Live with DH who has 3 DSC. Been a SM for 12 years. DSK live with their mum locally. Relatively civilised divorce. I was not the OW and don't have kids.
Good relationship with all 3. They are now in their 20's. They have always popped in and out, stay here a lot and have their own rooms here. Have provided fantastic family holidays and a relatively chilled comfortable life.
Middle child, DSD2 has always been a bit tricky. Apparently since she was born, says DH and those who have known her all her life. She can be incredibly selfish, bossy and demanding of her own way. On the other hand, she is kind and generous. Very emotional and until recently, communicative about the usual stuff. Friends, gossip, boys ect. I thought we had a good relationship.
At the end of February she simply stopped speaking to us and visiting. We had no idea why. I don't when she text DH to tell him when he asked, it was a relatively trivial incident (but clearly not to her) when she felt she hadn't been included in a last minute family event (she was busy and couldn't come). She felt that none of us should have gone without her. To this day she has neither seen us or come to what is, her home.
Her room was a dreadful mess. Really unpleasant but a very lovely room and we don't have a spare room for visitors. I have cleaned and cleared the mess, stripped the bed and aired the room and boxed up the stuff that was just lying around on the floor ect. I haven't emptied the drawers.
DSD is 22. I really would like to clear her room and use it for guests. DH is less than enthusiastic about this idea as its "her room". I think I have respected her privacy and the sanctity of her space for long enough. She has made her position clear.
We still don't know what's really behind her behaviour- we have a great relationship with DSD1 and DSS whose take is that she is being very immature. She has a couple of lovely friends who I see regularly round and about and they tell me that she has also fallen out with and has refused to speak to them and others in the past.
Sorry this is a ramble but AIBU just to draw a line under things and clear her room out and send her stuff back to her?
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AIBU?
To tell my DSD to sling her hook?
173 replies
taxiforme · 15/07/2019 11:51
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