I want to leave my job after a false allegation.

[Tinseltangle]

Im relatively new to my role and have enjoyed it to date, however last week a colleague reported me for making a racist remark. I recall the conversation clearly and did not say or do anything wrong. I am not racist and would never use those words. They have decided not to put in a grievance against me however work want us to undergo mediation.
I contacted ACAS but they couldnt advise me other than to suggest I contact a civil lawyer.
I am devastated by this, it feels absolutely unfair and unjust. My gut reaction is to resign as I do not want to work with this person, I am so angry and upset this has happened to me. I am usually a resiliant person but this has floored me.
Has anyone else been in this situation?

If its public sector, unlikely someone querelous will always find a way to complain, shifts given out, holidays, working public holidays, break allocation, training allowed given, the way x spoke to them, or didn't speak to them, tone in an email, information shared or not shared with them...

Not unlikely- it's likely!

What new processes has the person found to continue their allegations?

A lot of it is due to very poor handling by HR (and Byzantine disciplinary procedures). They are terrified of her suing the organisation - she has more or less made this complaint her chief focus of her work. In some ways she is an able professional & continues to be; but then has episodes of paranoia & utterly unfounded behaviour. I'm still her manager; it's impossible really.

All her allegations have been found (following extensive investigation) to be unfounded. But the organisation will not properly stand up to her so she keeps disputing it through her union.

@MichelleScarn

Agreed - public sector provides innumerable ways for difficult or unsatisfied workers to make complaints. If they are permanent, they are ultimately untouchable.

I've learnt that people can create bizarre narratives that they believe with utter conviction.

It sounds like a horrible, stressful situation for you and it is awful to be wrongly accused of something but if you resign there will be no resolution and I think over time the memory of what happened could be very detrimental to you. As a mediator can I reassure you that our job is to be totally neutral and impartial, the mediator won’t be judging anyone, it will be an opportunity for both parties to give their sides of events and to hopefully find a way you can continue to work together. The only thing I would say is that you should ask what your organisation’s policies are about confidentiality and who, if anyone, would have sight of any report requested from the mediator. Good luck.

Thank you for all your comments, it has really helped. I think the shock has worn off and I am determind to clear my name. I have applied for another job which sounds amazing and I will keep my head held high.
I will update with how the mediation goes.

Tinsel it really touched me to hear that you've been going through such a lot recently. Take excellent care of yourself. This too shall pass.

Good. Go to mediation. Say what you want to say. Even if you later leave, it will make you feel better, to have it recorded.

Good luck @Tinseltangle it sounds like you’ve been through a lot. Good advice up thread. I just wanted to wish you all the best as you sound like a lovely person. It’s great to hear you sounding more positive. ❤️

Well this is just a classic case of fight or flight. Your first instinct is to fight and her first instinct was to flee. Neither are wrong. OP has later clarified why her resilience is currently at a low ebb, which makes flight an understandable initial reaction.

Best of luck Tinsel

Feel free to post here again if you think it might be helpful. Quite a few of us know exactly what you are experiencing 💐

@Tinseltangle how are you getting on with the situation? I hope the intense stress has gone down somewhat and you're feeling better able to cope with it and tackle everything head on? Are you getting support for your MH?

@EarringsandLipstick when you said you'd experienced "many" incidents of false allegations against yourself surely not? It would be very unusual for this to happen many times- is it a very toxic organisation? Your MH would be destroyed after once or twice.

Just a quick update, the mediation process has begun, it has been really upsetting and helpful in equal parts. Work have finally sorted out some support for me after I spelled out how badly this has affected me. Hopefully there will be some sort of resolution next week.

Fingers crossed for you @Tinseltangle it's horrible when this happens and really shakes you. I can (almost) be light hearted about when similar happened to me, but sadly will say it made me colder and less personable at work at times as my trust went in management.

Not many separate accusations - one complainant, one complaint (which was not upheld); however, the process stretched over an unacceptably long period of time, with the complainant attempting to reintroduce her complaint (that was not upheld & deemed vexatious) repeatedly & in different ways, some of which was allowed. The HR process was not fit for purpose. While no finding of fault was made against me, the process itself caused so much stress, and had the effect of legitimising the complainant (who reported to me throughout) that it was hugely punitive to me in real terms.

I’m glad things look better for you & work are offering support

Above posts should have quoted previous posts but didn't for some reason.

Hope it all works out for you. Good that they are acting swiftly to help you.

I just found your post and am in the same situation. It is just awful to go through and I am feeling exactly the same things that you described. I am currently working with my HR department to defend myself against false allegations, but I don't yet know the outcome. How did you situation work out? I hope it was positive for you in the end.

Some people just suck at a job. Like trainers who think honestly 3 weeks powerpoints cuts it, without looking at themselves (yay Mumsnet)

That's for them to live with.

I'm sorry to see others are going through this nightmare. The mediation was traumatic and extremely upsetting, with the mediator telling me this would happen to me again at some point in my working life. It became apparant they had already decided i was guilty and i refused to take any further part in it.
I resigned due to lack of support and the fear I would never be able to clear my name. It was horrendous. The liar was actually sacked several weeks later as they were terrible at their job. It also transpired their references were never checked so god knows what was in their past. Thankfully i have gone on to much bigger and better things and have put this horrendous episode well and truly behind me.