To think that after 3 monkeys bumped their heads, the doctor should just ring social services?

[Soubriquet]

I mean come on, he says no more monkeys jumping on the bed and the mummy still keeps calling the doctor?

Surely she must be an irresponsible parent to let all 5 of her children jump on the bed and hurt themselves?

Dd is watching the bloody nursery rhyme program again

[NicolasFlamel]

[Mooey89]

It's clearly inadequate supervision at least!

[viques]

Her kids, her rules Hun. Shrugs shoulders, peels banana.

[brokenshoes]

My autistic DD was obsessed with that rhyme a year or so ago. She found a version on YouTube with 55 little monkeys 😭

[nobullshitallowed]

@brokenshoes 55 monkeys!!

[AvocadoLovingMamaOfOne]

brokenshoes 55 monkeys??? My head would be turned

[Soubriquet]

55 monkeys?!

Jeez that's a lot of sex!

I would say go and get the snip after 9 at least

[Dragonflycushion]

Where are those monkeys living? You can't get a GP to make house calls for love nor money here.

[Treesinbloom]

My 3 year old adores that rhyme and adds it to everything.

He falls off the sofa? --> "and the Dr says no more falling off the sofa"

He walks into a wall? --> "and the Dr says no more walking into the wall"

[squishysquirmy]

I often change some of the verses to "daddy called the doctor", just to divide the blame up a bit more...

[crazypenguinlady]

[SleepingTiger]

Is this a coded thread about Theresa, Jeremy and Tim?

[Orlantina]

What happened after Jack and Jill went up the hill?

Were there repercussions?

[cjt110]

What happened after Jack and Jill went up the hill?

Were there repercussions?*

And when Humpty fell off the wall....?

[brokenshoes]

Yes, indeed. 55 bloody monkeys. The video lasted about 15 minutes. I was mightily pleased when DD moved on from that particular obsession.

[birdsdestiny]

What the fuck is wind the bobbin about. One of you must know.

[desperatelyseekingcaffeine]

And why is mummy calling the doctor for a bumped head?! She can't be that concerned or she'd stop the others bouncing on the bed.

Oh, and never, never make the mistake of inventing your own version eg 2 little munchkins getting in the bath... Yes it got the 3 year old to actually get in the bath and wash without an argument for a change. But he then insisted every action needed it's own verse! I realised a tantrum was actually less soul destroying.

[Cornettoninja]

Ahhh one of my first parenting discoveries was never start a number rhyme higher than 5.

10 little ducks go swimming one day? Not round here they don't - we're still missing five. Social services don't seem concerned despite the rise in hoisin sauce and pancake wrap sales.....

[snotato]

Birds-i think a bobbin is a cotton reel?

[birdsdestiny]

Thanks sno but what about point to the ceiling point to the floor what does all that mean. At least the monkeys make sense.

[cjt110]

What the fuck is wind the bobbin about. One of you must know. Yes a bobbin is the bit the cotton sits on in a sewing machine.

They're obviously shit at winding it - otherwise why do they keep having to do it. Must be dropping it with all that pointing and clapping hoo haa.

[TiggyD]

I want to know how high the wall that Mr Dumpty sat on was. Maybe that could put a top on to discourage sitting?

And I won't mention the rumour that the Duke of York has had 10,000 men!

[Orlantina]

As an aside, I've used that song teaching subtraction in class. We've varied it and definitely had lots of animated 'monkeys' who love bouncing up and down.!!

[squishysquirmy]

I think the bobbin winding is a cheery work song for child labourers!

[iwasagirlinavillage]

Realistically the doctor's shit anyway. He doesn't seem to do anything medical, he just tells them not to do it again. What kind of training did he do?