Has anyone struggled to get the tone right on Teams?

[Rosebudwater]

Im stryggling to adapt to the post covid, online only interactive work life. It's getting me down a bit, has anyone else felt like this?

I had a busy, in office five days a week, lots of chatting with colleagues , collaboration etc before I had a baby.

Then it was covid, I had another baby... Anyway, fast forward to now and for various practical and financial reasons, I have a job that's 80 percent remote, and all my direct colleagues and bosses work remotely from a different city.

IRL and before covid, I was pretty chatty at work, I like the social interaction, and joking around a bit with colleagues. They werent best friends but I liked the day to day chit chat. Obviously there's much less of that online, and anything I do say in my current job that isn't totally straight, business related, seems to be completely lost in translation. Im starting to feel like an AI bot.

I need a new job don't I? But just wanted to have a whinge and wonder if I'm the only one struggling to adapt to this kind of online working? It makes a lot of sense to WFH with small kids, but I think it's making me quite miserable.

We have a non-work chat channel - holiday, baby pics, wtf was this I saw on the way to work etc. Also one of the team runs a twice weekly trivia quiz which generates some chat.

I've got long running chats with a few colleagues which are a mix of quick work qs and a bit of chit chat but generally if there's more than a few lines of back and forth we make the effort to call.

A group of us doing the same job have a fortnightly support call which usually turns into a bit of a rant about everything but is great for letting off steam.

Another team I'm in has daily coffee Teams calls which I join occasionally. These work best if there are 6 max imo.

I think it's a culture thing - smallish friendly teams can still be friendly and chatty remotely if they want to be.

It's them, not you. Good remote working team meetings always have a connecting as people bit before moving to business to make sure you're working as a team. I hate remote working, but recognise with good managent it can work. Your team isn't functional. Look for a new job.

oh don’t be daft

When I was working fully remote and feeling a bit isolated due to life stuff, I used to try to turn up for every internal video meeting a few minutes early. Someone else is almost always a bit early too and it's an opportunity to have a quick chat without someone misinterpreting what you've written down.

Yanbu, I hate Teams too. Having a fun stuff channel would be a start but in no way replaces real life, face to face interaction.
As my kids have got older and more independent, things have improved, but work has been the main source of social interaction Mondays-Fridays for many years too.

You're not serious?! Surely you always start meetings with a how are you and asking how someone's holiday/ baby/ cat/ local weather is? Or are you one of OPs miserable colleagues who thinks their coworkers are robots. We always do it even with clients because that's how you build relationships.

This doesn’t happen often in my experience. Even if someone asks, maybe one or two would answer. The asking also doesn’t seem sincere, it’s like it’s being asked to tick a box.

I started two jobs since 2021 and have found it impossible to build good working relationships without the face to face office time.

I get you OP! I went back full time when youngest started reception, prepandemic. We had a nice culture, all got on well, had a laugh and the work got done. As people have moved on/retired, we’ve kept in touch. But - now. OMG! Hardly anyone in the office ever, if you go in, you may as well have stayed at home as no one else is in or comes in different days. You sit on Teams having had a long commute and another to look forward to at the end of the day. New staff don’t like it as they can’t bed in and don’t feel part of a team. It’s years now since the halcyon days of starting my role but I’ve never felt more isolated. There just isn’t a sense of team or a group or a shared goal anymore. People are in their own little silos, fitting in their housework and personal appointments around WFH. I’m sure half don’t work half the time they’re meant to either. Maybe it’s a management issue, who knows, but it seems to have become the norm. Not good IMO.

Working together regularly in person allows for a more natural way of communicating and getting to know one another, trying to do so on teams is just forced. It is just the incidental conversations that happen as a result of something that comes up will lead to something about a restaurant that was great at the weekend or a call from nursery to say DC not well might envoke shared experiences of juggling work and kids. Teams does not work in the same way unless you already know people personally. There is also the concern that your conversation is being monitored by management or that something said in writing to the wrong person could offend unintentionally.