Being forced to travel to another office regularly isn’t sustainable long term?

[Hairspray0]

Long story short, I need to move to an office 4 hours away from where I currently am because my mum isn’t well. The whole team there are now leaving so I’ll be on my own. Work say I’ll have to travel down to this office “as and when” for client meetings, training etc because I’ll be on my own.. despite saying a year ago that nobody would ever be forced in to any office but that’s another matter I guess.

I am just not keen to do an 8 hour round trip potentially weekly, I can’t commit to it and it’s just not sustainable in the long term in my opinion. I would have to leave about 5.30am, sit on a train for 4 hours, work my 7 hours, then straight back to the train station and get home about 11pm. I definitely do not want to do overnight stays which I will have to do if there’s something that starts pre 10am! If I did overnight I would have to do a full days work, travel for 4 hours and get in about 10pm, then same again the next day.

AIBU to think this just isn’t doable? In all honesty I think it disadvantages women who tend to bear more caring responsibilities outside of work but maybe I’m being a drama llama?

Right, now that’s making sense.

That’s common practice when you work for a company with multiple offices. You sometimes need to travel between them, and when it’s far, it includes early starts or overnight stays.

Whether it’s sustainable is a personal question for you.

But not all organisations have the option of being able to transfer such a distance? Many people in this situation either have to change jobs or only do caring at the weekend/days off, or move relative closer to them

If you are a mum, would you do what DH does?

I’m 30 so it’s not completely outside the realms of possibility that I could have my own family in the next few years. I’m just not sure how anyone with family commitments (and potentially working part time) could do that trip that often.

I think you need to try it and see if it's sustainable. If it's not you need to find a new job closer to where you're moving to. For most people that would be the only option they'd have if moving to four hours away. You seem to feel that they're being inflexible but they seem to be giving an awful lot of flexibility.

I have a very similar set-up to this and tbh it works fine for me and my family, but I don’t have the caring for another adult aspect to consider. We just had to make sure there is someone available in case DH has an emergency or is delayed at work.

it’s certainly not overly tiring - I just go to bed early on the days I’m up at 5.30.

I do apologise 100%. I thought that's what you were meant when you said women were disadvantaged - that they were treated equally. I'm sorry that I misinterpreted what you said.

Use the job you have to relocate and be there for your mum. Get settled.

Deal with 'as and when' when it comes up and negotiate. It it doesn't work for you and they wont budge then look for something else.

At the moment i wouldn't worry about the theoretical when you have a lot on your plate.

Not now, but yes, in the past I have traveled for work. It became unsustainable with 2 kids and both of us traveling round the place - there were days when the kids had neither parent in the country - one of us flying out before the other landed. It would only have taken a flight delay for it all to have come crumbling down.
Longest I had away was 2 weeks plus traveling time.
Now, I have a local job, and DH only does UK travel, plus the kids are big enough for a front door key!

As a manager of a multi site team I'd say it's up to you to make this work really if you want to do this role from that office. Sure it's give and take and negotiation but if they can't recruit in your office and you're not integrated into the team they might just decide fuck it and change the role to be solely based in the other office . Most contracts would allow them to require some travel so you might be in breach of contract if you refuse and aren't meeting business needs. And yes, mums do roles involving overnight stays. Obviously there's more flexibility for zoom meetings etc now but people do it - they share childcare with their partner or have an au pair or whatever works best for them.

It sounds like they expected there to be more of a “local” role for you in NE Scotland but now the clients have changed because of other employees leaving.

So on that basis, they need you to come back for your current clients - it’s quite flexible that they are still letting you move given the client changes. I don’t think what they said a year ago is relevant if clients want face to face.

In all honesty, I surprised they are keeping the office you are in now open. Given its just you and you can't Service your clients as there arwnr many in that area.

For me, this is doable. I have older children and dp stays over one night a week. I get up and from leaving the house at 4.30am to getting to the other office at around 9-9.30am and then the same back.

I have managed it for months and quite enjoy it. Wethwr it is for you, is entirely different.

And actuallu, I don't think it would be sex discrimination. The landscape of the client base has changed. They aren't closing the office. They are still letting you work from there. But asking you to come in when needed. If it was sex discrimination as women are more likely to carers any employer expecting anyone to be in a particular place at a particular time would be guilty of it.

How much do you like your job? Can't you start applying for new ones that don't have this travel issue?

I’m quite specialised so few and far between up there, annoyingly.

I have been thinking about putting my notice in once the mortgage porting is finalised then doing temp work for a bit, might end up changing career, but it’s all so risky in the current climate!

Look, the long and the short of it is that an employer can require you to work anywhere that is reasonable. What they’re asking is reasonable.

can you move your mum to you instead?

It’s still very much a “flexible” firm - we have people working all over the UK and even in other countries.

But if that’s the rules then that’s the rules, fair enough, it’s not up to me. I’m just not sure who they expect to hire that can do that.

But it doesn't sound like they'd expect anyone else to be based in this office but then travel to the other one - that's only happening at your request? Presumably their first choice would be that you stay based at your current office not that you moved to one four hours away - it's your life circumstances that have precipitated this, they haven't made you move.

Are they recruited into your Northern office? If not, they are incurring costs for your benefit as they could shut the office. You've already said that you could WFH but chose not to. It sounds as though they value you, so it's entirely your decision whether you're willing to compromise.

I cover the whole of England for work. I don’t live in England. My base office is a 1.5-2 hour drive away. I am away for 2-4 days a week. Sometimes the journey is 8-10 hours. Yes, I’m a mum.

Currently dealing with an employee that took a London based job (with London salary) but moved 3 hours out of London a month or so later and is now whinging about having to attend team meetings in London once a week and work in London (they’re an event planner covering London). Doesn’t understand that it isn’t actually the company’s problem that she chose to move………..

I'm not sure what you expect from the company. Do you want them to say you only have to travel max once per month, when it was your decision to move ? Presumably if you stay at current location then the training etc. is done at your home office base ? Or have I got it wrong ?

Presumably they won’t change the OP’s base location and she therefore won’t get expenses or TOIL for the travel. (Why should she when it’s her requesting the move?!)

They will pay for travel to client meetings/training/all staff meetings when it’s “not to your nearest office”, they do this for everyone.

So even though you've moved,.they'll still pay for travel etc back to base?

Yep, because it wont be my base anymore. Pretty standard for employers to pay for travel between offices I thought? Anywhere I have worked has done it, although I have always worked for big firms prior to this place.

Why are you so reluctant to do overnight stays? It sounds like the company would pay for them and makes the journey a lot more doable.

This. Either put up with it or find a new job.