I'm a tarantula AMA (selfie included)

[charabanctrip]

My name is Albie, feel free to ask me any questions

Were you once in a boy band? I’m sure I’ve seen you before.

Hi Albie,

Do all the 'ooh a spider you must burn your house to the ground' comments on MN bore your spidery tits off?

Just how weird do humans look?

You look soft and fuzzy. Are you soft and fuzzy or will you eat me?

I don't want my house to be burned down it is sad that humans are scared of us.

you are very cute Albie!
are you ticklish?
do you like to be tickled?
what's your favourite biscuit?😉

I take great pride in being soft and fuzzy, but my fuzz comes out and can irritate human skin so it looks nicer than it is. I use it to defend myself by kicking the fuzz onto my enemies and they then run away screaming

Humans look weird and you only have two eyes whereas I have eight 👀👀👀👀

What do flies taste like?

My favourite biscuits are cricket flavoured cookies and I'm not ticklish. My mum gets me to move along by tickling my bottom with a paintbrush, but I find this to be undignified and I'd sooner she didn't do it

🤣 at paintbrush nudging

Flies are too small for me so I eat crickets. They're crunchy on the outside and soft on the inside. They taste a bit like prawns. It takes me a long time to eat a cricket because I don't have any teeth.

do you rub your willy on wet clothes that are left outside to dry after dark?

What do you think is a good rental fee to allow spiders to live in my house? What about the shed?

And is it acceptable to evict those who refuse to pay?

(I'm jealous of your human for having such a fascinating pet... or is the human your pet?)

Here's another selfie.

I have a Samsung

@ZingDramaQueenOfSheeba
No question but you are very handsome!

Here

I don't have a willy because I'm a girl

Spiders should always be allowed to live where we like because we're amazing and awesome

do you rub your willy on wet clothes that are left outside to dry after dark?

I wanted to ask that one

Why are you called Albie? Is it short for Albert?

How fast can you run?

Why do you need 8 legs you ugly little ?

Is it true you taste through your feet? If so what’s the strangest thing you’ve tasted on your humans hand??

Spiders don't have willies. The boy spiders get us pregnant by rubbing our tummys with their hands

If we're hungry we eat them afterwards.

Hi Albie! What happens when your people go on holiday? Do you have a spider-sitter?