School workers; how are your dependants medical appointments viewed?

[Needanewadventure2021]

So I work in a school and was completely honest at interview stage and during the recruitment process about my child's needs. He has basically been referred to the Multi agency pathway for suspected ADHD/ASD assessment. Appointments haven't started yet but I know when they do I will have to be present and to be honest I wouldn't want anyone else to attend/support my child at these appointments but me anyway.

Today I needed to request an unrelated leave of absence for my child for something at their school that I really must attend given him going away with school and them understanding his additional needs. The request has been allowed but ive been told it will be unpaid.

This shocked my colleagues as their leave requests get authorised and paid.

It's now got me worrying about his medical appointments which are important that I attend. I am under no illusions that the process will be quick. I'm expecting a long process however they are essential in getting him the support he needs.

I suppose what I am asking is are dependent appointments not usually paid? My colleagues don't have kids and theirs are always paid. I am a one parent family so everything falls on me. I was never informed leave would be without pay so it has got me worrying about his medical appointments as I can barely afford costs of living at the moment on a full months wage. My child is primary age and doesn't communicate well so im his voice.

Thanks

Why is the meeting with school about a trip during the school day? We would facilitate before or after school-with plenty of notice. I’ve had a couple of things paid but it wouldn’t be unlimited.

All colleagues should be treated the same. If the others indeed get paid time off, you need to raise this with HR. At my school, dependents' appointments are all unpaid, for everyone.

Mine are never paid (and with two boys with additional needs, there have been quite a few!) but that is made clear in my contract. I also have to provide a copy of an appointment letter to support any leave request for dependents. There's never been any trouble having the leave authorised, but as both children attend the school I work at, they're aware of their issues and supportive of their needs.

Are the colleagues leave for their own medical reasons? If so that is different to you requesting time off for a scheduled meeting. I've never been given paid time off for medical reasons for my dd however my work were flexible and I could make up time and bring dd to work with me

Just ask for the school meeting via zoom.

Honestly I'm surprised you expected them to be paid. I think an absolute one off might be, largely because it isn't worth the faff of the paperwork, but beyond that I wouldn't expect it to be paid unless you switched around your PPA time or something. I'm sorry you're struggling though.

Is it that colleagues own medical appts get paid? You said they don't have kids. Would your own appts be paid?

Ours are unpaid for dependants appointments usually. There is some discretion but usually this is for absolute emergency reasons. Sorry you're struggling.

Could you use zoom with your DC school to cut travel time?

I’ve been working in schools a long time as support staff, and I wouldn’t expect to be paid for time off for dependants. Leave would usually be granted if it’s for a one off issue, but not it it were regular and ongoing. It’s different for teachers than support staff.

Honestly, if you need a lot of school hours off, working in a school isn’t for you. The hours are already so short, it’s unreasonable to expect them to accommodate much leave. When colleagues of mine have had to have more than one off occasions of leave, they’ve used time built up in lieu from evening training or inset days.

DS's hospital appointment was paid (DH had done the previous one as annual leave from work, but was away for this one).
I did have to broach the subject of a music exam possibly in the school day, and that would have been unpaid. In the end he got given a weekend.
I think medical appointments could be paid, but I'm not surprised a meeting is unpaid. Could it be done at 3pm, minimizing lost time?

Thank you for your replies. I wasn't expecting them to get paid but I thought as my colleagues are paid I thought I'd ask what the general way is. Obviously my concern is the amount of appointments he will potentially have. I would like to get it in my head now that they won't be paid so I know that my pay will have to take the hit.

Regarding the meeting at my child's school I said this too. Why in the school day as I won't be the only parent affected by being in work.

With regard to my colleagues paid leave it is due to both medical and non medical

I think its unfair to say working in a school isn't for me. My child is progressively struggling now with his needs so they need to be addressed.

I work in a school so I can be present and support him during the holidays where he struggles alot more due to being out of routine. I work full time in school. The only way I can make up time is to work through my lunch. I am happy to but know you cannot work 9 hours without a break.

Apologies if I've come across wrong but I was only trying to establish how dependents SEN appointments are viewed

Unpaid or I make up the time (ds has hospital
appts every couple of months). Get paid time off for my own medical appts.

Is this meeting a 1-1 to discuss your child's needs on the residential? Or a general "parents of children going on the Year X trip next week"?

It's a general parent meeting i believe. I felt it necessary to attend due to me wanting to know the plans etc and be able to talk to someone about my child's needs however I am now considering not going. And that makes me feel so horrible

It can't be that essential as a meeting if they've scheduled it during the day. Most working parents won't be able to attend.

You could speak to the school and ask any specific questions you have once the meeting information has been sent.

I wouldn't even ask at my school for time off for that because the answer would be no.

Employers don't have to give paid time off for appointments, so if they do, it's at their discretion.

Many of the company's I've worked with, will allow a certain amount of paid time and will expect you to use annual leave or unpaid leave for the rest.

In your example, attending a meeting to discuss a school trip isn't mandatory. I appreciate that you want to attend (I would), but if you've already had paid time off on other occasions, they may be less inclined to give you paid time off for things like this.

I suspect there will be other parents who can't attend. Could you suggest to the school that they hold they hold the meeting remotely as well, (work may let you have a break to do so) or record the meeting so that you can watch it later. If you need to discuss things about your child with the school, you probably won't be able to do so at the meeting anyway, so will have to arrange a follow up meeting.

I don't work in a school but I would get paid time off for my own medical appointment but I wouldn't for a meeting at the school, I'd be expected to make the time up.

I'm a teacher. We get 5 days a year paid dependant leave. After that it's unpaid.

I'd have not attempted to attend the general school trip meeting.
It's the negative side of working in a school. Things that happen in school time (mothers day tea, art show, sports day, nice to have information meetings) arent accessible.

Your school/LA should have a "special leave policy" that details what is paid and unpaid, it varies from authority and academy chain but at least you'd have it in print what will and won't be covered.

Not good of the other school to hold a meeting during the working day though- I'm dreading that sort of thing happening as neither parent can easily get time off in the working day (education too), maybe you could request a one to one meeting anyway at a better time instead to discuss the individual need and get the basic info that way too?

I work in a school. If my child was ill, or had a one off emergency type appt it would be paid, not necessarily through policy but just that’s how it tend to work. If they were regular it would be expected that I took them out of hours, or probably would be unpaid.

Colleagues’ own appointments are different, as yours would be I expect. You’re comparing apples and oranges to compare your child’s regular appts to a colleague’s own appts.

Tbh it sounds very reasonable that you’re able to go full stop, given that this is a general meeting and not something specific to your child.

I've never requested time off before so was only trying to gauge what standard practice is.

I do understand the not requesting time off for a general meeting but ive never been in this position. I suppose due to circumstances I thought it would be best to attend. My child has severe anxiety amongst other things. I was surprised he was so desperate to go, as soon as it was paid his anxiety over it has got really bad to the point now I am unsure if he will go at all. Me requesting the time to attend the meeting was more to be able to calm his worries. To understand what their plans are so I could talk my son through it to hopefully make him feel more at ease. He is young to be going on a Residential really however I don't want to hold him back. He already struggles with things his peers are able to do. I want him to feel included and try things out and be able to decide things for himself. I also don't want to look like a parent who doesn't care.

I discussed things with my LM first and even said I'd rather be told no before I request it. They said if it was their child they wouldn't miss those types of meeting ever. That made me more comfortable speaking to the HT as I didn't want to request something and look stupid.

As it's a general meeting I won't attend. It does make me feel irresponsible though by not. It's like sending him somewhere blindly. But I will ask school how do I access the information from the meeting as I cant attend.

I'm annoyed really it's in the school day. At ours it's after school finishes (but still within my work day just towards the end), but easier to take unpaid.

When I joined I accepted I would have to miss out on assemblies, sports days, events etc. I had already made peace with that. I didnt really consider his medical appointments as at the time there wasnt any but now the referrals are being made it's essential that we attend when we are invited. I wouldnt usually request time for general stuff but as he will be away for 4 days if felt more important than just general. Feel abit silly now the saying anything.

Now I know dependant appointments generally aren't paid I will factor that in. It won't affect me taking him to his appointments when they arise as I feel they are essential/important to supporting my son. As I said earlier I was fully transparent at all stages regarding my situation and discussed in detail my son and his needs and referrals at the interview so it's not like they employed me not knowing.

In which case I think you're quite lucky to have it approved at all, even unpaid!

Your sons school will send all info from the meeting out by email/letter and any specific information regarding him, that wouldn't be the right place to discuss anyway. You need to arrange a phone call or meeting outside school hours.

Medical appointments are different. Of course they should be approved but there is no guarantee they'll be paid. And try to book for the holidays wherever possible. The first appointment is always tricky but follow ups I've always managed to ask when booking and rarely had a problem.

I do always rearrange appointments for the holidays wherever possible. I managed to do this over Easter luckily. However we have been under CAMHS before and they tend to be much much less flexible. Well in my area anyway . They are a nightmare to deal.

Again I feel stupid saying anything now. As I've never requested time off for anything before I viewed it from a parents point of view, and though colleagues in my team do not have dependents, I see other member of staff leaving early to collect kids from school, take swimming, attend school meetings regularly. Of course I don't know the basis of them leaving and wouldn't ask them but it happens alot