Dismissed while pregnant - employer using an old resignation letter

[Kipdfgy]

Hi all,
I’m 11 weeks pregnant and really shaken by what's just happened at work. I’ve been with the company (a small family-run business) for 4 years in a managerial role. After I told them about my pregnancy, they immediately started pressuring me to return just 2 months after giving birth and to go full-time by April 2026. They also asked me to arrange all antenatal appointments on specific days to “minimise disruption,” even though these are set by the NHS.

Earlier this week, after another day of being criticised and overhearing my boss complain about me on the phone to my colleague (again! FYI they have been keeping a secret document of all my mistakes, which I found out about. They have never formally addressed these with me), I had an emotional outburst and left work early. In the heat of the moment I said I was resigning and didn’t hand anything formal in. But later that day, I got an email saying they were “accepting” a resignation letter I’d submitted and withdrawn back in 2024 — over a year ago! I have queried this and said I haven’t resigned and it’s unlawful to use and old document that was withdrawn as I continued working. They won’t accept they are wrong.

I feel like they’ve used this as an excuse to get rid of me and avoid maternity pay. I’ve never been disciplined, I met all my targets, and I feel like this is discrimination. I’m speaking with ACAS, but I just feel lost, angry and quite emotional right now.

Has anyone been through anything like this? Any advice or solidarity would really help.
Thanks so much.

Speak to Pregnant Then Screwed and/or ACAS to find out your Legal position and be wary of taking any advice on here as you have no idea who is properly qualified to give it or not.

As above speak to someone who can provide official advice.

On a side note though, you should consider how you respond to situations like this because from what you’ve said so far, you’ve hastily ‘resigned’ in the heat of the moment at least twice in 4 years and then rescinded that resignation. That’s not a normal professional response to dealing with work place issues,

Why did you resign and withdraw the first time?

Poor working conditions, severe micromanaging affecting motivation and confidence. They asked me to stay so I did.

You've shot yourself in the foot by announcing your resignation. Whilst written resignations are the best method to avoid ambiguity, verbal resignations are still valid. My understanding is that they can be considered legally binding and valid in most circumstances, especially if it was a clear and unambiguous statement.

The only thing you have going for you is that they're muddying things by using an old letter as some sort of 'evidence' for this resignation. I don't see how one has anything to do with the other. They could have simply accepted your verbal resignation and that would be that.

Yes, however verbal statements said in the heat of the moment while under emotional stress are likely to be dismissed

That is true. But equally it isn't a guarantee, and if there is a history of resigning, that will undermine your position.

Have you formally retracted your verbal resignation? You need to do so if you don't want to have it accepted. That puts the ball back in their court.

By whom?

Yes I have. They are adamant I resigned.

i think you've dug a bit of a hole for yourself. Doesn't sound like a good employer either

You need advice on constructive dismissal due to pregnancy as you were pushed into saying you quit.

They have a pattern of actions which only started and are focused around your telling them you need protected medical appointments and Mat leave.

If these actions did not happen you would not have said you quit. Using a year old letter as proof was very stupid of them and undermines fair belief that your verbal outburts was a valid resignation. I would also check your home insurance if you have any as they sometimes include legal advice.

Have you tried to turned up for work and been told go home?

Have you checked with an expert that this is the case?

That’s because you did.

From what I've read it seems it would be entirely up to them to offer you your job back or not. You can't just change your mind.

Verbal statements can still count though? You've told them you want to resign, you may not have meant it but you did still say it?

You can't keep resigning and then rescinding and then act surprised when they hold you to your resignation.

Did you get legal advice on this or just decide it's the case?

You can’t go leaving early And saying you’ve resigned and blame it on ‘heat of the moment’ expecting them to act like nothing happened. It’s highly unprofessional. Being pregnant is not carte blanche to behave however you want.

Keeping notes on performance isn’t bad practice. however, they should
allow you to take maternity appointments.

An employer can not bully an employee out of a job when the reason for the bullying is a PC

https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2010/15/section/18

The OP may end up in a ET where unlike most other work situations the employer has justify their change in attitude from when the OP was being asked to come back in 2024 was not due to them knowing she is pregnant.

The OP needs specific legal advice.

The only case I've seen for this was when the person didn't use the word resign and were in a very senior position where a written resignation would be expected (and did it in the heat of the moment and under stress). You can but try if you really want this job back. But having resigned twice in a year it doesn't seem that you are that keen.

They do, but tribunals (assuming it got that far) would look at the circumstances of a "heat of the moment" resignation - even if it were in writing, but esepcially if verbal. But a "history" of resigning can sway the value they place on it - there is a point at which they would say that it isn't or shouldn't be the first option. Doing it once - ok, perhaps understandable, doing it twice or more may be deemed to be pushing your luck.

As for whether there was a reasonable precipitating cause, that may also be a matter of opinion. I noted "FYI they have been keeping a secret document of all my mistakes". What I didn't note was "I didn't make any mistakes". Employers are "allowed" to keep records about employees - and they aren't required to share those records. What they do with those records, and how they might use them is the matter that would be tested.... and since it hasn't come to that yet, the OP can't really complain about the "secret record" that they know all about!

For example - employers argument - Kipdfgy has now "resigned" in a temper five times (they may not have done, but the employer can claim anything and say they were verbal), and does not take critique well. We have been moniroting performance and were just about to talk about this with them when they said they were pregnant, so we held off because we hoped not to have to go there. Yes, we asked about having appointments on sepcific days if possible - we're a small employer and have no cover.... and so on, and so on, until you get to, frankly when they resigned again it was a relief and we have accepted it.

How ould the OP counter that - because I have constructed all of that on her version and not the employers.

Surely not if your contract states you have to submit your resignation in writing though?

I would be denying that I had done this to be honest and asking them to prove it. Do they have witnesses?

Unfortunately verbal resignation is valid. Happened to a guy at my previous job. He verbally said he was leaving on the Friday. On Monday he came in and wanted to retrack his resignation. Manager refused this, saying they had accepted his resignation.

I'm not sure that's true. Good employers will have a process which allows for cooling off, but I don't think there's anything legal which requires it.