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Original poster

I was asked about my children at an interview

43 replies

conniedescending · 07/05/2008 10:30

Had an inteview yesterday for a job that I would really like. I had to bring a form with me that they had sent me and the first page of that form asked how many dependants you had amongst other questions about ethnicity, disability etc.

Anyway, interviewer went through the form in the interview and commented on my children and said something like he hadn't thought I had children and asked their ages. I said all under 5 (trying to play it down a bit) and then he asked how much mat leave I had had from my jobs for each so I said 6 mths for each child.....anyway then he said 'I assume you're ok to leave them...and I said 'yes, its not an issue and I wouldnt have applied otherwise'...he was quite polite and smiley about it but I was abit as have never been asked stuff like that before.

anyway - we then get onto the bones of the interview and it goes pretty well. The he presents me with a 'pre-employment medical questionnaire' with the question 'are you pregnant' on it - i filled it out and he then looked though it and added it to my file (I'm not pg btw).

Now I think the interview went well, I asked for feedback and it was fairly positive but I'm worried that having young children is going to count against me.

OP posts:
bethoo · 07/05/2008 10:37

bizarre, i do not think that they are allowed to take into account about your children, he sounds as if he was weighing up whether you are likely to have another kiddy thus he/his company will have to fork out maternity etc!! if you do not get the job i would question it adn ask if it had anythign to do wiht your children as that is discrimination. >>

Cappuccino · 07/05/2008 10:39

I think it is actually illegal to ask a woman about childcare

flowerybeanbag · 07/05/2008 10:41

connie this all sounds very dodgy. The form you are talking about is a monitoring form, and shouldn't be used or discussed in an interview - none of the things on there are remotely relevant to whatever the job is and whether you'd be good at it.

Medical questionnaire is slightly different, and answers on there may have an impact on a job offer. Obviously if you were pregnant, that should not be considered, and if there was a disability as well, although what adjustments would need to be made if any would obviously need to be discussed, and any excessive sickness absence might need to be discussed and addressed. Bit weird to look at that in an interview as well though, that's normally something that comes after an offer.

Bottom line is, this could well be discriminatory behaviour, depending on who else was interviewed. But you feel it went positively. I would suggest waiting to see whether you have been successful before considering what to do. Even if behaviour is discriminatory, you would need to have suffered some loss as a result to take any action so if you get the job the only question really is do you want to work for someone with dodgy interview techniques and possibly a questionable attitude towards family issues.

billybass · 07/05/2008 10:52

Agree with flowery do you really want to work there?

RubySlippers · 07/05/2008 10:54

CD - that is pants

i wouldn't want to work for them

Flowery has given great advice as per usual

it is NONE of your employers business to ask about children/childcare etc at an interview

Kathyis6incheshigh · 07/05/2008 10:58

Sounds like someone in that company needs some more training in interviewing and employment law!
Good luck. If you do get it, it might not mean that they are horrible, just that they need to be brought up to date.

billybass · 07/05/2008 11:01

Hmmm I always think that having kids counts against me when going for a job.

WideWebWitch · 07/05/2008 11:04

It#s fucking outrageous and it's discriminaory UNLESS he can PROVE he asked ALL the men the same question, bet he didn't. Fucker. This happened to me recently and I was mad as hell.

billybass · 07/05/2008 11:06

Can I ask a similar question? Can new employers count sickness which was related to maternity as a reason not to give you a job?

bethoo · 07/05/2008 11:07

no as by law you are entitled to your ante natal appointments etc.

billybass · 07/05/2008 11:09

What about time had off sick due to morning sickness?

billybass · 07/05/2008 11:18

I am off good luck CD

If anyones got any thoughts on my question I would be grateful for some advice?

flowerybeanbag · 07/05/2008 11:19

billybass have we not already answered your question on your recent thread...?

billybass · 07/05/2008 11:23

OOOh thanks flowery.I wasn't sure if they can count sickness that is maternity related but not actually mat leave when considering me for a job.I still havn't got job offer reinstated

billybass · 07/05/2008 11:30

I gotta go to nursey but any advice still gratefully received.

Will look at this thread later.

CD let us know how you get on.

Original poster
conniedescending · 07/05/2008 11:36

thanks....just to clarify, he didn't actually ask about my childcare arrangements but he did a double take when he saw the dependants and I knew a question was coming....he started with something along the lines of 'I hadn't imagined you'd have children and so many...wow' - can't help thinking that if it comes down to me or someone without kids then they'll go with the other person.

interestingly, this job was in recruitment where one would imagine they would be up-to-date with employment law and issues

OP posts:
Original poster
conniedescending · 07/05/2008 11:38

meant to add - I find out if I get to the 2nd interview on Friday so will have to see what happens.

Thanks for the advice

OP posts:
flowerybeanbag · 07/05/2008 13:56

connie hope you get the outcome you want, let us know how it goes.

Billybass I do feel your question was answered on your thread here, pregnancy related sickness like morning sickness can't be 'counted' in circumstances like yours. If you want to discuss the issue further or need something clarified I am more than happy to do so, as I am sure others are, but perhaps we could keep the discussion to your own thread rather than hijacking connie's?

I see you asked another question on the thread which I will go and respond to now.

cupsoftea · 07/05/2008 14:00

quite shocked you had to fill in a form with your medical history & the interviewer looked at it.

meglet · 07/05/2008 14:18

I'm pretty sure he isn't allowed to ask those questions. I'd be having second thoughts about actually working for them.

billybass · 07/05/2008 14:25

Ok thanks flowery.

VinegarTits · 07/05/2008 14:43

They are not allowed to ask those sort of questions in an interview, and to get you to fill in a medical form right there and then is outrageous!

I went for and interview last week and to my knowledge (unless they used powers of telepathy) they do not know that i have children, they did not ask and i did not have to fill in any forms stating so. They did ask me to fill in a medical form before hand and told me to seal it in an envelope and mark it strictly private and confidential for the attention of their HR team with 'NOT TO BE OPENED' on the front.

They should not be allowed to do what they have done in your interview, i would be very angry and report them (dont know who to? ) but yes, i would.

1dilemma · 07/05/2008 21:27

How many dc do you have?
It sounds like about 17

Chequers · 07/05/2008 21:36

Message withdrawn

Bubble99 · 07/05/2008 21:40

The medical form is reasonable if the potential job relies on a certain level of fitness, though?