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Original poster

Oh help help help - I made a suggestion about something we should do to my boss at work - he liked the suggestion but most of my colleagues hate it and now they are peeved with me and I just feel really small and stupid

90 replies

SixSpotBurnet · 17/09/2008 12:48

Help help help.

Have been in new job since January. I joined an existing team which had had a bit of a shake-up and in particular had its reporting lines changed etc.

We have been doing various team-building exercises which to be honest I quite enjoyed and I suggested to my boss that perhaps we could have a full day, off-site (budget permitting) in about six months time to review what we'd done, do some training etc. We used to do this at my old firm and they were quite popular.

Anyway, four of my colleagues have kind of rounded on me out of earshot of boss and basically expressed their disapproval of the idea and instructed me "not to spring any more suggestions like this on them without advance warning".

I feel really small and stupid now, and don't quite know what to do. Anyone got any bright ideas?

OP posts:
Original poster
SixSpotBurnet · 17/09/2008 13:07

bump - come and talk to me somebody!

OP posts:
Miyazaki · 17/09/2008 13:08

Bugger it. They don't pay your wages. Tall poppies and all that.

RubySlippers · 17/09/2008 13:08

are you abseilling down rocks?

that is my idea of hell, although team building per se is not a bad thing

Miyazaki · 17/09/2008 13:09

altho if they are v entrenched like that, and you have to work closely with them, I would email your boss in the future, or do it in your 1-2-1s, he is bound to take credit for your ideas so they won't know it's come from you...

RandomFlopsy · 17/09/2008 13:10

Don't worry about it. They are jealous because you are showing them up for being lazy and lacking in initiative.

But do check under your desk for horses' heads...

MmeLindt · 17/09/2008 13:10

Ignore them, if they were so against it they should have said something right away rather than bitching at you later. Sounds like you made a good suggestion.

Miyazaki
What does tall poppies mean?

Miyazaki · 17/09/2008 13:10

omg - have just realised I put HE and no mention that your boss is a man. ERGH!

Chequers · 17/09/2008 13:11

Oh, we do these at work all the time. I hate them, wouldn't take it out on you though unless it was your idea. Oh, hang on....

No really, they'll get over it. Perhaps you should make anonymous suggestions in the future though.

Lazycow · 17/09/2008 13:11

Well frankly your colleagues sound a bit off to me. What you have suggested seems fine. Maybe there are some office politics you are unaware of or maybe your colleagues just aren't enjoying the team building exercises.

Do you know why they object to the idea?

HaventSleptForAYear · 17/09/2008 13:12

Ahh. It's a horrible feeling isn't it?

I think miyazaki's suggestion about 1 2 1 with boss is good.

Especially from now on because they'll probably all think you're a smart-arse (sorry, this has happened to me and it was nasty.)

Don't think you can really do anything about what's happened, just try and move on.

Original poster
SixSpotBurnet · 17/09/2008 13:12

I did email him, but then he mentioned it in a meeting with all of us, and said it had been my suggestion.

(Boss is a man, yes.)

Lol at checking under desk for horses' heads!

OP posts:
Miyazaki · 17/09/2008 13:12

I wiki'ed Tall Poppy

bundle · 17/09/2008 13:13

weirderama

they sound jealous to me

ParCark · 17/09/2008 13:13

Message withdrawn

CapricaSix · 17/09/2008 13:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MmeLindt · 17/09/2008 13:15

Miyazaki
Thanks, have never heard of that before.

SuperSillyus · 17/09/2008 13:15

Well I would think it was great fun and a good idea, I wonder why they are so reluctant?
I don't think you should feel small or stupid. Sounds like your colleagues have some sort of problem with the boss? Maybe the boss isn't great at discussing things with them so they discuss first before involving him?

hecate · 17/09/2008 13:15

oh god, it's not those terrible 'team building' days is it? Most people loathe those!

Original poster
SixSpotBurnet · 17/09/2008 13:16

I think they object because they think they have enough real work to do without doing extra stuff as well. And so do I, tbh, but I think you have to be outward-looking at least some of the time and not just sit in your own little bunker all the time.

I was going to volunteer to organise it, though, so it wouldn't be extra work really for anyone else but me - just a day out of the office.

Glad I'm not the only one it's happened to, though!

I am not very good at dealing with people not liking me - pathetic I know.

OP posts:
Original poster
SixSpotBurnet · 17/09/2008 13:16

ROFL CapricaSix! Most definitely not!

OP posts:
SammyK · 17/09/2008 13:18

Urgh I hate these kind of things!

Not your fault tho, I definately wouldn't have held it against you!

Chequers · 17/09/2008 13:18

Wouldn't call it tall poppy syndrome, it's not like the OP has actually invented the concept of teambuilding days.

They're pissed off because they don't want to do it, not because they didn't think of it first.

Miyazaki · 17/09/2008 13:19

It's a big thing to get over at work, but it really doesn't matter if they like you or not, presumably they are professional enough to work in the same way. I don't think men worry as much about being liked at work... I regularly have to give myself a good slapping about the whole like-me-like-me thing. It's a hard one!

Cappuccino · 17/09/2008 13:19

what miserable feckers they are

I love days out

there are usually good biscuits

we went for a walk round a lake once

Original poster
SixSpotBurnet · 17/09/2008 13:20

No, I wasn't trying to assume a higher social position, honest!

OP posts: