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AIBU?

Boys in ballet - really fucking annoyed

569 replies

Boyscandoballettoo · 09/01/2020 07:33

Please excuse the ranty tone of this thread - I have just had enough! Took my male toddler to a ballet class, and the number of negative comments or comments laughing about it from so-called family and friends has been overwhelming.

Please can people tell me AIBU to think it’s a bloody unisex sport?!? There have always been male ballet dancers! I do NOT understand the ignorance over it and even if it were a female sport traditionally, how dare people be so bloody sexist and make fun of a boy for joining in.

I don’t know why but it’s really pushing my buttons!

OP posts:
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Am I being unreasonable?

1867 votes. Final results.

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Cantdoleft · 09/01/2020 07:35

Yes boys/men can do ballet.

No people shouldn’t pass comment.

Bit bonkers to be surprised people do though.

It’s not a sport

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Lordfrontpaw · 09/01/2020 07:35

If it’s good enough for Prince George!

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Sparklybaublefest · 09/01/2020 07:36

You need to lighten up,
People will comment, just say the Next Billy Elliot to them

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Welshmaenad · 09/01/2020 07:36

That would drive me insane. My son has taken part in dance since he was small and now at 9 does musical theatre - he's getting really good and has done numerous productions. He's also done some TV work as a result of his connections.

Nobody has, to my knowledge, said a Dann thing about it not being for boys, but if they did they'd get pretty bloody short shrift from me.

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Watermelontea · 09/01/2020 07:37

If men didn’t do ballet most ballets I’ve seen couldn’t be performed. What a load of crap, next time tell them to keep it zipped.

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FreedomfromPE · 09/01/2020 07:37

Don't hold back with these idiots. No matter who they are. They've turned an opportunity into being supportive of your son into a chance to take the piss for cheap laughs.

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stouffer · 09/01/2020 07:37

As long as he chins a posh kid at the audition then it’s fine.

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Boyscandoballettoo · 09/01/2020 07:37

Bit bonkers to be surprised people do though

Why is it bonkers? Would you be surprised if a girl did football and received the same comments?

The sport vs art debate is long standing. if you don’t want to call it a sport, fine, but they are athletes and it’s an exceptionally physically demanding activity.

OP posts:
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doublebarrellednurse · 09/01/2020 07:37

You're surprised by this reaction? Really?

Yes boys can dance. Mine did for years. Don't expect the rest of the world to work to your standards though, not everyone is so enlightened.

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AnneElliott · 09/01/2020 07:37

Ignore them op. Loads of boys do ballet. My DS did it for several years.

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TheGreyInThisCity · 09/01/2020 07:38

Of course it’s a sport Hmm

I can only assume your friends and relatives aren’t really familiar with ballet if they think boys can’t do it. Where else do all the male professional dancers suddenly appear from?!

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Divebar · 09/01/2020 07:38

You need to check out Bad Boys of Ballet on Instagram.to see what superb athletes they are... and get better quality friends.

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Divebar · 09/01/2020 07:39

It’s not a sport it’s an art.

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doublebarrellednurse · 09/01/2020 07:40

I think it's an art as it's not defined as competitive. Sport is.

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Cantdoleft · 09/01/2020 07:41

How is it a sport when you can’t compete and there aren’t fixed rules for how you score points and beat someone else?

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icecreamsundae32 · 09/01/2020 07:41

There are 2 boys in my daughters ballet class, I didn't bat an eyelid, one of them is really really good! Yes there needs to be male dancers to perform shows but I think there will always be some people who will think it's "for girls". If your son enjoys it then that's all that matters.

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PityParty4one · 09/01/2020 07:41

I play rugby and receive comments like this all the time because I am female.

I tend to ignore them as it seems like a reaction is exactly what they are after.

Also its not a sport. It is physically demanding and the dancers train as much as athletes however it is not competitive activity and there is no winning involved. It is an art.

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bingbangbing · 09/01/2020 07:42

Some people are wankers. Just ignore them

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annualleavepurchase · 09/01/2020 07:42

Well it's not a sport.

Yanbu though. It's physically very challenging, great for discipline and of course boys and men do it.

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Waitingforadulthood · 09/01/2020 07:42

Why is it bonkers to be surprised? - because we live in a very sexist society sadly. It's not right but easily predicted.

Another example My 12 daughter gets wolf whistled and lots of male attention. It's sickening and I'm fed up up it- but certainly not surprised

Ignore the sexist twats op. Ballet is a sport and an exceptionally challenging one.

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namechange1041 · 09/01/2020 07:43

I think it's narrow minded for people to make fun of him doing ballet because he is a boy.
Like you said, girls play football, is that weird? No.
I'd say that to people who make comments. "girls play football don't they?"

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Trewser · 09/01/2020 07:44

In the nicest way possible you need to lighten up. My dd played football from aged 5 and I had "she's basically a boy" "do you think she'll be a lesbian" and one charming bunch of parents complaining to the school that dd had taken "their sons" place on the team. She was the only girl for ages.

Dd2 did ballet and there was one boy in her group. He ended up dancing professionally and was basically feted every time he did anything so just smile and laugh and ignore.

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FeedMeTikka · 09/01/2020 07:44

Would you be surprised if a girl did football and received the same comments?

Unfortunately in my experience my girl does receive the same sort of comments - including giggling when she proudly told adults she got a toy garage for her cars one Christmas and full on belly laughter another Christmas when she was excitedly telling people of her new wrestling ring and figures. Also comments from the kids at school along the lines of your can’t play football with us at dinner cos you’re a girl’ etc.

Unfortunately that’s the way of the world, I just taught her from a young age to roll her eyes inwards at others ignorance and gave her some comebacks for when she felt she needed them.

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TheGreyInThisCity · 09/01/2020 07:47

It’s a sport in the way that most people use the word, to mean a physically demanding activity that requires strength and training to do well. That’s not the point of this thread though.

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Newyeardietstartstomorrow · 09/01/2020 07:48

I love how posters have diverted this into an argument of sport vs art! If anyone laughs, shut them down immediately whilst he is young enough not to notice their comments. We went to a ballet over Christmas, and my goodness the muscles those dancers had were amazing. I've never seen someone with a 6 pack on their back before! Check out Ballet Black too.

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