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Original poster

I can't believe what I've just heard!

62 replies

thebecster · 12/12/2006 14:30

I've just got back from maternity leave, two months ago. My colleague is going on sabbatical soon. I didn't link the two things in my mind at all until just now.

She was talking on the phone to a client, speaking a language that she always forgets that I can understand and she said...
... that she is going on sabbatical because 'unlike some people she hasn't taken maternity leave', so she approached the boss and pointed out to him that 'unlike some people' she hasn't had children but she shouldn't be discriminated against (her words to the client. Well, a translation of her words). So he relented and gave her a paid sabbatical instead. Because I had all that 'time off', so now she wants time off too (again, her words). Now, I totally support her decision to take a sabbatical and think it can be a positive thing. I just think that being jealous of my maternity is a really weird trigger???

OP posts:
meowmix · 12/12/2006 14:34

at my old company they offered sabbaticals and maternity leave - but you couldn't have a sabbatical if you'd had maternity leave, but you could if it was the other way around... hmmm...

justaphase · 12/12/2006 14:46

a paid sabatical????

did your company pay you during the maternity leave?

Original poster
thebecster · 12/12/2006 14:48

Their maternity policy isn't too bad, I was paid 100% salary for the first 6 weeks, 70% for 12 more weeks, then SMP for the rest. I was off for 6 months.

OP posts:
edam · 12/12/2006 14:54

She's a weirdo. Ask her if she'd like to babysit sometime and find out how hard it is looking after children.

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 12/12/2006 14:57

i can see her point

piglit · 12/12/2006 14:57

That's just weird. I wonder if your colleague will spend her six months off a)in chronic discomfort b)unable to sit down for a week or so c)with leaky boobs d) covered in sick and poo and e) with no sleep.

Original poster
thebecster · 12/12/2006 15:01

No, she's spending it on a yacht sailing around the Whitsunday Islands off Australia... Seriously, that's what she's doing!

OP posts:
fizzbuzz · 12/12/2006 15:01

Lot of people are very insistent that they are entitled to stuff that people who have children get.
In fact I think there is some horrid website/club thing for them.

Had stand up argument with colleague at work who is a right twat about this. He backed down when I pointed out that my children would be supporting him through his old age.

Basically this attitude is quite common and I think it stinks. Put a drawing pin on her chair and watch her squeal the word sabbatical when she sits on it!

piglit · 12/12/2006 15:02

lol @ fizzbuzz

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 12/12/2006 15:02

well fair enough I think lots of places are offering sabbaticals now

I don't think they can deny the other staff one though so you should be able to get one to at some convenient point

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 12/12/2006 15:03

Some people cannot see themselves other than by copmarison or competition to others. There's no link between her sabbatical and your maternity leave, but she saw it as a tool to persuade the vboss to guve her sabbatical leave. Or, perhaps, he's glad to have her out of the way for a year!

BTW, maternity leave is a legal right, sabbatical is not.

taylormama · 12/12/2006 15:03

i love colleagues who think i have been on holiday for 6 months - i bloody wish. Work is more relaxing ... your colleague clearly misunderstands what maternity leave is ... why did your boss feel compelled to grant her the leave - who will do her work etc when she is away? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 12/12/2006 15:05

Well exactly! He gets to recruit new blood - it's very difficult to fire someone and replace them.

justaphase · 12/12/2006 15:08

I have to say you work for a very generous company (and I am not refering to their maternity policy).

I do not agree with your coleague but I can see how she justifies this to herself.

If I was her boss however I would not give her paid leave. Unpaid - perhaps - if I thought she deserved it, but paid is a joke.

GlennCloseAsCruellaDeVille · 12/12/2006 15:13

but if one person doing a similar job is offered a sabbatical then i think a case could be made for also being granted one..equality in the work place

Original poster
thebecster · 12/12/2006 15:25

I'm not questioning her right to a sabbatical (although, as PrettyCandles says, maternity is a legal right whereas the sabbatical isn't). I didn't give it a second thought until I overheard her phonecall. The thing that I think is weird is that she was bumbling along quite happily without one until she saw me going off for my 6 month 'break' and got jealous and HAD to have the 'same thing' I'd just had. Except without the baby. I think that's very odd...?

OP posts:
fizzbuzz · 12/12/2006 15:31

Perhaps she should spend her sabbatical getting up 3 times a night and massaging vomit into all her clothes.

justaphase · 12/12/2006 15:31

oh well, having a baby is much better than sailing around Australia anyway

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 12/12/2006 15:32

Sabbatical is unpaid, isn't it? Your job is kept open for you and you retain continuity of service WRT seniority and pension, but there are no other perks, I thought.

fizzbuzz · 12/12/2006 15:34

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

PrettyCandlesAndTinselToo · 12/12/2006 15:36

What will she keep from her sabbatical? Memories and photos - oh, and maybe skin cancer. Whereas you will have your family renewing and creating memories for the rest of your lives.

PortAndLemonaid · 12/12/2006 15:39

I would, however, feel very very tempted to talk on the phone in that same language to a "friend" of yours (even if you have to call the speaking clock) about how 'some people' at work apparently regard maternity leave as the same as a sabbatical and what a bizarre attitude that is...

fizzbuzz · 12/12/2006 15:50

Well said P&L

UnquietDad · 12/12/2006 15:55

do you mean
this one fizzbuzz?

or this one?

or this one 'ere?

or this one even?

or this spite-filled blog?

Blimey, there are a lot of them, aren't there?? The irony is that it's only since becoming a dad that I've even been aware that there might be such things/places/people.

Rapidly becoming aware that some people feel about children the way I feel about dogs. The difference is, of course, that they weren't dogs once.

Original poster
thebecster · 12/12/2006 15:56

P&L, I like that idea! But PrettyCandles is right, I do feel sorry for her if she thinks that my maternity leave was all about skiving off work for a bit, when actually it was just incidental to the life-changing soul-enhancing wonder of motherhood.

OP posts:
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