Was this a shorty thing to do?

[cartonwheel]

I had a job offer come through last week. I contacted the person who sent it to me straight away and I told him that I will be replying to the email with a signed copy of the offer shortly. The reason I called him was to tell him that I've actually just found out that I'm pregnant and I wanted to tell him over the phone rather than email. He then stopped me and said 'Okay, congratulations. Please don't worry about signing the job offer yet, leave it with me. If I'm not in touch by the end of next week (now this week), please take it as a no from us.' I know I should have waited and left it it until I've started the job to tell them but honestly...I'm glad I told them before I left my current job. I just think it was a bit of a shitty thing to say. I was so excited to start this job, they genuinely looked like a great company to work for - obviously not.

I mean...shitty of course...but what did you expect? That's what happens.

You shouldn't have said anything until the thing was signed

What he's done is illegal, he's not allowed to discriminate based on pregnancy. It's possibly more trouble than it's worth to do anything about it but he would in all likelihood lose at an employment tribunal if you bought it to one.

That is against the law and they cannot retract an offer because you are pregnant regardless of you having signed the offer letter or not. He has suggested quite strongly that they may retract the offer because of your pregnancy. That is both sex discrimination and maternity related discrimination.
I suggest you email them asking them to clarify their position and accepting the role if you want it !

There is another poster in here who has just won an Employment tribunal for an almost identical situation.

Well if they offered you the job then rescinded it because you told them you're pregnant I think you could take them to court!

www.acas.org.uk/if-your-job-offer-is-withdrawn

@thekingfisher

That is against the law and they cannot retract an offer because you are pregnant regardless of you having signed the offer letter or not. He has suggested quite strongly that they may retract the offer because of your pregnancy. That is both sex discrimination and maternity related discrimination. I suggest you email them asking them to clarify their position and accepting the role if you want it !

There is another poster in here who has just won an Employment tribunal for an almost identical situation.

This! See if you can find the previous thread as this was exactly what happened to another lady.

Why on Earth did you tell them?

Anyway pls are correct it is illegal.

That is illegal. But I don't know what on earth you were thinking by calling up to tell them before you had started.

It's shitty on both your parts really - his because legally he can't really retract the offer and yours for getting pregnant when you are applying for new jobs and now you've put them in an awful position

As others have said it is unlawful, direct discrimination.

Have you got proof they made an offer? I’d follow up with an email asking what has happened to your offer since you notified them you were pregnant. I’d also take a screen shot of the call log and make a note of everything you can remember about the conversation.

You then have to consider whether you want to go all the way to tribunal, as it’s public and there’s a risk your current employer would find out but any employment lawyer would advise them to settle this one, I think!

Obviously withdrawing an offer after finding out you're pregnant is shitty (and illegal). Have you had any contact since?

Send them an email with your signed job offer and saying that as per your telephone call on X date and X time, you are pregnant and you are looking forward to starting with them.

Then when they turn around and withdraw the offer by email, you've got it all in writing. There was a thread update recently where something similar happened to a woman and she took them through the legal process which took a long time but she won and also won a lot of money.

@FortunesFave

I mean...shitty of course...but what did you expect? That's what happens.

Perhaps she expected the employer to comply with the law? Not an outrageous expectation, surely?

If all you have is a phone call and him saying if you’ve heard nothing take it as a no, I would consider whether to sign the offer and send to him anyway. That way if he intends to break the law he’ll have to do so explicitly rather than by lack of action.

Obviously there is a risk if you do that he might in the meantime take advice and then continue with the offer, and you don’t want to work there now. But worth thinking about.

I'd be accepting the offer via email, puts him in a more difficult situation if he does indeed want to illegally discriminate against you by withdrawing the offer. If you don't accept I fear they could pass it off somehow as you not accepting so they offered to the next person.

Perhaps she expected the employer to comply with the law? Not an outrageous expectation, surely?

Yes but it's shitty to be applying for jobs (when you are already in employment of course) when knowingly trying to conceive or not preventing.

It's just adds to the stereotype that women of child bearing age are a PITA to employ?
She'll be in the job a few months and then could take 12 months off and then feasibly have another straight away so being of upwards of 2 years out of the workplace all whilst her employer has to hold her job open? 🤷‍♀️

Out of interest, @ivfbeenbusy, are there any other legal rights that you think it's shitty of a person to exercise?

I took over two years to successfully have my first child (from the user name you surely also had a long time TTC-ing?) - I was actively trying throughout and pregnant three times, all of which ended in miscarriage. I changed jobs during that period. Should I really have not applied for a job during that time? What if it had been five years, or ten?

@ivfbeenbusy

Perhaps she expected the employer to comply with the law? Not an outrageous expectation, surely?

Yes but it's shitty to be applying for jobs (when you are already in employment of course) when knowingly trying to conceive or not preventing.

It's just adds to the stereotype that women of child bearing age are a PITA to employ?
She'll be in the job a few months and then could take 12 months off and then feasibly have another straight away so being of upwards of 2 years out of the workplace all whilst her employer has to hold her job open? 🤷‍♀️

Utterly ridiculous.

Took 4 years to conceive - you think I shouldn't have changed my role in that time? Ffs.

@helloxhristmas @Hardbackwriter
Yes it took me 4 years and 5 rounds of IVF. No I didn't change employer during that time even though I wanted to. I would also not have pursued IVF whilst actively applying for jobs or within the probation period.

The threads for the similar issue are in Legal Matters - sorry don’t know how to link!

@ivfbeenbusy - that's great for you that you didn't have to change jobs in that time, but I've been trying for 4 years and was just made redundant this year. Should I have not pursued another role and instead waited another 4 or 10 years or however long it takes to get pregnant? I assume your partner (if you have one) also didn't change roles in that time (in case he wants to take time off for shared parental leave)?

@cartonwheel - as you've had a job offer come through, accept it if you want it. Although, can understand if you don't want to work for this company now.

It's sad that we can't tell employers that we're pregnant (which isn't relevant to the role), but it's not just a shitty thing to do, it's illegal! In the laws-eyes, it's the exact same as telling them your race or sexual orientation and them then pulling the role.

There was very recently a very similar post of a lady who went through basically the same thing. Had an offer, told them she was pregnant, and it was retracted. She pursued it. Dragged on for months, but worth it if just from a moral basis!

”Yes but it's shitty to be applying for jobs (when you are already in employment of course) when knowingly trying to conceive or not preventing.”

Is it also shitty to apply for jobs when you have a disability and know you’ll need more time off than others? How about if you have four kids under 7 and no support and you know you’ll have to do all the looking after them when they’re ill?

And how long does a woman have to be in a job before you’d deem it acceptable to start trying to get pregnant? A day? A week? Six months? A year? If getting pregnant before you start is “shitty”, is getting pregnant a week later also “shitty”? How long?

I agree that you should accept via email.
Make sure you save the email as well.

Good luck!

Here's two threads where a similar thing happened to the OP:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_matters/3651983-Job-Offer-withdrawn-after-informing-employer-that-I-am-pregnant

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_matters/3928655-Job-offer-withdrawn-continued

Ignore people that advise on the assumption that every woman can choose exactly when they get pregnant. It's simply not true. Life would be much simpler if it were!