Work-aholic colleagues......

[Ilivetosleep]

Hey,

Would this annoy you? I started a job about 2 years ago. It's in a school. My work contract is term time only. I'm not a teacher.

I have the same job as another person who has been in the organisation for over 20 years. She has been in lots of different roles over the years but the same as me for the past 5 years. She's a really nice and supportive person. But I feel like her commit to the job is causing me issues.

I have 4 kids and share custody of my niece with her father. Two of my kids train at a high level of sports and they need taking too and from training, matches etc each week. I also see my family regularly and friends. However my colleague sadly lost her parents a few years ago. She has no siblings and no cousins etc. She is fully committed to the job. She works over weekends. Comes in and covers shifts at the weekend for free for staff that go sick. She also works throughout the school holidays. Her choice. She's not contracted to do this. She gets involved in loads of stuff going on in the school which is not in our job role.

When someone approaches me to talk about something that is not relevant to my role. I'm polite and state that this is something that maybe the deputy head maybe able to support with. And they say, it's OK, I'll just ask XX to help me. Also if I'm not avaliable out of hours they go straight to her and she just deals with it and leaves me out of the loop. I'm starting to feel a bit redundant. She dies not need to do this. As there are educational safeguarding teams which work out of hours in each Local Authority with supports around them.

I can't leave as my youngest two are attending the school on bursaries so I have to stay for the next 7/8 years.

Just for context I am highly skilled and experienced in the sector I have been employed to work in. But I also believe in professional boundaries and my own well being.

What would you do????

I wouldn't do anything. I might throw the question back at you though - what do YOU think needs to be done, and why?

She is not going to change because you are uncomfortable. Get comfortable with it. You are fulfilling your job role, doing it well, so stop worrying.

That's a great way to think! Basically just do my job role. I think I've made some inroads. But it seems when she gets involved in issues out of hours then it escalates and she caues undue panic. I'm highly trained in the sector we work in. And panicking and not thinking issues through am a slow and reflective way can cause these issues.

Seriously IGNORE her.

Do your job.
Get your kids through school
Enjoy the holidays.

It sounds like she doesn't have much else in her life to be honest. Let her be.

But it seems when she gets involved in issues out of hours then it escalates and she caues undue panic.
If this is seriously impacting your ability to do your job, I would raise any concerns on a case by case basis. If it's impacting other colleagues but not you, I definitely wouldn't get involved!

Is there any possibility that because of this level of work it may affect her health and judgment? Something get missed?

Unlikely from what you describe, but if the case, you should raise the matter.

Hmm, the sub text here is it makes you feel bad that she’s doing so much more than you and you’re working to rule. Clearly others don’t seem to see her as incompetent as you are making out, and even though you’re blowing your own trumpet about how skilled you are, it is clearly her they go to.

It’s just difference of people. Your colleague is obviously happy going over and above, giving up free time to help out etc. You prefer just doing your contracted hours. Neither is wrong.

Bit rude. At no point did I say I thought I do the job better than her. She is very good at what she does. But I've got 27 years in front line Social work and have seen how burn out can affect people who don't have that level of reflective practice.

I just wanted to explain that this is not a role I'm new too. I was head hunted for this position.

I have spoken to her on numerous occasions about burn out and using the external networks around a family to manage risk.instead she will spend hours on a Sunday ringing families and visiting them if a child is suicidal for example. It blurs the professional boundaries.

Are you her direct manager? If so, you can certainly speak to her about any actions she's taken that you feel are inappropriate. If she is not your direct responsibility, get on with your job and stop worrying about what she's doing.

I'm guessing she doesn't have as much in her life outside of work as you do. So to keep busy, she does all this extra work for no extra pay.

People don't necessarily think she's better at the job than you - they just know that she will do the work outside of normal hours, so they can get away with dumping it on her. They're using her, but it seems she's willing to be used.

There's not much you can do about it though, so draw your boundaries, and stick to them. Don't be tempted to start working weekends and holidays just because you feel you must.

You're a DSL. Or Deputy. I'm a non teaching SDSL, having been a deputy, I know the mindset.

Honestly, I think aspects of living the job are normal in the sector. I come from teaching, which also includes elements of living thr job, so it feels less of a problem to me.

I also work lots OOH. Having said that, it's expected of the senior. But I used to as a deputy too. I've worked across three school and with many DSL across three trusts, I think it's normal.

That said, I've also worked with DSL who work to rule and that's OK too. I don't think it's 'expected', its just the type of job that defines you which lends itself to action when something happens OOH.

Maybe she throws her self into work because it’s something she enjoys but equally (I don’t want to be cruel but maybe she has nothing better to do) sounds like she is very time rich.

As a manager myself, I’d be having a conversation about work/ life balance and wellbeing. Whilst helpful, does she feel pressured to do so? does she need to put somethings down or reprioritise activities? Working out of hours isn’t expected and shouldn’t be the norm. Also it puts pressure on others to match this and isn’t fair.

Ultimately, don’t feel bad you’ve worked there a while and sure people know the score.

I would carry on as you are. Do the job you are paid for, you have a family and other commitments and need to have a good work life balance.

We work to live, not live to work.

I have spoken to her on numerous occasions about burn out and using the external networks around a family to manage risk. instead she will spend hours on a Sunday ringing families and visiting them if a child is suicidal for example. It blurs the professional boundaries.

Two things strike me with this.

You have spoken to her on numerous about her burn out - hopefully from a position of concern for her, rather than how it makes you look, time to butt out, she is an adult and up to her to make her own decisions on her work/life balance. Some people are happy with a balance heavily weighted to work. That is her choice.

She is also a professional and must not feel it blurs professional boundaries, I assume your line manager is aware of her actions, so again she is working to her own professional boundaries, that are acceptable but not aligned to yours, and if your line manager does not have an issue with it you need to butt out again.

If there is an issue which actually breaches professional conduct, I assume your role obliges you to speak to your line manager not your colleague. Stop telling an equal colleague they are, in your opinion, doing it wrong if it is only your opinion.

She sounds like a risk and a liability if I’m being entirely honest !!

anyone who works significantly more than they should, and never takes breaks is a potential risk to themselves and others. It also raises the question of what they may be protecting and hiding.

I don’t really understand the context of the job roles being discussed. But in my role I am taught I identify people who make themselves indispensable as high risk!

I'm also in schools, when I moved to my new place I explained that I would give my all, and that would be good, 25 years experience, but I would take lunch breaks (20 minutes) and I would not work from home out of hours.
If somebody else chooses to then they can buy my productivity and attendance speak for themselves. I don't burn out because I have boundaries. I feel you do too.

I'd carry on as you are but without worrying about how your colleague chooses to live her life. If she wants to take on extra work because she's got no life, let her. You're not redundant, she's there, they know what she's like after 20yrs and they still employed you. Neither of you are doing anything wrong. Ignore others passive aggressive comments (if that's what they are, it isn't clear) about getting her to help them instead. It's fine, she's the one who wants to take on duties outside of her actual role, so she's the one they should be going to if they don't want to use whatever official channels exist for whatever it is they need doing. You're overthinking it all.

Are you her line manager?

If not , stop interfering, commenting, poking into what she does

I had a boss like that, married but no children. She was in the office the minute it opened & until the minute it closed, never took her full holiday entitlement, it was like she was married to the job. She expected everyone on her group to be the same, you practically had to beg for leave & time off, she ate her lunch at her desk so we never got a break from her, she didn't trust us to do our jobs, she micromanaged everything we did, did many more work checks than were required & if she found as much as a full stop missing you got the "I'm disappointed in you" speech & then even more work checks. Everyone spent so much time checking everything they did that we never got as much work done as we should.

I'm guessing OP is not a DSL or Deputy DSL but a school counsellor. We have 2 in our large high school.

Honestly you will always find people like this in jobs. I used to be that person but as I got older I learned not to he constantly available to my job. You get more respect when you have boundaries! Just do the best you can when youre there and repeat thanks for bringing that to my attention il look into it tomorrow/Monday!

I think there are always people like this within organisations where work becomes a way of life and very much part of who they are. With the exception of busy periods or senior roles, always working does not necessarily mean that they are better at their job. If two people are doing the same job and one is doing the work within contracted hours while another is doing extra hours, either one is not working effectively or the workload is unevenly disrupted. I have seen this where someone spends much of the working day talking and unnecessarily getting involved with the work of others, meanwhile they do not focus on their own work so stay late to finish this. It appears they are very busy and going the extra mile but really they need to avoid distraction less and focus more.

Let her crack on and you do as you are doing.
I also had a manager like this and she actually come a cropper of policy so many times that she was spoken to and told in no uncertain terms to stay within the bounds of her job role.

Essentially, this is the answer. There’s a danger that you’ll be seen as a problem if her behaviour suits other people or the culture of the organisation.