Another “complaint” has been raised. WWYD

[CheekyFuckersDontGetPastMe]

There is a women at work (we have bothe been with the company same amount of time, same role. but, last year I moved into her dept.

I’ve never had a complaint raised about me or my performance and I’ve worked here for 5+ years, great reviews and feedback etc.

Within a month or two she raised an anonymous complaint she had recieved and sent it directly to the HR director.

This was a non issue and dismissed by the HRD, senior management team, we all moved on. Said lady went on mat leave and I worked on my relations with the team.

Over time I had people tell me she had encourage the anon complaint to be made for her to pass on above our line manager. I ignored this, I don’t do gossip but it stuck in my head.

She returned a few weeks ago , I’ve sort of Grey rocked her. I then receive an email on Friday titled complaint asking for us to meet tomorrow morning to discuss it.

It’s a here we go again but I need to find a way to handle it.

I know 100% I’ve done nothing to warrant a complaint again and even if I had, we have reporting lines for these things to be addressed through.

I can’t pretend it’s not been on my mind all weekend which I feel the intention was in the first place.

I am looking for a new job which is a shame as, apart from this woman I love my job but it’s a role where I need to work with her to an extent.

Any interaction should be followed up by e-mail, ‘just to confirm the following points from our meeting on x date at x time....’ I did this when I was being bullied by my team leader. He had said he wanted me to be in work 39 minutes early each day too get ready for the day...’ that didn’t work for me so I e-mailed to confirm cc’ing HR and asked him to confirm my pay increase based on the 10 hours extra a month. I’ve never seen anyone shit their pants so fast. Good luck today.

Thank you, I’m going to see my LM first thing this morning

Good luck, thinking of you

Good luck!

I think you're wise to pass this to your LM. And make sure he/she knows that you believe these two complaints are personally motivated.

Good luck

Ask a manager is a good site to visit for advice on this Tue of stuff

Good luck.

Good luck!

Let us know how you get on!

Good luck OP.

I just wanted to share my DH’s experience with a woman like this. Despite him being very qualified for the job, she picked and picked at him using methods similar to your crazy lady. He went along with it so as not to cause a drama and in the end it completely destroyed his confidence. He no longer knew what was her making stuff up and what was true so questioned everything he did and everything he said.

He ended up leaving but years later is still not as confident as he should be in his job. They had a very high turn over of staff because of her and I could never figure out what the point of it all was.

These people will put hours and hours into their plans and will have strategies to cover every move you might make. They’re beyond toxic. Be smart and don’t pander to anything with her.

It went well in the end. It wasn’t something that could be made up and was easily solved with a few emails.

Still feel crap that I let it bother me so much, that i don’t trust anyone anymore and much like your DH Norma I’m second guessing myself all the time.

It’s rubbish

I second @Weenurse's recommendation -askamanager.org is brilliant for this sort of thing. If you can think of a strategy for dealing with her it might take the edge of the dread a bit.

Well done, OP. I'm glad it went ok. Do you think it will carry on?

Oh yes, I didn’t hold myself well first thing, ended up a bit teary with my LM

Managed to gather myself very quickly but we all know where “tears at work” ends, it was solely through frustration.

I’m applying for jobs over and over again, fingers crossed for me.

Put it out of your head now. You dealt with it professionally and it was easily solved. Don't overthink it. Focus on doing your best job and ignore this woman.

OP so glad things are looking up for you. Well done on how you handled his.

Norma - your DH's experience strikes a chord with me - the second-guessing, the lack of confidence ... these people really are toxic.

Poor you. You have to wonder why so many business do this? To conscientious workers.

I'm totally ashamed that your 'tears at work' comment hit home to me!