Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Work

Chat with other users about all things related to working life on our Work forum.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

I was asked about my children at an interview

43 replies

conniedescending · 07/05/2008 10:30

Had an inteview yesterday for a job that I would really like. I had to bring a form with me that they had sent me and the first page of that form asked how many dependants you had amongst other questions about ethnicity, disability etc.

Anyway, interviewer went through the form in the interview and commented on my children and said something like he hadn't thought I had children and asked their ages. I said all under 5 (trying to play it down a bit) and then he asked how much mat leave I had had from my jobs for each so I said 6 mths for each child.....anyway then he said 'I assume you're ok to leave them...and I said 'yes, its not an issue and I wouldnt have applied otherwise'...he was quite polite and smiley about it but I was abit as have never been asked stuff like that before.

anyway - we then get onto the bones of the interview and it goes pretty well. The he presents me with a 'pre-employment medical questionnaire' with the question 'are you pregnant' on it - i filled it out and he then looked though it and added it to my file (I'm not pg btw).

Now I think the interview went well, I asked for feedback and it was fairly positive but I'm worried that having young children is going to count against me.

OP posts:

llareggub · 07/05/2008 21:44

It isn't reasonable for a recruiter to make a decision about fitness to work from a form unless he or she is medically qualified to make that assessment.

Bubble99 · 07/05/2008 21:47

How about someone who, say, applies for a job that involves regular lifting but has a history of back problems. Would a recruiter have to pass the form onto a doctor to make an independent assessment?

Bubble99 · 07/05/2008 21:48

Or could it be a nurse?

fizzbuzz · 07/05/2008 21:55

I cannot believe anyone could ask questions like that in this day and age (well, I can, but I prefer to think that they don't)

What a **. Didn't Alan Sugar do something like this on The Apprentice? Just about sums up what I think about him.

Original poster

conniedescending · 20/05/2008 18:38

so, I didn't get the job . To make matters worse I had to ring and leave message after message for nearly a week after the interviewer said he'd call. By the time I finally got hold of him I was fucked off because of the amount of time I'd spent preparing for it and on new top/ shoes that we can ill afford and he didn't even give me the courtsey of a thanks but no thanks call.

So the feedback was 'I wasn't quite right for the role and didn't have enough experience'.....he knew that from my cv. Not sure what to think really.....

Oh well, more applications to make. Had so many rejections this is getting a bit soul destroying.

OP posts:

frankie3 · 20/05/2008 18:46

I was asked questions about my children and my childcare arrangements at my interview for my job. I didn't mind about this as my boss really just wanted to make sure that I would be reliable and happy about the hours. Just like if they asked a man on his interview how he would travel to work if he lived a long way away.

Anyway, I got the job, and on my first day I got a phone call from my son's school saying can I come and pick him up as he had an accident in the playground! Still at the job though.

kitsmummy · 20/05/2008 18:58

DH who is an HR advisor says you have a right to feedback on the interview (more feedback than you have had) and you should also ask what the relevance was of being asked all the questions about the maternity leave, depedants etc, because on the face of it there could be a case for sex discrimination because you didn't get the job. You should talk ACAS, they have a free helpline, and explain the situation and get their view on it. If their view is a case there are lots of no-win no-fee solicitors who could act for you. Don't be too optimistic because the outcome wouldn't be anything more than another interview and possibly the same decision, but if you if feel this is important morally then you should start by talking to ACAS.

flowerybeanbag · 20/05/2008 19:28

Sorry to hear you didn't get the job connie. Kitsmummy (or her DH) says you have a right to more feedback than that. You don't I'm afraid, there is no specific right to feedback as such, although obviously it is good practice and sensible of an employer not wishing to be accused of discrimination! If you feel you want more feedback you could consider pushing for it, but the reality is if the reason you were not offered the job is a discriminatory one, they are obviously not going to say that, and if you push for more detailed feedback they will huff and puff and work out something more detailed to tell you.

You have a right to challenge a recruitment decision if you feel there has been discrimination, and this may involve seeing all the interview notes (for everyone) and everything about the recruitment campaign as you can make a special request for this stuff in the case of a sex discrimination claim.

However I would advise thinking extremely carefully before considering bringing a case. It's stressful, could be expensive and time consuming and very unlikely to be worth it financially. Do have a chat with ACAS or CAB if you feel strongly that you want to challenge it and make the point, but (as alway on here) I would advise you have a think about what outcome you want from this, rather than what point you may or may not want to make.

Original poster

conniedescending · 20/05/2008 19:35

Thanks, I don't think I want to pursue the matter really - just taken aback that they asked me this stuff and now I can't help but think that they thought I can't be flexible or that I'll be pg again and need mat pay etc etc. and that was possibly a factor.

Or maybe I was just really shit

OP posts:

flowerybeanbag · 20/05/2008 19:37

I'm sure you were marvellous.

Onwards and upwards to find yourself a lovely employer who will treat you well and deserve you.

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 21/05/2008 10:01

I do think its awful that women get asked this. Its different to a man been asked how he'd get to work if he lived a long way away - that question is relevent and would be asked to both men and women. But I bet companies don't ask men with 3 kids if they're planning on having more, etc.

I was once asked in an interview how my (then) partner felt about me applying for the job. It involved shift work and they told me in the interview I wouldn't be home to cook his tea every evening . Funnily enough I did get that job and it was ok for a year, then I got pg. Went back briefly after maternity leave and they made my life hell so I left.

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 21/05/2008 10:03

Just read that you didn't get the job. You will find something better. Sorry you didn't get this one though.

scaryteacher · 21/05/2008 10:44

I was once asked when applying for a job about period pain! I asked if they would ask a man that, and when they said they wouldn't I declined to answer the question, and referred the company to an organisation that dealt with discrimination and I believe they wrote them a letter saying that what they were doing was illegal.

StripeyKnickersSpottySocks · 21/05/2008 11:48

Did you get the job ScaryTeacher?

slug · 21/05/2008 13:34

I had an interview last week for a job I didn't get, much to my relief. They were thrusting young sales types who kept oon emphasising the 'young' bit and endless referring to porential employees as 'he' in their presentation and interview. When they asked me if I wanted feedback, I listened politely, then proceeded to give them my own feedback. A brief, curt lecture about sex and age discrimination legislation then followed.

aiden · 25/05/2008 00:12

i have read this with intrigue as i have recently finished maternity leave, have done a dozen interviews who have all asked about childcare. i get the feelings i have been turned down for some jobs because of having a baby under 1 and being a single parent. BUT i still prefer prospective employers to ask, rather than assume i can't do the job because of childcare.

I find it bizarre that there is a law that proposes to eliminate sexual discrimination but propably contributes it to it. if they're not allowed to ask, they then make a judgement based on stereotype.

Face fact, us women are the primary carer of children. if you are a working mum and your child get sick, it's more likely you are gonna take a day off rather than the father, so why shouldn't a prospective employer ask about childcare?

stealthsquiggle · 25/05/2008 00:19

Haven't read whole thread, but working for a large US corporate I can tell you

They should no way have asked you that unless they can prove they asked all the men the same

I can entirely empathise with your not wanting to persue it - if they are like this you don't want to work for them

Aiden - I see what you are saying, and whilst I am entirely anti positive disrimination (a distinct possibility in the sort of organisation I work for) employers should accept that if you have applied for something you are up for the terms of the contract - and why should they assume that you are the primary caregiver?

Sorry - will retire gracefully now before the drunken rant takes over...

Poohbah · 25/05/2008 12:39

I think the law is pretty pointless really. Who actually has the time or money to take a company to court? How can a woman decide if she has a case when she has never met the other candidates. It seems as if employers actually have a free rein to discriminate. I would prefer there to be no law rather than one that doesn't actually work in practice.

Flip

1 2