As a new mum, whats the point?

[Wheresmrpenguin]

I'm on JSA and bring in £296, but lets call it £300 a month.

I'm really really struggling to find part time work that works around childcare, this hopefully may change soon as my DP is trying to pass his driving test. But once he does he'll likely need to buy a separate car.

I'm at home with my 18 month old after redundancy earlier this year.

But he's my whats the point (Very estimated figures).

If I work around 24 hours a week at a rate of about 10ph, Ill come in with £1000 a month.
Childcare would be £600, i'd come in with £400.
This is account for £100 per travel and extra 1 hour per day for childcare for the pick ups ect.

If I decide to work full time (because im struggling to find part time work)
Then i'd be coming in £400 left over. But at least i'd be in full time work and at least it's a job, but less quality time at home.

I could expand my distance and try to work in the nearest big city which there are loads of jobs, and i'm getting recruiters daily sending good, decent paid jobs over, but then i''d be spending an additional £200 in childcare costs to account for the travel.

So what are my options? With buying a 2nd car for my DP, we're worse off than I would be on JSA. Which runs out in December, so i'm not sure what my options are after this, i'm assuming UC. My savings are going down now too.

This is more of a rant than anything, i'm just not sure where to go next.

What's your actual rant?

Its short term pain for long term gain. If you don't work, you will massively impact your earning potential later in life, and your pension will be irrevocably lessened. When mine were early small I was at a loss of £800 a month, but after 4 years they went to school and my childcare bill reduced. Now, I am on 15k more than I was and my pension is intact because I continued to work. If I had stopped I'd be on less money now, will a huge den in my pension. My advice to everyone in this position is to keep going, its worth it in the end.

I was going to say pretty much what @Pissoi has just said. Being in work means you have more opportunities - promotion, pay rise, bonus possibilities in your current job. Employment history to aid you applying for better jobs, rather than a gap you have to explain.

Would you qualify for the 2 year old govt funded childcare? If so then it's not long till that would help you out, and really not much longer until you qualify for the 3 yr old funding.

@bangingbins

What's your actual rant?

My rant is about the lack of work options for mums returning to work. I'm seeing lots of part time work, but they're unreliable shift work, i've i've 7 years of experience working in retail( some as a manager myself) and i know how difficult managers can be and asking for set days/hours its' extremely rare, plus the god awful minimum wage wouldn't even cover childcare nevermind my bills. My previous wage was more towards the £13-14ph but trying to find something with that salary part time is really hard and competitive.

And secondly my rant is the fact that i'm not much better off in terms of paying my bills. In the short term i'd be coming in with more or less the same which doesn't help with me putting food on the table or my financial stresses. I'd be running out trying to get ready for work, drop offs and still having the same financial stress at home.

I know i'm not the only one this affects and i'm sure i've seen previous posts by others but its still frustrating. I'm not sure what the answer is
.

Note that you should deduct the cost of childcare from both salaries, not just yours. That changes everything.

@Pissoi

Its short term pain for long term gain. If you don't work, you will massively impact your earning potential later in life, and your pension will be irrevocably lessened. When mine were early small I was at a loss of £800 a month, but after 4 years they went to school and my childcare bill reduced. Now, I am on 15k more than I was and my pension is intact because I continued to work. If I had stopped I'd be on less money now, will a huge den in my pension. My advice to everyone in this position is to keep going, its worth it in the end.

I completely hear you and @AssassinatedBeautyout with that, I fully agree. My plan has been to work part time for a year until I work myself into full time work and pick up my career more then. I'm studying for a qualification and also volunteer for a charity in the same industry to gain experience, plus try run a small business (but not profitable) and volunteer at covid vaccine sites. I'm really not one for sitting back, there's no gaps in my CV. I'm hoping this will get me into a well paid job in a bit, but for now, as a new mum I just want something that will be enough to pay my bills and a bit more whilst i do the above.

But as i've just posted about financially, right now as a mum, i'm in a poor position. My DP earns about the £25-27 mark, just enough the cover the bills and is working towards a promotion but this may take time. It's still tight.

I'm just not sure what the answer is now, like I say as a new mum trying to return to work, I feel really stuck.

@AssassinatedBeauty

I was going to say pretty much what *@Pissoi* has just said. Being in work means you have more opportunities - promotion, pay rise, bonus possibilities in your current job. Employment history to aid you applying for better jobs, rather than a gap you have to explain.

Would you qualify for the 2 year old govt funded childcare? If so then it's not long till that would help you out, and really not much longer until you qualify for the 3 yr old funding.

Sorry missed the last bit, I don't believe I would because of my DP's salary.

@Justtickingboxes I know what you mean by that, it's just an easier way to manage things as my DP pays all the joint bills and I pay my own personal bills plus food shopping and keeping my DD entertained.

I don't know anyone who went back part-time, and yes, when I have my second and return to work if I were to count all the childcare against my wages (I don't, we're both earning so its a family-level calculation) then there's v little benefit to it - maybe 400 quid a month. You do it because: if you return to work at a year, its only two years till the free hours kick in. That's two years of pension contributions, continuity of employment that means you're in a 'secure' job (ideally, or at least eligible for redundancy) and hopefully further on in your career though I appreciate that's not the case for everybody. During that time it is 400/month so... nearly 10k over those two years. Not a huge amount, sure, but enough to make a difference. But also security, and working toward the future.

I personally think childcare should be massively more subsidised, a temporary cashflow issue for a 2/3 year period drives tens of thousands of women out of the workforce and most never return to where they would be otherwise. So its completely insane from an economy point of view, and is only the way it is because people don't like the idea of 'rewarding' women in any way for having children. But generally, its still worth it IMO, though I personally think part time working is a trap for most women who do it.

Use tax free childcare

Split your childcare cost with your partner

Being employed is much better for you in the long term

Are you married?

You should also get child benefit and tax free childcare at a minimum

@Pissoi

Its short term pain for long term gain. If you don't work, you will massively impact your earning potential later in life, and your pension will be irrevocably lessened. When mine were early small I was at a loss of £800 a month, but after 4 years they went to school and my childcare bill reduced. Now, I am on 15k more than I was and my pension is intact because I continued to work. If I had stopped I'd be on less money now, will a huge den in my pension. My advice to everyone in this position is to keep going, its worth it in the end.

This! SO many women see the child cost and their cost. Its not, its shared. What happens if you divorce, he dies, becomes incapacitated. Financial independence is a necessity. Always. And if you come back here in 10 years with the usual tale of woe about how hard things are and noone will hire you.....dont say you werent warned.

For me the point was investing in my and my family's future. Now, in my 50s, I have a well paid job and a level of seniority that allows me lots of flexibility.

If I'd given up work altogether when DC were small, it's highly unlikely that I'd be doing this now. I see too many mums who did that picking up bits of cleaning and supermarket jobs when their children are older.

It's really hard getting backing into work after a lengthy break.

I worked in catering and hospitality for a few years. It wasn't ideal but brought in money and because I was working evenings and weekends there were no childcare costs.
I then moved back to office work (part-time) once DS was at school and gradually upped my hours as he got older. We managed to keep childcare down to 12 days a year, which is when he went to holiday club in the summer.

The point is that you keep a foot in the door when it comes to maintaining work skills. That is important for when your child starts school or if your marriage breaks up. Keeping some sort of financial independence is important I think. The childcare should be shared with your DP so the £600 is actually split or you get joint finances. It is a joint cost but obviously if you are working part time you are doing some and the childcare provider covers the rest. Yes there are issues round hours and the cost of childcare but it is better than it was. You get 30 free hours when your child is 3 and the tax free childcare scheme. Some employers do childcare vouchers as salary sacrifice.

Two words. Financial independence. If you hop over to the relationships board you will see how many women regret not keeping their job, not having options when their marriage/relationship breaks down.

Nurseries are really expensive but it is a short term cost and being in employment is so valuable.

Our childcare bill is around £1k a month (after tax free childcare)

DH and I both earn around £1600 each net, the point is, When I went on maternity leave with DS1 5.5 years ago I earned 15k. I returned FT after having him, have has DS2 last year and now earn £27k - 12k increase in that 5 years with 2 maternity leaves (so say 18 months off) 12K increase in 3.5 years has been more than worth it.

It really is short term pain. I have 3 children and from when I went back after no 1 until no 3 was in school, I really did very little other than cover childcare and my commute. However, I have 6 years extra pension contributions and am now in a job that there is no way I would have got had I had 6 years out. I did actually have 15 months out at the point where it was craziest, but I wouldn't change anything.

Tax free childcare might help?

Stop thinking short term. Yes you won’t have that much extra money as a family as a result of both parents working outside the home (once childcare has come out of the FAMILY budget, not just your account, you are not the default parent). But like others have said it’s a massive investment in your future, your future career, pension etc. At least you will have some surplus each month and are not “paying to go to work” as it can be seen for some people.

Also you will struggle to find anything other than minimum wage work if you wait several years before going back. It’s also nice to have something of your own away from the home and the children. You know, like your husband does…

I should also say I'm widowed now and whilst that certainly wasn't part of my thinking at the time, I'd be properly stuffed now if I hadn't kept up my career when DC were small.

@Dogsandbabies

Two words. Financial independence. If you hop over to the relationships board you will see how many women regret not keeping their job, not having options when their marriage/relationship breaks down.

Nurseries are really expensive but it is a short term cost and being in employment is so valuable.

This ^

Plus, you sound like an active, busy person.
Do you think job you can get stuck into would bring you a level of personal satisfaction?
I'm a better Mum when I work.

What's the point? For me, it was because I enjoyed working more than I did staying at home, a career motivates me, maternity leave was miserable, I felt childcare was a good environment for my child, I was making pension contributions, I was developing my career and earning 3 times as much by the time my son started school. If you are literally looking at the here and now and don't enjoy work then I guess there isn't much point, but I didn't experience a lack of opportunities, I had to go get them.

Thank-you for all your comments, i'm reading them all and taking it all on board.

I do know it's a family expense though which is why my JSA goes back into paying some bills I can. I also have more a lot more savings than my DP so I have financial back up in case the worst happens. We have a joint bank account where they come out of (many in my name) but he just transfers his money in to pay it. So come childcare time it will be a shared cost.

We're also not married but we are recently engaged and want to plan a wedding, but won't be able to afford to save up for it our financial situation.

I also really don't want to ever be financially dependent on my DP, even if he earned more. I would struggle not working which is why I do the extra bits with the course and volunteering to keep my skills up to date. I'm going crazy being at home all the time tbh!

I'm very ambitious and do need work to give me satisfaction. I want to be earning more money soon but accepted it may take a bit of time to build that back up in a new company. I guess my thought process was that working part time was 'the' short term measure,.

Plus i'm really not sure how I could work full time, run a house, do my qualification and do my volunteering without it taking up my full weekend.

Running a house would be a shared job 50:50 with your husband. Same as picking up children from childcare and all other life/house/admin tasks.