Insidious bullying at work

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Are there any lovely wise m.netters out there who might be able to offer some quite urgent advice? I am extremely concerned about one of my lovely colleagues. Will try to keep it brief. Small company. Boss away in usa on very special once in a life-time, one off family get together. Boss left an "equal" to me and all 5 other colleagues, as "someone to go to" but not "in charge". That someone, has taken the opportunity to, (in my view) seriously bully one of the others who, she has a history of disliking. She immediately altered that other girls working times, cutting her hours greatly, causing her serious financial difficulties. (This was without any sound reason whatsoever). She (the assumed herself boss) has not done any worthwhile work herself in the bosses absence, and has delegated all her own work to the rest of us. She has done little except strut around with her perceived bosses cap on, visibly making notes, (about us all) and has done it very deliberately about this colleague, in sight, as if to undermine her. I think this is Insidious Bullying. Colleague on the verge of a break-down, constantly in tears and now having panic attacks, terribly upset, and coming to me for support. I give as good as I possibly can, but am on the verge of advising colleague to get professional advice from acas, or such like? Cannot and will not bother poor boss, who thought he had left us "so-called" loyal group in a positive and safe environment. "Presumed boss has also criticised me, and made notes about me, but I don't give a half of a jot... When boss is back, I will tell him absolutely everything that has been going on in his absence, but how can I help poor colleague (she is, actually, a very good worker and a lovely person!!) not that that should make any difference. I have even thought of advising her to go to her doc. and get signed off with work-related stress illness, because that is absolutely what it is. A couple of days ago, I took her home, as she was shaking, crying and in a really upset state. It is effecting me a bit, because I am distracted, very worried about my colleague, very angry, and very keen for boss to be left in peace. (wonderful, kind and caring boss by the way). Any advice, please, before tomorrow? Thanks in advance. x worried me!

Have you written everything down? Dates, times, and descriptions of incidents?

To be honest, I’d be contacting the owner at this point. Will they be checking your emails? If this were happening in my business, I’d 100% want to know.

How long has your boss been away?
How long will he be away for?

I don’t understand how Bullying Colleague (BC) can change anyone’s hours, can’t your other colleague just continue to come in and work her usual hours and ignore anything BC says?
You said BC isn’t in charge, so she can’t force your other colleague to do anything like change her hours surely.

And why is everyone else doing her work for her?
You should organise a office chat when BC isn’t around and make a pact to ignore her and refuse to do her work.
If your boss didn’t give her any power she only has power over you all if you give it to her.

I’d also be tempted to set up a camera or position my phone in a way to record her acting in this way.

Sounds horrible, while the cats away. Would you feel confident speaking to the bully, say they are only an acting short term manager, you have noticed bullying in the office and it has to stop. Tell them this is having a detrimental effect on the staff and the business will suffer as a result. If they deny it, ask for a staff meeting, you can all support each other, she probably has no right to cut the other persons hours, you could ask her why she did this, has she got authority, did she consult the manager, with the colleague who is feeling upset, she should not have to go off sick, support her, don't let her be alone with the bully, document all conversations, when she starts on her tell her to stop. Let her strut about like a peacock, making notes, ignore this if you can. Your boss will be back soon, email him to say there have been a few issues at work when he returns which you would like to discuss with him. Don't let stupid face see any of you get upset or angry, try and stay calm and professional, she's get her comeuppance when he's back.

If it's a small company I agree it's worth trying to record some of her behaviour so you can discuss it with the boss on his return. It's also fair enough for your colleague to look into getting signed off. However, how long will this trip last? Surely it will be back to normal soon?

How long has he been away for that this has managed to escalate so much?

Whilst I recognise how unpleasant and frightening it can be to experience targeted bullying, if this is a short term interim arrangement while the boss is away, it seems somewhat of an over-reaction on the part of your colleague to become so highly stressed that they need to be signed off with stress. The most constructive thing you can do for them, in terms of immediate support, is to help them keep this in perspective.

If they have contracted hours written into their T&Cs ("your hours of employment are 37.5 hours/week" or "30 hours over 4 days" etc, and they have habitually performed their duties during these hours, then this person deputising for your boss cannot just arbitrarily cut their hours to suit their power trip. If the person is on a zero hours contract, then that puts a different light on it, because this person could argue that they have been given the power of decision-making during the boss's absence.

As pp's have said, keep a record of all the issues, and don't hold back in telling your boss everything, chapter and verse. They will want to know.

Hopefully your boss is fair minded and doesn't let them get away with murder. The problem is if they are buddy-buddy with this self-appointed deputy then they could try to defend them. If so, then it's all down to T&Cs in the person's employment contract, that's why it's there, so someone like this can't come along and sweep it aside for their entertainment.

Personally I would not recommend confronting the bully, that isn't your place. Support your colleague by all means, but don't get embroiled in a situation that could turn nasty if they are as flakey as your OP suggests.

Maybe keeping your distance a bit is right, your colleagues may just need someone to listen to, they can stand up for themselves and sometimes they deny there was a problem when the boss is back. I have seen this happen, I hate to see people being bullied and picked on, it makes working so unpleasant.

I don't think you're being fair to the Boss by not interrupting his holiday and giving him the information

Thank you all SO much!!

Firstly, as several of you mentioned, I hadn't taken notes, times and dates, but a close friend of mine who I talked about it with recommended doing this, and when typed out, it looks fairly horrendous!
Boss flies home tomorrow night after three weeks away. Will be back in the office tomorrow (Monday) afternoon. I have already emailed his work in-box asking for a private meeting tomorrow afternoon. I will absolutely tell him everything, and show him my notes of times and dates and actions, which actually misses out quite a few, which neither my colleague or myself can remember well enough to commit to a note! It looks horrendous when typed up! I am seriously going to reccommend that he donates a "discretionary" week off for that poor colleague - she has been through the mill.
No, not zero hours, so "pretend boss" had no right, nor reason to slash her hours. Thank goodness boss is back tomorrow. I feel and believe, (and hope) he will not tolerate what has happened. Will let you know. Colleague now to unwell to come to work tomorrow until all sorted .. have told her to call in sick, but not to me, as I can't help. She was going to just not turn up, but I have persuaded her to do the right thing and actually call in sick rather than just not turning up.

~Thank each of you very much! xx

I hope things have improved today.

I wouldn't call it insidious bullying; insidious means gradual, subtle. What you have described, in just 3 weeks, sounds very blatant.

What happened today OP?

Hope it gets sorted- I hate bullies

Hi all you helpful lovelies! EBearhug, you are absolutely right, this was more than insidious..

Boss back, and was actually shell-shocked to hear about it all. He kindly telephoned colleague at home, to re-assure her that he was taking this seriously, and that it would never be allowed to happen again. Pretend boss was very sheepish and iffy, when she noticed me go in for a meeting with real boss, and has suddenly gone very quiet, and keeping herself to herself! I keep catching her "looking at me" and then suddenly looking away. Boss is having a talk with her tomorrow (even my stomach is churning now, so goodness knows how poor colleague has been feeling) and am not looking forward to tomorrow myself. Other colleagues very much left it up to me, but boss is going to speak to everyone individually. I looked up and down-loaded an excellent article on bullying from Acas which gave a lot of good advice, if anyone out there should ever find themselves in a similar situation. Thank you everyone, I promise to up-date you after tomorrow. x

That all sounds quite positive so far.

Do you have the link to the ACAS article, please?

.

Hi Ebear, here it is.

www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=797

Now I am feeling a bit stressy, and can't settle, because I am worrying about pretend bosses meeting with real boss tomorrow! argghh!

xx

I can't believe your colleague caused so much trouble in 3 short weeks. Imagine the damage they could do in an actual position of power! Hope all goes well tomorrow. X

Glad your Boss is looking out for your colleague

That is really nasty behaviour on pretend boss' part. She can't have thought she'd get away with that, surely?

Hope actual boss gets things sorted. Well done for standing up for your bullied colleague; most people wouldn't bother for fear of reprisals.

How did it go today.

It's good to see a boss taking this kind of thing seriously... I was very severely bullied in my last job so much so that I was very extremely close to ending everything. colleague was cute in that she did it when no one was around so my word against hers.. complained to the boss and handed in as requested an official letter detailing said abuse and was promised that he would act on it.. he never mentioned the letter again and for the next 18 months he along with business partner joined in on the bullying.. had I not got a new job I could honestly say I wouldn't be here writing this.
So it's great to hear that there are decent employers out there that act in these things..

Hi guys, thank you all for your support, and I always hate to leave people wondering what the outcome was. Boss first and foremost had lovely colleague in, and got all the facts straight from her, followed by the other colleagues. Pretend boss was on tenterhooks, watching it all go on and extremely sheepish, (seemingly utterly engrossed in her work). He then reassured lovely colleague, AWARDED her the pay she should have had before her hours were slashed, and then lastly had pretend boss in for a very stern discussion. He didn't go down the lines of warnings/disciplinary action, but gave her a very stern talking to. She has since been spotted on "Indeed.com" several times, has not spoken to any one of us, is clearly feeling a complete fool (well so she should, and I hope she feels totally ashamed of herself.) LONELY, yes, the very reason I stood up for lovely colleague, is that I too, was once quite nastily bullied at work, which made me very ill (panic attacks, sleeplessness, depression, stomach disorder) and I had no-one I felt I could turn to. So I knew what she was going through. Good out-come here tho! Hoping we find she hands her notice in and just clears off. Have a great weekend everybody xxxxxxxxxxxx

Ah great ..thanks for the update ...justice is done !