Nuerodiverse colleague

[moana35]

I am having a few problems with a colleague at work. She is neurodiverse so adjustments have had to be made but these adjustments are meaning that myself and my colleagues are doing alot more than we did before she was employed.

She is very black and white about time so she will not be at her desk until her digital smart watch says the start time on her contract and again she leaves at the exact time she is supposed to finish even if in the middle of something. Lunch is an hour but due to needing to re compress for the afternoon she needs to take 75 minutes as she needs to go for a walk and eat. She has to sit in front of a window which means all our places in the office have been changed.

From Monday we are not allowed to drink coffee at our desks anymore only tea as the smell makes her gag.

Aside from this she is a very good worker and gets her work done to a good standard but it is impacting on the morale of the team. She is also exempt from training mornings if they are "small room " based as she can't sit in a room with a big group of people. She will be allowed to do her training online.

Management say as she declared her nuerodiversity at interview these adjustments have to be made for her I get reasonable adjustments and I have an autistic son but are these adjustments reasonable to the rest of the team.

If we took 15 mins extra for lunch or asked our colleague to not drink coffee I am sure we would be spoken to by management,

Has anyone else come across this in the workplace.

Significant anxiety with presenting.

What extra work? The new colleague is an addition to the team. Surely that means the 15 mins extra she has for lunch, they're in fact covering the exact same work load they did before she came along, plus they then have less work to do for the other multiple hours she's there with them as it's now spread among 4 instead of 3 or whatever. .

I can see your frustration with not being allowed special treatment.

However, those of us with a disability have adaptations to put us on a level playing field not to give us an advantage. Big difference.

I would rather not be autistic. Instead I am, so as a reasonable adjustment I have a quiet room so I don't have to take my break in a social area at work where I'm expected to socialise. This avoids social burnout so I can avoid being on benefits and still do the same job as everyone else there.

Autistic burnout/meltdown is an extremely distressing reaction I'd rather not have at work.

The team of professionals who diagnosed me believe I have a significant disability. So you are wrong I am afraid. It's not the same as "everyone struggles a bit".

So they have anxiety then. Pretty simple to be diagnosed with it, get a GP letter, get the occupational health person to write a recommendation, reasonable adjustment sorted.

Any other questions?

@SirChenjins So she only gets anxious about presentations, nothing else? Fair enough, that’s a skill that she can work on then.

One, I sit in my office and I work whilst my colleagues chat about football, holidays, family, etc during working hours. I go to assist people and they are browsing Amazon. Plenty of people piss time up the wall at work, but it doesn't look like a lunch break so they think it doesn't count as a break.

Two, it makes no practical difference to OP how much time this extra break adds up to over the next five years. The employer accepts it and it's the employer's decision, not OP's. Whether the autistic colleague is paid for the time or docked it is between the colleague and the employer. At my place, we have people on four-day weeks as reasonable adjustments, and what their pay check says is none of my business. The only reason I would have to complain is if them being off work one day per week were to materially affect my ability to do my job.

For a bunch of people complaining about disabled people telling you how to live your lives, you sure fail to see the hypocrisy inherent in trying to dictate to the disabled person how she should live hers.

It doesn't work like that - did you not know that?

No questions for you.

Yes, she has no choice but to work on it. Her colleague has no such difficulties, but if she decided she couldn't present then her diagnosis would support her request.

’everyone struggles a bit’

My Audhd dd had severe burnout. Wouldn’t go to school, hid in her room, exhausted and self harming.

It took 5 years to recover from. She’s 19 now and just starting to build a life.

Diagnosis was from the ND team at the children’s hospital.

Yeah, everyone struggles a bit. Not to the point where too much interaction causes severe disability for 5 years though. If only it was that easy.

Ignorant comment.

It literally does work like that, having done that same process myself before I had my formal autism diagnosis.

Also, not to be pedantic, you did just ask me a question.

Yes, I see this from my own lense as a ND person. I have been diagnosed by a medical professional with this disability and live with it every day. I did not ask for it. It does not make me feel superior. I don't take fucking pleasure in my deficits.

Why do you feel the need to shit on reasonable adjustments. I will ask this question again on this thread. Do you feel this way about physical disabilities? How is it different?

I feel for her. My DS (17) recently had a panic attack while giving a presentation in class. He cried afterwards and I had a call from the school to pick him up. 😕

He had to do another presentation this week, he wrote himself a detailed script and it went better. Presenting can be really difficult for some people.

It literally doesn't.

I said no questions for you in response to your question. You weren't being pedantic, you misunderstood my reply.

I'm glad you have been able to get those adjustments. They don't require anyone to act differently though and change their daily habits. Big difference.

On the level playing field: this is really something only ND believe. I see what you mean in a sense that you get to do your work equally well according to your needs. But I think you know nothing is level.

And yet we wonder why the employment rate for those with autism is only 31%.... 🤔🙄🤦🏼‍♀️

We seem to be stuck between the attitude of "autistic people shouldn't be on benefits and should work like everyone else" but also "I hate we have to make reasonable adjustments to enable autistic people to work"

Can't really have it both ways. Especially as the government is hell bent on forcing everyone back to work. If employers don't make these accomodations that enable people to work...shock horror..they aren't going to be..able to work.

I'm not sure why she needs 15mins extra lunch. 1hr is plenty for eating and walking. I think she's taking the mick. What if someone else prefers a window? A lot of this is nothing to do with autism. A lit of autistic people like or prefer something but don't demand it. Her demands are just brattish entitlement. I don't like certain food smells but I would not dream of asking colleagues not to eat them.

I really feel for your son, I hope he's ok now and that 's good he had a better one this week. It's an awful fear to have, especially when your role requires it and it's not always something that can be prepared for by writing it in advance. Unfortunately for DD, her colleague who has no difficulty in presenting was quite unkind to her afterwards, which made her feel really crappy.

I think you’re really wrong about this. If you want to provide unpaid labour that’s disadvantaging you and advantaging your employers that’s up to you, but you may as well be handing them £30 a week every week for the privilege of spending less time with your family or doing what you’d like to do. Your colleague is right to be precise in time. If her outputs are the same or better then let her get on with it.

It does seem unfair. What if someone else said they needed more time? If I needed a walk, I'd fit it in within the time. Some of my colleagues prefer to be alone at breaks but they don't require special arrangements. They just go.out or find a quiet space.

You two twisting words. Nobody said everyone struggles a bit. People are saying you don't know how severe each person perceives their struggles. Some struggle so much they commit suicide and yet nobody saw it coming. Just because something doesn't seem as much of a struggle to you doesn't mean isnt a massive struggle for them. Yes, even when they are NT.

I will be honest and say, I have no problems with any of the adjustments, whether it's the window spot, the extra time, or the being absent at in person meetings. 😇
All more than reasonable modifications, to make work-life better for this colleague. 👍

But.....NO FUCKING COFFEE IS A DEAL BREAKER!
It would be different if she was allergic (like those with a nut allergy etc), otherwise FUCK THAT MATE, I NEED MY MORNING NESCAFE 😭 😭 😭 SPEAK TO YOUR BOSS. I would be incandescent over that issue personally.
But only that issue alone.