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To keep my kids away from chicken pox party?

(246 Posts)
Badgerboop Thu 09-Feb-17 11:06:00

More of a WWYD?

One of my friends is having a kids party tomorrow and both of my children have been invited. I've just found out via Facebook that the birthday girl has got chicken pox in the contagious stage. The mother is not going to postpone the party and it's still going ahead.

Neither of my kids have had it. I wouldn't mind the eldest one catching it as I think she would cope with it but I really don't want my youngest to catch it as she's just getting over a cold, ear and chest infection which has knocked her for 6 and neither of us have had any sleep for the past 5 days!

Shall I just decline the invite or just take them? She's the type of woman who will get funny with me if I decline. I thought about just taking the eldest but if she catches it she will obv pass onto th youngest

PurpleDaisies Thu 09-Feb-17 11:07:05

Definitely decline. Deliberately trying to give your child chicken pox or infect others is irresponsible to say the least.

Badgerboop Thu 09-Feb-17 11:08:06

Thanks purple - I thought I was being abit precious!

Chinnygirl Thu 09-Feb-17 11:08:27

Decline. Her feelings are not your problem.

PurpleDaisies Thu 09-Feb-17 11:09:34

Is the party host telling people about the chicken pox or did you hear it from someone else? It can be really dangerous for some children.

glitterazi Thu 09-Feb-17 11:10:01

Bloody idiot. (Your friend, not you.) I've never got the point of so called chicken pox parties.
How could anyone deliberately make their child ill?! angry
I have a friend who held one of these. I judged harshly from behind my keyboard whilst all the time wanting to tell her not to be so fkn stupid.

xStefx Thu 09-Feb-17 11:10:20

decline, to be honest I cant believe she hasn't postponed it

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Thu 09-Feb-17 11:11:06

FWIW, I wouldn't be taking DD either.

Yes, most children will get chickenpox at some point, but the whole concept of trying to make your own child (or other people's children) ill on purpose is just horrible to me.

While chickenpox is a mild illness for most it really can be nasty sad. Why oh why go out of your way to do that to a child (or anyone)?

Dearlittleflo Thu 09-Feb-17 11:11:08

Definitely don't go. If you want to protect your child against CP in later life, get the jab- don't deliberately infect them. people are such morons.

hearyoume Thu 09-Feb-17 11:11:33

Why on earth would you deliberately expose your children to disease?? I hate pox parties. I feel bad enough when DC fall ill without knowing I could have prevented it.

Sorry but fuck this woman's feelings!!!!!

glitterazi Thu 09-Feb-17 11:11:48

She's the type of woman who will get funny with me if I decline.

So let her "get funny" about it! Definitely her problem, not yours. As parent to your children you're completely within your rights not to want to expose them to chickenpox.

tiggytape Thu 09-Feb-17 11:12:18

Firstly - who cares if she gets "funny"about it - this is about you and your child's health.

Secondly - Chicken Pox is not an entirely mild illness. Most children just get a few itchy spots and feel a bit grotty.
Quite a few though suffer slight additional complications like hundreds of spots of infected spots.
A rare few suffer serious complications including brain swelling to blood poisoning. And a very, very rare few die from the complications of Chicken Pox.

If your children go and are unlucky enough to suffer a complication, you'd never forgive yourself (it is totally different if they catch it later and you haven't had any role in them catching it).

BlahBlahBlahEtc Thu 09-Feb-17 11:14:53

I wouldn't take my kids, if they catch it, fine, But I wouldn't do it on purpose. If she's going to be funny with you because you don't want your kids to be really sick then, sorry, she's a twat. Also is she actually telling people about the pox? Or did you just randomly find out?

Twooter Thu 09-Feb-17 11:14:54

I'm with your friend. I'd far rather get if out the way young. I've had friends kids who have missed holidays and 'fun' weeks at school through getting chicken pox so would far rather they got it out of the way Young at a convenient time for us. However your friend should warn everyone about the chicken pox, although if they're at school together they have probably already been exposed anyway.

glitterazi Thu 09-Feb-17 11:15:35

The thing is, by the time kids hit full time school, they're usually exposed to it anyway.
My eldest caught it when he was 5 at primary school, which automatically meant the 2 year old got it around the same time.
I just can't understand the mentality of deliberately making your child ill or trying to make others ill too.
Chicken pox can pass problem free, but it can sometimes be nasty or have complications. How would you feel knowing you'd deliberately done that to them?

Wolfiefan Thu 09-Feb-17 11:17:51

It's not a case of getting a minor illness out of the way when they are young and it's convenient. confused
It's deliberately exposing your child to an illness that can sometimes have rare and life threatening implications.
Don't go.
I bloody hope this party isn't somewhere public and that all people who are stupid enough to attend are warned about the pox before they attend. Chicken pox can kill immunocompromised people. angry

glitterazi Thu 09-Feb-17 11:20:47

Is the party host telling people about the chicken pox or did you hear it from someone else

This! You say you found out from a Facebook post. Had the mum of the birthday girl told you and others that she had chicken pox or was it just sheer good luck that you saw the post on FB alerting you?
If it's the latter, then your friend is disgraceful. That could be really dangerous for some (ie pregnant parents, or anyone with compromised immune systems)

Badgerboop Thu 09-Feb-17 11:21:31

My eldest and the birthday girl who has CP aren't at school yet. My eldest goes to nursery but they have a strict policy of ensuring kids are symptom free before entering which I suppose is why she has got away with it so far and my youngest isn't at nursery yet.

She has put it on Facebook but I suppose if you aren't on Facebook or friends with her then you wouldn't know! I would have been livid had I of turned up unaware that she had CP

Twooter Thu 09-Feb-17 11:22:54

I'm assuming the OPs dc aren't immunocompromised. Obviously it would be different if they were. However I would probably feel more guilty if they came out with chickenpox the day before their wedding or halfway through their GSCEs or when pregnant or with a newborn knowing that I had helped postpone them catching it earlier.

arethereanyleftatall Thu 09-Feb-17 11:25:00

That is awful of her.
I hate chicken pox parties. Yes, they all have to get it, but the idea of deliberately exposing your child to an illness which could kill them is absurd.

PurpleDaisies Thu 09-Feb-17 11:25:30

There's always one. hmm

twooter it's one thing for children to catch chicken pox naturally. It's quite another to deliberately try to infect them. There's a vaccine now.

MalletsMallets Thu 09-Feb-17 11:25:34

Stupid woman, it can be really dangerous.
I think its much better to get when they are old enough to take all the medication and understand, some kids can be really ill with it. Thats before you take into consideration anyone with a compromised immune system or pregnancy.

Badgerboop Thu 09-Feb-17 11:28:25

mallets my eldest would cope. She would take the meds better etc. But I still don't want to deliberately expose her

glitterazi Thu 09-Feb-17 11:28:47

I'm assuming the OPs dc aren't immunocompromised. Obviously it would be different if they were.

Yes, but how does the party thrower know if everyone else is or isn't? There could be a pregnant mum dropping her child off to the party, or someone who's fighting an illness she knows nothing about.
How could anyone take that risk due to their own wants?

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered Thu 09-Feb-17 11:30:03

YANBU, it's absolutely irresponsible of her to do this - I'd be livid if no-one told me and I turned up (I'm pg and DH has never had CP).

We're planning to get DH and the baby vaccinated, it's £150 each for two shots, and when you think of the alternative (sick, miserable kid, time off work) it's 100% worth it. Is vaccination a possibility for your DC?

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