To keep my kids away from chicken pox party?

[Badgerboop]

More of a WWYD?

One of my friends is having a kids party tomorrow and both of my children have been invited. I've just found out via Facebook that the birthday girl has got chicken pox in the contagious stage. The mother is not going to postpone the party and it's still going ahead.

Neither of my kids have had it. I wouldn't mind the eldest one catching it as I think she would cope with it but I really don't want my youngest to catch it as she's just getting over a cold, ear and chest infection which has knocked her for 6 and neither of us have had any sleep for the past 5 days!

Shall I just decline the invite or just take them? She's the type of woman who will get funny with me if I decline. I thought about just taking the eldest but if she catches it she will obv pass onto th youngest

I had an awful time with it. I think I was about 12 and was very healthy normally. I ended up being taken to hospital one night as my temperature was so high that I was hallucinating. The spots were awful and I had them on mucous membranes including my vagina :( Several got infected and the scars remained for several years. I was off school for 2 weeks. When I went back I was accused of swinging the lead because most kids were only off for 5 days.

Tuna If it's any consolation your DDs scars will most probably fade and disappear, mine did.

The CP jab is £100 FFS. If you didn't get it and your child got CP and died, the £100 saved wouldn't look such good value. let alone deliberately exposing your child to it! Only a moron would do that.

The NHS website isn't terribly truthful and certainly not based on the best and most recent evidence.

My understanding is that it's a combination of short-term cost combined with a fear that if another vaccine was added to the schedule, it would risk driving down vaccine rates further.

Given that it's recommended that over-70s are vaccinated against shingles, and there is currently a programme to do so, and CP vaccine would over time massively reduce rates of shingles, it's not an argument that holds much water - even if there were evidence that it's a problem. Which there isn't.

I contracted chicken pox when I was two. I got numerous skin infections, had problems breathing from a lung infection and was hospitalised for several weeks.
It is not something to be taken lightly.

i would decline as i know how dangerous chicken pox can be. my four year old nephew had a stroke after getting chicken pox.

How could she possibly be funny with you for not wanting to make your children ill?! Especially if they're just getting over something else. I used to think people getting the vaccine were being a bit precious but if I had a third DC I'd do it; mine were so ill, it was horrible. They had it at 3 and 1 (DS's spots appeared on his first birthday poor love!) and were absolutely covered in spots - 50ish each on their scalps alone, in their ears, inside their mouths so they couldn't eat, in their bottoms, on the soles of their feet... utterly grim. Neither of them slept for a week and they just felt miserable. And that's not even with any complications or infections - just a nasty but normal dose.

The pregnancy thing's a bit of a false alarm though - if a pregnant woman's had chicken pox herself her baby's not at any risk through exposure to other people with it.

Minty yes sort of. That assumes the pregnant woman knows the child has cp, knows whether she's had cp and isn't one of those people who get it twice.

Can't - sorry if I was grumpy but I hate it when misinformation about vaccines abounds.... it's a pet peeve (largely because I know a few immunocompromised people who are dear to me so the unbelievably selfish attitude of the Mum holding the party in the OP really annoys me).

I think the NHS is pretty bad in the information it provides - it says on it's website that one vaccine is 90% effective but then just says it's 'higher' with two doses (why not give figures? Because people would question why it isn't offered on the NHS?). Then the reasons for not giving it to children I find highly dubious - why is it given in the US then?. I think it's much more likely a cost issue. Cost along with a reduction in the rates of disease is also why they've stopped giving the Men C vaccine at 8 weeks now and also why they stopped the BCG vaccination against TB. TB is now on the rise again in this country. I get there's only limited money but I know people who've died from TB.

I'm feeling pretty fed up after watching 'Hospital' on BBC 2 last week and seeing the health tourists. I'm not saying we shouldn't treat these people but they all had bloody smartphones (which I don't have - on the basis of cost) and seemed to manage the flight cost to come to the Uk which must have been significant. I get they can't afford the full bills but the fact that they haven't even given a few £100s towards their treatment (or indeed paid the few 100 quid for travel insurance) is pretty shoddy and shows we're being taken for a massive ride - and it is a question of this money meaning other peoples' lives are at stakes. I think they said health tourists cost the NHS £450million - how many vaccines would that buy to protect people from potentially life threatening illnesses? Tourists should not be allowed in without travel insurance (obvs this doesn't apply to refugees). OK - massive rant off topic over... I don't know what's come over me...

I had chicken pox every where including inside my vagina! It was agony. I was maybe 5/6 years old.

Decline! There is no way I would send my dc to that party, I kept my son home last week as two of the kids in his childminders have chicken pox, it's one thing if they happen to catch them, but it's mad the people who almost boast about happily exposing their kids to chicken pox to "get them over with" you're dead right op

I think another (relatively short term) cost for routine chicken pox vaccination is that it would probably require more routine shingles vaccination for a while: one of the things that apparently stops you getting shingles is being repeatedly exposed to wild chicken pox, so if there's less of it around there's more likelihood of older people who had chicken pox as children coming down with shingles. Obviously once fewer people are getting the virus in the first place, then fewer people will be at risk of shingles in later life, but until then...

I got the DC vaxxed privately - DS2 in particular had eczema, which is a risk factor for getting infected spots/complications.

(I am one of the lucky people who developed immunity to chicken pox without having any symptoms at all, but I'm not betting on the kids having inherited that particular superpower).

leedy, thinking about the eczema / chickenpox - it was not clear whether or not I had chickenpox as a child, because my eczema was so bad that it was impossible to tell whether I had spots.... I get the weird fluid-filled under skin blister, followed by intense itching and oozing, type of eczema, which is obviously closer in appearance to chicken pox, and yes, did regularly get infected.

Apparently - test in pregnancy - yes, I have had it!

Its Russian roulette for kids!

For some people chickenpox can be not only dangerous but actually lethal. Some countries choose to vaccinate against it as they recognise the dangers. It is highly contagious so very likely others will catch it at the party.

What other dangerous games are they going to play at this party? Blind folded crossing the road? See who can take the sweets off a mouse trap!

Of course you should stay away now you know, as to do otherwise would be irresponsible. Beggars belief that the party holder would still go ahead with the party knowing the impact this virus could have on others.

Oh I would definitely decline, she's very foolish and I hope has been honest with all the party invitees!

I haven't vaccinated my kids because I was worried about the effectiveness wearing off and them getting it as adults. I know people who have had it as adults and it was fucking awful.

My two kids have just had it. My 18 month old got it first and I would say she didn't get it too badly, but it was still savage and very uncomfortable for her, she hardly slept for days! My 4 year old got it from her and it appeared 2 weeks later - it was incredibly mild. Probably max 30 spots and he didn't feel at all unwell. So you never know how your kids will react, so I would never deliberately expose them.

That said I am glad mine have got it over and done with!

Apsalutey don't go - however, my parents kept me away from everyone with chicken pox and somehow after 37 years I still haven't had it. I was tested when pregnant and I have no natural immunity so I will get it one day and it will be awful apparently

I'd decline but if she's seen her in the week before spots she may well have caught it anyway, I was at a party before Christmas where 2 kids got spots the day after the party every child that hadn't already had it got it in the 3 weeks after!!

As long as everyone is warned the birthday child has the pox then it's entirely up to individual parents if they wish to attend. The party itself is not U but "going funny" if you choose not to go totally would be

OP, have you any idea how many people have rejected the invitation? Just wondered if the mum would see sense (as I see it) and postpone it if enough children drop out.

My eldest is perfectly healthy with no underlying health conditions. When she was 3 she got a horrendous case of chichen pox, she must have had a thousand spots which then got infected. She spent 2 days in agony, asking for cuddles as she felt so poorly then screaming when I touched her as it caused her so much pain. I couldn't use anything on her spots to stop them itching as it caused her too much pain. A year on she is still covered in scars all over her face and body. I know that chances are she would have got it at some point but I would never have forgiven myself if I had done anything to cause it.

Rachmolly80 I didn't get it until I was 30, it was not as bad as I had expected, tbh. I'm keeping my kids away from it, and thinking about the vaccine as an option.

So glad I've had youngest ds vaccinated against CP, particularly after seeing his older brother become very ill from infected spots in his eczema
Our GP says the reasons it's not part of the NHS vaccination program is
A. Cost
B. Fear that parents will rebel against another vaccine and rates of vaccination will fall again.

The argument about shingles is a weak one.

To be fair - is this being billed as a 'chicken pox' party, or is it just unfortunate coincidence that the birthday girl has got CP just before her party? This happened to us when my daughter was 4 or 5 and woke up on the morning of her party covered in spots. I rang all the guests' parents and offered them the choice of whether to attend or not - about half the children had had CP already. All attended except one child (and her Mum thought I'd said it was German Measles!). One friend came with her own set of spots. A good time was had by all (although my daughter got a bit grumpy late in the day) and not one kid caught CP. I won't play down the fact that CP can be a miserable experience but to many children it's hardly noticeable. To be clear, a child is only contagious before the spots show up (so impossible to tell) and whilst the spots are still 'wet'. They dry up pretty quickly. And as far as the new 'vaccine' goes, it costs a lot and is not 100% proven plus there is some concern that it can initiate shingles. I worked for a Paediatrician and CP is not considered to be a serious illness except in babies, pregnant women (who haven't had CP) and the immune suppressed. So - Badgerboop - you'd be quite right to keep both your children away from this party. But if they were both well I'd say go ahead. It is better to get it at some point in childhood - much worse as an adult.

I think these are fucking nuts.

DD is coming to the end of a relatively mild case and it has still been awful.

Brutal idea.