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Original poster

What can I be signed off work with

154 replies

Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 07:19

I am a teacher and due back at work this week. I had my first child last year and had no intention of returning but did. I don't want to go back, the panic/fear has already set in. I've spent all week sitting down to do planning for this term and just being incredibly unproductive.

The problem is my boss is amazing, she has done so much to make me feel settled,.constant check ins etc. She knows I have been struggling. But it's just not right and hate it every second I am there. I am medicated for anxiety but feel that's not touching the sides.

My question is, what can I be signed off for? I don't feel it's necessarily WRS in the typical way, it's I hate my job, I want to be at home with my little one, I can't focus on wr tasks.

I

OP posts:
curlymom · 30/10/2022 07:57

I am a teacher and my children are grown up now. But I do remember how it felt when I was juggling so much. I also sadly know many more teachers with anxiety than I did early on in my career. You need time to relax but it is never easy going back especially after a sign off. There are many judgey comments on this thread but non teachers are unable to relate. You do need a long term plan, but you also need space to think. I would suggest getting a gp appointment just to discuss and when you feel a bit better, think of the longer term and have a plan. Hope you get some rest tonight

Clarefromwork · 30/10/2022 08:09

I understand, the thought of returning to a job you don’t enjoy after maternity leave can be really overwhelming and you might be building it up in your head to be worse then it will be (I did this!)

Are you returning full time?

Having a nice manager makes a big difference, I would just say try to focus on it not being as bad as you think it might be and see what your first day is like. It was a big relief for me after my first day back as I had built it up to be terrifying and it wasn’t. Once you have maybe been back a week or so then decide if you want to stay or look for another job.
Just think of one day at a time and not as a permanent thing you are going back to as you do have the option to look for another job if you still hate it when you go back.

Good luck, you can do it!- I know the feeling and it’s awful and can make you not think rationally as you build it up so much in your head to something worse then it might be.

HikingforScenery · 30/10/2022 08:10

If you’re anxious about going to work or doing activities related to work, then it is WRS?

PinkPanther50 · 30/10/2022 08:19

KentishMama · 30/10/2022 07:27

If you don't like your job, you quit it. You don't get signed off on medical grounds when there aren't any.

This

EnidSpyton · 30/10/2022 08:20

Hand your notice in tomorrow. Then you can leave at Christmas. This will give you the strength to go back knowing it’s just a half term to go until you can leave.

I’m a trained teacher who left after burning out so I fully understand the anxiety and stress. I know exactly what you mean when you say you have no motivation and you can’t bear the thought of going in. I battled on for a year, dragging myself out of bed every morning and putting on a front for the kids, until I got out because it was destroying my mental and physical health.

Getting yourself signed off for WRS is a temporary solution to a long term
problem that will only be resolved by you leaving. The stress of the job and how you feel about it aren’t going to change so getting signed off isn’t going to do anything other than help you make it to your leaving date.

You know the nature of school life and how challenging it is for everyone - colleagues and pupils - to have staff off with long term sickness. If you know you have no intention of returning it’s not fair on the school to use getting signed off repeatedly as a way to manage a situation that you really need to take responsibility for. The best thing for everyone - you most of all - is to hand your notice in, and go back in knowing you only have a half term left to make it through. Then your Headteacher can get a proper replacement rather than a succession of supply teachers - which is what would happen if you went down the repeated sick
note route - and you can work out your notice knowing it’s only 7 weeks to get through.

Of course if you really can’t manage to go back for 7 weeks you can get signed off for those 7 weeks and not go back in at all. But whatever you decide, you need to hand your notice in tomorrow and have an honest conversation with your headteacher so that they can ensure your class has a teacher in front of them. It doesn’t sound like the school itself is the issue, it’s the nature of the job. If the school itself have treated you kindly and fairly you really need to do the same by them.

Good luck. And go to the Facebook group Life After Teaching - fab resource filled with ex teachers who will support you on the way out of teaching.

EasterIssland · 30/10/2022 08:23

You just came back after a honeymoon period with your newborn, so it’s normal to feel this way. HoWEVER, if you continue feeling this week for a while then it’s time to resign and be a SAHM,

itispersonal · 30/10/2022 08:25

The last day to resign is tomorrow to leave at Christmas.

Unfortunately I don't think you can be signed off work because you don't like it and would prefer to be at home with your little one, wouldn't we all!

wordywitch · 30/10/2022 08:25

It sounds to me like this about more than wanting to be home with your baby. What you describe is a lot like the beginnings of anxiety and depression.

I also worked in the public sector and when I began feeling dread about going to work, I ignored it and tried to muddle through as best I could for numerous reasons: not wanting to let my employers and colleagues down in an already hugely understaffed and crumbling service, not wanting to let my patients down, and feeling sure that loads of other people feel this way about their jobs and you just have to get through it. I pushed myself until I got to breaking point, had 4 weeks off sick with anxiety, went back for 5 months during which time I became severely depressed and only realised I had to leave the job entirely when I became actively suicidal.

Not saying that to scare you or be dramatic but to emphasise that if you don’t listen to what your body and mind and intuition are telling you, you could become very unwell. Take care of yourself and listen to your gut. If it’s saying quit, quit if you can. No job is worth destroying your health.

Albgo · 30/10/2022 08:27

littlejo67 · 30/10/2022 07:34

I feel the replies have been harsh so far. I am sure most people have experienced thoughts about wanting to be unwell or in a non serious accident to escape work for a bit. Plus the OP has a child that she would rather be at home for.

I would say this is stress which could impact your future or current mental health. So maybe get signed off for mental health stress?

Maybe look for an online role using your current skills? Or working part time?
It maybe better than you think. I know for me I can dread something and then it's not as bad as I imagined, including returning to work when I think I can't face it.
Good luck OP.

Thank you @littlejo67 - I agree a lot of people have been unkind so far. Did everyone miss the part where the OP said she is being medicated for anxiety?? Stress is stress - doesn't matter if it's work related or not. If the OP feels she can't cope with work in the short term there is nothing wrong with going to the GP and talking about her mental health and options for having a break.

MintJulia · 30/10/2022 08:28

If you hate your job, resign. Getting signed off only delays you taking the decision that will solve the issue.

Can you do tutoring? Some other education related role?

Bluetrews25 · 30/10/2022 08:28

If you don't go back after mat leave, don't you have to repay some of your mat pay?
I did (decades ago) - but knew I would be doing this so kept it to one side.
You you not have to work for 3 months to keep it all? (Admit I am very out of date)

StClare101 · 30/10/2022 08:38

Not wanting to leave your little one should not be resolved by putting in a fraudulent claim. Yuck. Just be honest and resign.

EasterIssland · 30/10/2022 08:50

Albgo · 30/10/2022 08:27

Thank you @littlejo67 - I agree a lot of people have been unkind so far. Did everyone miss the part where the OP said she is being medicated for anxiety?? Stress is stress - doesn't matter if it's work related or not. If the OP feels she can't cope with work in the short term there is nothing wrong with going to the GP and talking about her mental health and options for having a break.

Show quote history

Of course you can be signed off if your role is making you stressed. However “it's I hate my job, I want to be at home with my little one” as per ops comment is not stress or anxiety.

Overthebow · 30/10/2022 08:54

Albgo · 30/10/2022 08:27

Thank you @littlejo67 - I agree a lot of people have been unkind so far. Did everyone miss the part where the OP said she is being medicated for anxiety?? Stress is stress - doesn't matter if it's work related or not. If the OP feels she can't cope with work in the short term there is nothing wrong with going to the GP and talking about her mental health and options for having a break.

Show quote history

No I didn’t miss that, but I also didn’t miss the part where op said it's I hate my job, I want to be at home with my little one

madnesss · 30/10/2022 08:55

My question is, what can I be signed off for?

Well, what is wrong with you? I would start there.

Original poster
Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 08:58

Thank you for taking the time to comment. For context I returned to work in June, I work in an alternative provision with students who can be very challenging. Not working at all isn't an option but I have been looking at alternative roles. I utterly appreciate that taking the time off can put a strain on my colleagues but ultimately I need to do right by me. I also agree being who doesn't want to be there isn't productive for the kids

The plan is to leave at Christmas, so being off is just for the interim. My attendance is exemplary and like many teachers will go to work even when they shouldn't because taking a sick day is far more work.

Thank you ever so much for the comments regarding being a role model. As much as there are apparently there are lots of people who hate their job there are also lots of people who love them. The most important role model I need to be is for my child, so staying in a job that damages my health is not the best example, and I would hate to think they would stay in a situation like that themselves.

As for just 'staying at home because I.love my baby', thank you for taking the time to post such a valuable comment.

OP posts:
MillyMollyMonday · 30/10/2022 09:09

@Rosebirdie I totally get you but wonder if your last paragraph in your OP minimised your struggles, hence some of the harsher replies. Take care x

glamourousindierockandroll · 30/10/2022 09:09

I think you need to resign and work your notice. It's not long until Christmas.

You made a commitment and wilfully heaping all of that extra work on to your line manager - the one you describe as lovely and supportive - is a very selfish thing to do.

You can do it for seven weeks, and you'll feel better knowing that you're leaving at the end of term. Please don't throw your colleagues under the bus.

KenickiesHickey · 30/10/2022 09:16

Life’s too short, resign and look for something else. Could you tutor children?

quietnightmare · 30/10/2022 09:18

Post natal going on here ?

Original poster
Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 09:21

Before the current climate, absolutely l. There are other income streams I could look at. After 7 months on £600pm of maternity, it's certainly feels more doable than previously though.

OP posts:
Original poster
Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 09:22

Thank you

OP posts:
Original poster
Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 09:23

To clarify, there are medical reasons but not quite as simple as work related stress. Work is hard but then so is life.

OP posts:
Original poster
Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 09:24

I don't have a class as such, I am a secondary AP teacher. From my point of view I think the choice is letting myself/my family down or the staff/pupils. There is that meme (I know) floating round about being replaceable at work but not home)

OP posts:
itispersonal · 30/10/2022 09:25

Rosebirdie · 30/10/2022 08:58

Thank you for taking the time to comment. For context I returned to work in June, I work in an alternative provision with students who can be very challenging. Not working at all isn't an option but I have been looking at alternative roles. I utterly appreciate that taking the time off can put a strain on my colleagues but ultimately I need to do right by me. I also agree being who doesn't want to be there isn't productive for the kids

The plan is to leave at Christmas, so being off is just for the interim. My attendance is exemplary and like many teachers will go to work even when they shouldn't because taking a sick day is far more work.

Thank you ever so much for the comments regarding being a role model. As much as there are apparently there are lots of people who hate their job there are also lots of people who love them. The most important role model I need to be is for my child, so staying in a job that damages my health is not the best example, and I would hate to think they would stay in a situation like that themselves.

As for just 'staying at home because I.love my baby', thank you for taking the time to post such a valuable comment.

So you don't want to work your notice basically and get full paid in the interim! Why don't you just ask your work to let you leave early! I'm sure they would prefer to do that than have to pay for supply whilst your off 'sick', because you want to be at home and your head isn't at work!

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