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Original poster

Daughter facing disciplinary over social media post

202 replies

user89066511 · 06/08/2021 10:10

My daughter works in retail in a supermarket. During lockdown at the beginning of the year someone posted on her timeline asking how she was and saying how rubbish the year was. She replied life is pretty normal for me working in supermarket but the customers are more annoying than ever.
Someone has reported the post and she now faces disciplinary action. Can anyone give any advice? She thinks that the company are been unreasonable but I know some companies are very strict on social media posts.

OP posts:
Hekatestorch · 06/08/2021 20:27

@user89066511

Thank you all for the replies. Have spoken to my daughter and shown her the comments. She told me she felt that her company were been unreasonable as she didn't say that the customers were annoying (like I put in my OP). She has shown me the comment she put:- Life is pretty normal for me working in supermarket but people are more annoying than ever. Her argument is that they cannot prove she is talking about customers. Her profile does name the supermarket she works in.
Not sure a technicality will get her out of this and probably make it worse.
Fiddliestofsticks · 06/08/2021 20:32

She is grasping at straws, and she knows it. So do you.

She needs to grow up now. She isnt going to get anywhere with the attitude. She needs to apologise and say that she has learned her lesson.

Stardust91 · 06/08/2021 20:35

@Ifailed

I disagree with many (who read like they'd like to put OP's daughter in the stocks), and don't like this creeping Americanisation of employment in the UK. OP wrote: She replied life is pretty normal for me working in supermarket but the customers are more annoying than ever.

Which by many accounts was true for people working in retail during the start of lockdown. What's wrong with stating the truth, or are now supposed to be so servile and beholden to our employers that they can dictate how with live out lives outside of work?

Finally! Freaking hell all this people that have commented here have they actually ever worked in retail?!

I worked in a pharmacy for 5 years and some of the customers were a nightmare. I would have happily banned them all. There were entitled, rude and spoke to us like dirt. We had men call female staff 'babe' making our skin crawl.

At the first lockdown a customer spat at a colleague's face, so the OP's daughter calling customers in general 'annoying ' doesn't even cut it. If anything she was very polite and whoever took offence should give their head a wobble.

I am customer in a supermarket, of course I am like most of us if not all of us, I couldn't care less if someone said from my local supermarket that their customers are annoying as long as she wasn't naming and shaming.

pinkcircustop · 06/08/2021 20:45

@Stardust91 I’ve worked retail. It doesn’t matter whether or not she’s right.

They have a social media policy and she needs to follow it or face the consequences, which can be as severe as being fired because she is putting the company into disrepute with a comment like that.

pinkcircustop · 06/08/2021 20:46

@Stardust91 And her place of work was listed on her profile, even if she didn’t name it in her comment it can be traced back.

mumwon · 06/08/2021 20:49

"I am sorry that I said this & I should & won't repeat this (& be sincere!)
but
It was on a private setting & I didn't say this publicly or mean it to be public
I had had a really bad day (examples of awful things that had happened/been said etc)

Stardust91 · 06/08/2021 20:57

[quote pinkcircustop]@Stardust91 And her place of work was listed on her profile, even if she didn’t name it in her comment it can be traced back.[/quote]
I meant that she didn't name and shame specific customers, so nothing like 'oh yes I am working in a supermarket, but a customer named Mrs Smith from No 40 down the road is so annoying'

I don't see her original comment as massively offensive, it was a generic comment. By all means the managers can/should give her a warning in case she ever posts anything worse but to actually sack her for something like this is an overkill.

pinkcircustop · 06/08/2021 21:10

@Stardust91 It’s not overkill. It’s putting the company into disrepute and that’s misconduct.

It’s not a slap on the wrist offence. It’s irrelevant how you or she sees it. These policies are clear and there for a reason.

Ifailed · 06/08/2021 21:12

@Stardust91
At least two of us don't work in HR whose job it is to defend the company against their staff.

LobotomisedIceSkatingFan · 06/08/2021 21:18

'Except more people can identify as a supermarket customer. I could easily say oh I don't have a high school dc that's nothing to do with me. I can't do that re supermarket customer! As it was written on her public profile picture then she's very identifiable even if she doesn't state she works in Asda, people could think 'oh I recognise her, she does the tills at the Asda i shop at'.'

Nope, sorry. That's doesn't track at all. If a teacher says 'God, some parents are so annoying . . . ' they're talking about one or more of a relatively small pool of about 30 people/couples: a mum might from that identify herself; or her friend, or a nemesis; or at the very least speculate as to whom the teacher was referring - and, correct or not, they'd know that teacher was looking askance at at least one of them. And even if your kid wasn't at school, you surely wouldn't be so sanguine as to say 'Well that can't be me so we're cool . . . ' - because you'd know she was the sort of person who slagged off a particular cohort of parents. Whereas if I saw someone having a fairly mild pop at the customers of, say, Tesco (around 20% market share), or the commuters of British Rail - I couldn't possibly take offence at that. With the former, there'd be, say, one in thirty chance it was me and 100% chance it was someone I knew. Someone I could name. With the latter, even if it was a local supermarket or railway line, and you thought you recognized the checkout girl or train guard, you couldn't possibly say "Oooo, that's me they're talking about . . . " 🙄

liveforsummer · 06/08/2021 21:30

I am customer in a supermarket, of course I am like most of us if not all of us, I couldn't care less if someone said from my local supermarket that their customers are annoying as long as she wasn't naming and shaming

Unless you are her HR manager upholding their social media policy it doesn't really matter what you would or wouldn't mind

It was on a private setting & I didn't say this publicly or mean it to be public

It was on a public setting

BrushMySmush · 06/08/2021 21:51

@user89066511

Thank you all for the replies. Have spoken to my daughter and shown her the comments. She told me she felt that her company were been unreasonable as she didn't say that the customers were annoying (like I put in my OP). She has shown me the comment she put:- Life is pretty normal for me working in supermarket but people are more annoying than ever. Her argument is that they cannot prove she is talking about customers. Her profile does name the supermarket she works in.
I work in HR and used to work in retail HR. Does she mention who she works for on her profile?

If she doesn’t then then they can’t claim it’s that brand damaging, also what does the disc invite letter state? What is the alleged issue?

If I was HR on this case I’d never take it to disc based on her quote above. I’d get her manager to remind her he needs to be careful but that’s it.

TheGenealogist · 07/08/2021 00:02

It clearly says in the post that you quoted that her profile names the supermarket she works for.

Jobsharenightmare · 07/08/2021 00:13

She mentions the supermarket and then says but.... It definitely reads as she's referring to people she deals with at work whether that's colleagues or customers.

JanuaryBones · 07/08/2021 00:22

Jeez, what an overreaction from your DD's employer. I think most customers get their impressions of the supermarket from how the staff are when they're working. If Maud or Daisy smile, help me find something and take the discounts off at the till I couldn't care how they talk about me outside of work. So is the idea that the customer might know your DD on social media, read her comment and then decide not the shop at that store anymore? That's bonkers.

QueenofDestruction · 07/08/2021 00:35

So instead of saying her customers are annoying she includes colleagues, her work is not being unreasonable. You do not say anything negative about your work on social media, she really should adjust her attitude imo re the comment she made

SpeakingFranglais · 07/08/2021 06:26

I’m pretty sure my company would also dismiss for this.

We have mandatory training on social media and a similar example is used and the result is dismissal.

I think I’d be inclined to jump before I was pushed.

flowery · 07/08/2021 08:48

For me this falls into the “luckily no real harm done but it could have been a lot worse” category therefore I probably wouldn’t dismiss and would give a warning instead.

BlueSurfer · 07/08/2021 09:02

I think who made the complaint would also come into it. A customer who recognised her on social media and took offence at it would be a stronger complaint than a friend/follower who mentioned it in passing to a manager.

It will probably surprise a lot of poster how many customers do make random complaints about these sorts of things.

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 07/08/2021 12:31

I'm not sure it matters that she used the word people over customers. It suggests she thinks everyone she comes into contact whilst she is working is annoying. He manager, her colleagues, the customers..it doesn't help. If anything it makes it worse.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 07/08/2021 12:36

So she's really thinking of going in there with the attitude "You can't prove anything so there "?

Good luck with that; she'll learn one day, but some take longer than others ...

Viviennemary · 07/08/2021 12:54

If I was in charge and she came in with a bad attitude then I would dismiss her if what she did was legally a dismissal offence. If she was repentant and apologetic then I would give her another chance. If her attitude is generally stroppy maybe she's the problem and not the other staff and customers.

LIZS · 07/08/2021 12:57

"People" includes colleagues as well as general public. Is there a social media policy?

MiaRoma · 07/08/2021 13:43

@user89066511

Thank you all for the replies. Have spoken to my daughter and shown her the comments. She told me she felt that her company were been unreasonable as she didn't say that the customers were annoying (like I put in my OP). She has shown me the comment she put:- Life is pretty normal for me working in supermarket but people are more annoying than ever. Her argument is that they cannot prove she is talking about customers. Her profile does name the supermarket she works in.

Your daughter is wrong. The company is NOT being unreasonable. Your daughter is being unreasonable and an idiot

HalzTangz · 07/08/2021 13:51

@user89066511

Thank you all for the replies. Have spoken to my daughter and shown her the comments. She told me she felt that her company were been unreasonable as she didn't say that the customers were annoying (like I put in my OP). She has shown me the comment she put:- Life is pretty normal for me working in supermarket but people are more annoying than ever. Her argument is that they cannot prove she is talking about customers. Her profile does name the supermarket she works in.
As her comment was written as one sentence it does link the 'people' as being the 'customers'

Your daughter needs to re read her handbook which will have a whole section about social media.

She needs to accept she is in the wrong, and not try to argue otherwise (which she is doing by saying the company is unreasonable)

Your daughter is in the wrong and her comment could realistically cost her her job. She may save it if she shows genuine remorse, however as she feels the company is unreasonable, I don't see how she will show genuine remorse in the disciplinary