paper.

That’s absolutely ridiculous and has made me so angry.

We’re they essentially implying that they would arrest you if you didn’t just take it on the chin? And that it would have an impact on your children because you were on your own?

TheLostDiadem Mon 01-Mar-21 21:27:07

peboh I think it’s because my house is a corner plot so you access my house from one road and the conversion from the road round the corner. There’s no wall up as yet, it’s just an open drive so I guess people saw the lights on, decided I was a grockle and got straight onto the police. I’d be interested to know whether they were directed to report the ‘crime’ via the website. It clearly got a much quicker response than my mum did despite them saying it would take up to a week for a reply as they were so busy. We’d only been there for about 4 hours before they came knocking!

OP’s posts: |
TheLostDiadem Mon 01-Mar-21 21:29:10

I don’t know what they were suggesting they’d do, just asked if I was sure I wanted to cause a scene in front of my kids confused. I obviously didn’t and I really wasn’t being aggressive or anything, just bewildered that they considered it to not only be against the lockdown regulations but serious enough for them to attend in the middle of the night.

OP’s posts: |

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