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Original poster

Signed off sick, WIBU to go away?

43 replies

Arkengarthdale · 16/07/2018 19:35

I've been signed off work sick due to low mood and exhaustion due to various things - injury, bereavement, caring duties amongst other things - it's all got a bit much and I've fallen apart. I've been signed off for a fortnight and prescribed antidepressants which won't kick in for a few days, and told to rest, recover, practise mindfulness, eat plenty of fresh fruit and veg and be kind to myself. I have an amazing opportunity to do this at a friends house - would it be ok to go away for a week to recover, do you think? However, the friends house is in France and I'm not...

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 16/07/2018 19:36

Go for it! I wouldn’t put anything on social media if you use any because people can be judgy arseholes but if you’ll enjoy it and feel better then go for it.

Piffpaffpoff · 16/07/2018 19:39

Given the nature of your reason for being off, is heartily recommend it. Sounds like just what you need.

However, Unfair as it sounds, I would not share it with anyone, as others may unfortunately not be as understanding. No social media posts for example.

Do it, and I hope it helps you feel better!

Failingat40 · 16/07/2018 19:46

Yanbu. You should use the time off to recover and if time away from home helps then you absolutely should do it.

However, as mentioned above, don't flaunt it. It's times like these unfortunately that you find out who your real friends are as many, many people are judgmental of mental health and see sick leave as 'a holiday' Hmm

Be discreet and don't post anything on social media at all.

Get well soon Thanks

387I2 · 16/07/2018 19:51

The goal is that you should rest and recover, and if you need to do that at your friends house, why not? Sitting at home alone might make you more depressed. Fallingat40 has a point, though.

MrsMozart · 16/07/2018 20:02

Go.

I hope it helps.

Original poster
Arkengarthdale · 16/07/2018 20:03

Oh good points about not flaunting it. I've also been recommended gentle exercise like swimming and it has a pool...

Part of the reason for the low mood is I live in a not brilliant tiny flat, lower ground, north facing, surrounded by high walls so always cold and dark. I have the heating on occasionally even now with this glorious sunshine.

Thanks all, feeling better already. I know the journey well so I'm not fazed by that. Oh E Le Clerc how I miss you 😄 🇫🇷

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 16/07/2018 20:06

You are completely abs utterly not being remotely unreasonable. I would say it was a great idea.
The only time travel when signed off is a bad idea is if you're Doing what you claim you can't do at work. So I can't sit at my desk but I can sit to fly across the world.
In this instance there's no reason not to and it could really aid your recovery.
Go for it and I hope you feel much better soon.

TittyGolightly · 16/07/2018 20:07

Your employer might require you to take annual leave if you aren’t going to be available for meetings for a period of tone whilst off sick.

Furx · 16/07/2018 20:08

Don’t call it a holiday, call it a ‚‘wellness retreat‘

And yep, I’ve done the same. But it was a caravan at Skegness ....

wtffgs2 · 16/07/2018 20:09

Go and enjoy it. It sounds perfect.

I'd echo the stuff about social media but, yes, it sounds just what you need Brew

Hamiltoes · 16/07/2018 20:10

Sorry but I do think YAB slightly U. And that's probably because I've had the most horrendous day ever covering my 3 man department by myself because they are both signed off long term with depression. I do tend to think "what if everyone did this" the place would grind to a halt. What if I just decided I couldn't take my pokey little flat and my shit, stressful job? I genuinely couldn't because I have kids to support but god I would love to fuck off for a week by a pool. (To be fair I only got back to weeks ago haha). One of them does have a holiday pre-booked for end of July and I'm interested to see if he goes. But don't take any notice of me as I say I'm (rightly or wrongly) pissed off and probably venting. I really hope it makes you feel better. WineFlowersCake

mineofuselessinformation · 16/07/2018 20:11

Don't be silly, Titty, if you're off sick, you're not available for any kind of work. Hmm
Another one saying go for it, OP. It sounds like it might do you the world of good.

PrettyWisdomous · 16/07/2018 20:15

What if I just decided I couldn't take my pokey little flat and my shit, stressful job?

Don't be an arsehole. You don't just decide to be depressed Biscuit

Echo previous sensible posters OP, go and relax but don't tell anyone that doesn't need to know!

Hamiltoes · 16/07/2018 20:19

petty I totally accept my arseholeshness! As i say it's been a rough day... and possibly a gentle reminder that op might be best keeping it off social media.

Biologifemini · 16/07/2018 20:22

It sounds like you need some sun
However I would be looking into moving flats as it isn’t helping the situation
Don’t put this on Facebook otherwise you could be in trouble

DeathlyPail · 16/07/2018 20:22

A few years back over the period of 12 months I had 2 pretty major operations, at the end of the recovery period for the 2nd one I went overseas with the full knowledge of my manager. My consultant was happy for me to travel but I had to rest so couldn't work.

I also have a DC who suffers from Anxiety, Stress and Depression and understand how a break away from the place that may be causing the issues can do wonders for a recovery. If you were on my team I would be encouraging you.

DeathlyPail · 16/07/2018 20:25

Oh and OP I am currently covering a job as my colleague is on maternity leave and the directors didn't think we needed a temp whilst she was away for a year. Then one of the other team members is off with stress (go figure) and even so I think your recovery plan is good.

Notquiteagandt · 16/07/2018 20:51

I would go for it. I would broadcast it.but wouldnt lie of asked. Just say you needed a quiet place etc.

Original poster
Arkengarthdale · 16/07/2018 21:07

My job isn't shit and stressful, it's a beacon of reasonableness in a shitty time I'm having. However it is busy and demanding and I'm struggling with it because of other things. I'm not on top of my game so I'm letting people down who are entitled to expect me to be fully fit if I'm at work. I suggested to the GP that i take my laptop with me and she nearly thumped me with her stethoscope for being ridiculous. I move out of my poky horrid flat in six weeks so that's sorted.

Thanks again all. I won't send any pics on Facebook 😂

OP posts:
TittyGolightly · 16/07/2018 21:10

Don't be silly, Titty, if you're off sick, you're not available for any kind of work. hmm

I’m a fully qualified HR professional.

Sickness absence meetings take place during sickness. If you’re not available for them because you’ve gone on holiday your employer can require you to take it as leave.

(As is the case in the NHS in Wales, among other large employers.)

Original poster
Arkengarthdale · 16/07/2018 21:28

That's reasonable Titty. I thought you meant work meetings. I sustained my injury at work and they all know about the recent bereavement and are very supportive. I perhaps should take annual leave instead of being off sick.

OP posts:
LorelaiVictoriaGilmore · 16/07/2018 21:41

Ask your work. My work have always been happy for sickness absence meetings to be done via phone while on sick leave.

mineofuselessinformation · 16/07/2018 21:50

No, don't take it as annual leave - why should you?
Just tell work you're going to stay somewhere else to help your recovery (if you must say anything at all) and that you are contactable on xyz email address.
Titty has a point about OH appointments but they shouldn't be sprung on you - and you have every right to request they are at your home and not at work if that is best for you.

tass1960 · 16/07/2018 21:51

My husband works for a council in Scotland. He had a stroke last year and was off work for 8 months. We had regular meetings with his HR team and they were more than happy for him to go on holiday during this time without using annual leave although he would have been happy enough to do so. He was unable to work but was able to go on holiday and it did him the world of good.

My38274thNameChange · 16/07/2018 22:17

Employment lawyer here.

There’s nothing wrong with your idea per se, but I’d suggest being up front with your employer about it. If they call you to check in on you and get an international dial tone it will raise some very difficult questions!

The risk is if you go away and try to cover it up or aren’t honest about it, your employer may well be entitled to reasonably believe that your sickness absence was fraudulent in order to gain yourself a week of extra holiday if they did find out.

Anti depressants usually take 2-3 weeks to kick in.

Check your sickness absence policy to see what you’re obliged to do before you make any decisions.

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