We've started our divorce proceedings and all is amicable, so far. No lawyers yet involved.
Money has always been a source of contention in our 10-year marriage.
He always earned much more than I did. His money went more onto property, legal, landlording (when we rented out our home and lived overseas), shares, bonds, holidays, car.
I worked throughout (mostly full time but also for myself at times) and I contributed to all daily life, food, school, child care, nannies, household, and holidays (I paid what I could, sometimes in instalments after, because we went on trips beyond my means that he always choose and I didn't really object to).
I had a full-time job I was really proud of until I had my last baby when I had to quit.
For our divorce settlement, he is asking for a 50/50 split on the profits of selling the house - minus the money he put in to buy the property.
The house situation is this:
He bought the home with the money he earned in his 20s, mostly but not all before we met. When he bought the home we were engaged. It was a year before we married. That was 10 years ago. I was in no position to contribute.
I have lived in the home, paid rent, married while in the home, lived overseas together where I contributed (as above) and the home was rented out. We now have three kids. We came back and have all lived in the home again for a while. We don't now.
So, in short, he wants the £150,000 back that he put in to buy the house.
On sale of the property, we'll hopefully get £450,000 profit.
That means, with his offer, I'll hopefully leave with £150,000 cash for a house for a deposit for me and the kids to live in most of the time. He'll get £300,000. He promises to take care of maintenance above and beyond for the kids financially (he'll be working longer hours while I work for myself and build my new business up and do more childcare.)
What do you think? What would you do?
I've set up a vote:
YABU - to not take this offer. You think what he is saying is fair. I should split profits on the home plus return the £150,000 cash he bought the house with.
YANBU - to not take this offer. I should not agree to this offer and not return £150,000. If you wouldn't take this offer, what do you think is fair and why?
Thank you.
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AIBU?
To return the money to my husband or not?
337 replies
YouCanMakeItIfYouTry · 30/05/2020 22:12
OP posts:
Am I being unreasonable?
1611 votes. Final results.
POLL
You are being unreasonable
20%
You are NOT being unreasonable
80%
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