Nuerodiverse colleague

[moana35]

I am having a few problems with a colleague at work. She is neurodiverse so adjustments have had to be made but these adjustments are meaning that myself and my colleagues are doing alot more than we did before she was employed.

She is very black and white about time so she will not be at her desk until her digital smart watch says the start time on her contract and again she leaves at the exact time she is supposed to finish even if in the middle of something. Lunch is an hour but due to needing to re compress for the afternoon she needs to take 75 minutes as she needs to go for a walk and eat. She has to sit in front of a window which means all our places in the office have been changed.

From Monday we are not allowed to drink coffee at our desks anymore only tea as the smell makes her gag.

Aside from this she is a very good worker and gets her work done to a good standard but it is impacting on the morale of the team. She is also exempt from training mornings if they are "small room " based as she can't sit in a room with a big group of people. She will be allowed to do her training online.

Management say as she declared her nuerodiversity at interview these adjustments have to be made for her I get reasonable adjustments and I have an autistic son but are these adjustments reasonable to the rest of the team.

If we took 15 mins extra for lunch or asked our colleague to not drink coffee I am sure we would be spoken to by management,

Has anyone else come across this in the workplace.

And we wonder why people like this don’t get jobs! Small employers would hate to upset staff by moving desks around and telling them they couldn’t have coffee at their desks. Only big employers entertain this and don’t care much about existing employees.

The you find a compromise. A cup with a lid may work. Or have it away from your desk.

It's nice to hear of an employer that actually implements reasonable adjustments. The only one I asked for is written communication, but it never actually happens.

The coffee thing is ridiculous.

But the rest isn't that bad.

I have adjustments but mine do not impact on anyone. I have the same workload, I just do it in a way that works for me and I excel at my job. I have been there 20 years and it was a late diagnosis. My colleagues are very supportive of me and I don't have any requests or adjustments suggested by management, that impact on them. If anything, some of my adjustments made are a little too rigid I find. My colleagues get to pick and choose their hours but I'm not allowed as they want me to have a routine. It is what it is.

I would speak to your manager about the coffee thing. Ask for some help during the extra calls time. The rest, just leave her alone.

I have narcolepsy. Some people with narcolepsy rely on coffee to get through the day (doesn’t work for me though).
How would it work if this lady was in the office with a narcoleptic who relies on coffee to stay awake? Who trumps who?

This is where we are headed and it does concern me.
Things like access for wheelchair users (bigger desk area, for instance) is absolutely reasonable. An ND person wanting to sit nearer the door in busy whole staff meetings, fine.
But demanding people don’t drink coffee at their desks is unreasonable. A reasonable request would be asking if people would mind drinking out of lidded cups where possible.

For the love of fuck, an aversion to the smell of coffee, however intense, is not comparable to a potentially fatal allergy. Come on.

In my workplace my colleagues eat all kinds of different often strong smelling foods and drink coffee by the gallon , a couple of them would be considered n.d but everyone politely accepts each other and their(sometimes smelly) choices and we all rub along together.
I am beginning to lose respect for situations such as o.p's where the vast majority have to change their actions and behaviours to suit a tiny minority ,in this case just one person.
If the person was repulsed by water would the team be expected not to drink it ?
It's not only the n.t people who should be expected to compromise.

Her working hours, pay and output are none of your business.

If you have an issue with your working hours, your pay or your workload, then you raise thst with your manager. She isn't the problem.

As for the coffee, many workplaces have a rule that you can only drink at your desk from cups with a secure lid, to reduce potential spillages that might damage equipment.

You could suggest that as a compromise. It's a very small gesture that would allow this person more comfort while they work.

OP,

What would your attitude be if your colleague had a visible disability, eg visually/hearing impaired, required mobility aids, etc.? I'm sure you'd be more sympathetic.

Your company might even put it on their publicity materials.

I know plenty of people who work their hours and not a minute more.

You mean neurodivergent.

You say she’s good at her job and works hard but yet she’s made your workload increase - how?

The coffee thing is unfair on the team. The rest I think are reasonable.

Exactly.

We actually have a ban on anything containing nuts being eaten in the office because someone has an extremely severe allergy. While, yes, it can be a pain I’m happy to forego eating nuts because I don’t want to kill someone.

I’m not stopping drinking coffee because someone doesn’t like the smell. That person needs to manage her own aversions.

This, the argument seems to be ‘you not being able to drink coffee doesn’t matter and shouldn’t affect you. Her wanting to control you drinking coffee is of upmost importance and absolutely should absolutely be upheld’..

the coffee is very unfair
the timing - obviously that gets everyone's backs up.

I need coffee to help me through the morning and I'm ND. Don't take my coffee lol.

But I've had colleagues come in with strong spray and it's overbearing. Not only does it hurt my sensory issues, I have sinusitis ao it hurts. But I don't complain. I just open a window. Its not worth it.

Yeah, as in helping each other be being kind and supportive.

Anyone who didn’t want to be like that was free to leave.

i have drunk coffee/tea at my desk for 40 years and only once did i spill it

I work in retail, the only delicate thing at the moment is our staff morale in the run up to Christmas. I don’t know why it’s a thing, I think one manager couldn’t cope with the mess from people eating and drinking at their desks and stopped it. He used to say that’s why we have a staff room and to use that and checkout staff don’t eat and drink at their work station so we are no different, couldn’t really argue with him about the checkout staff bit so that’s why it’s always stuck.

I think that decent people want to get on with their colleagues so they try to find a compromise. Most people don’t need to drink coffee, but if they do, see what compromise can be reached.

It's actually illegal to prevent people drinking, unless its a lab or there are hazardous materials

Doesn’t sound like the colleague insisting her colleagues don’t drink coffee is making many compromises.

This is the disabled person's equivalent of women saying "I'm not like the other girls" and "I don't see why women should get maternity leave". The normies won't respect you for disowning your legal rights and you stab the rest of us in the back.

1. Struggling daily to cope with situations that other people find easy is no way to live.
2. Not all of us can "find a way to get by". I can't "find a way to get by" when the office lights give me a migraine and the aura means that I literally cannot see the monitor. The reasonable adjustments exist in law for that reason.

I can't imagine that the person who lost their window seat is very happy.

I'd say most of those adjustments are reasonable. Some of them are just enforcing reasonable boundaries - I'm not sure why she would be unreasonable to work the hours she's contracted to work.

Regarding the coffee thing, I would speak to your manager and see whether a compromise can be reached. Lidded cups might solve the problem for instance. We all use them at work and although I'm quite sensitive to smells and only drink tea myself, I can't smell other people's coffee. I have this as it keeps my tea warm for ages - YETI Rambler® 14 oz (414 ml) Stackable Mug – YETI UK LIMITED.

Her adjustments all seem fair aside from the coffee that's totally unreasonable

Having it away from the desk would decrease work productivity. A lidded cup would be a good compromise but what if the other worker says that she doesn’t like the smell of coffee in lidded cups either? The other adjustments are reasonable, but do you really think the coffee one is? No coffee for anyone ever, because this lady doesn’t like the smell?