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Original poster

will he be fired?

64 replies

TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 16:25

My partner has recently started a new job (today is end of 3rd week). He works as a support worker(?), with adults that have learning difficulties (autism etc). As far as I know up to know they have been happy with his work but last night there was an incident where he raised his voice with a service user. He did because growing up that was what happened when his parents were assertive to him. They raised their voices. I know not brilliant as you can be assertive without upping your volume. But even worse is that he is deaf in one ear and sometimes talks louder than he thinks. At home I do have to say he is shouting because he doesn't realise how loud he is. Unfortunately I think that is what happened last night as apparently he was told he shouldn't have shouted. Today he was phoned to say he is on paid suspension while they investigate. It apparently could even have him ending up in prison. All because he doesn't know how loud he can be. I am scared he will go to prison for this. Or that he will lose his job and end up back on Job seekers. I know that the service user should have to have that happen but it wasn't malicious or because of loosing his temper. How bad will this be?

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TattieHowkerz · 27/11/2015 18:12

Has he said what he was talking very loudly and assertively/shouting about? If he was trying to reassure the person, or trying to control/tell them off would have some bearing. Do you think he is being honest with himself/you? The story is odd.

DrGoogleWillSeeYouNow · 27/11/2015 18:19

If it was that abusive for that long then why didn't another member of staff call through the door

If he's as hard of hearing as you say, and was already shouting, then maybe another member of staff was shouting through the door and he didn't hear it over his own voice.

His whole story sounds like BS to me. He, or you, or both of you are drip feeding like crazy.

RunRabbitRunRabbit · 27/11/2015 18:22

What were the words he was saying too loudly?

My Auntie speaks far too loudly sometimes due to deafness but the shouting is always along the lines of "would you like another cup of tea?" "do you still like Eccles cakes?" "have you seen Marjorie's new hairstyle?". It would be hard to interpret it as abuse, even though damn loud.

Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 18:23

No he hasnt said. What he was saying. I do believe he is being honest with me. I have probably garbled it a bit.
I am wondering if it is to do with their AQA report. When he got the job I googled the place and the report wasn't awful but wasn't brilliant either. High staff turnover and staff lacking training was mentioned if I recall.
Am I naive for hoping that they are overreacting because of this report?

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LIZS · 27/11/2015 18:23

I'm surprised they've bothered with a disciplinary and can only assume the service user, or their carer, has made a formal complaint. They could just let him go with little notice, regardless of the outcome of any investigation. Has he had training in appropriate methods of working with vulnerable people? Has he worked in this field before?

lunar1 · 27/11/2015 18:25

I think it will have as much to do with what he was saying as how loud he is. But if he is not able to regulate the volume of his voice and needs prompting to lower it then it's really not the right job. If he's working with vulnerable people it doesn't sound like the right match for him.

TattieHowkerz · 27/11/2015 18:29

Yes you are naive.

Would it be better of they thought it was ever OK to shout at vulnerable adults?

Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 18:29

Oh god! Please say I am not drip feeding- I don't want to be one of those. But I don't want to say too much as I am not sure what is ok for me to know.
He wouldn't lie to me.
He cant remember what he was saying but as far as he remembers he said things like (name) chair. (to tell them to sit down as you have to miss a lot of words as too many are confusing). Also the service user can be physically violent when he doesn't know you etc so partner had to say you don't hit me.

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Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 18:37

He hasn't worked in this area before but does have experience with high functioning autism due to our dc.
Apparently you need pbs training to work with several of the users and he thinks that user is one of them but he hasn't had that training yet. He has had basic induction which is apparently not finished as they are interspersing that with work hours. Apparently they very short staffed at the moment and they needed someone for this user so partner volunteered as the person he was supposed to be supporting wasn't interested.

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Waltermittythesequel · 27/11/2015 18:40

Well, which is it?

His hearing or his trying to be assertive?

Because if it was accidental due to his hearing surely it wouldn't only have happened in a stressful situation where the door was jammed?

And, if it was accidental due to his hearing, what does his childhood have to do with anything?!

Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 18:50

Because when he tries to be assertive he raises his voice a notch, not a lot but a little due to his father doing it growing up. When he raises his voice a notch like (not just to be assertive) then he frequently goes a lot louder than he means to. I tell him and he lowers his voice. I know I am garbling it, sorry.
He's just said the service user is difficult to work with. They were screaming. Another user outside was shouting at that user to stop screaming. He thinks that user is the one that hit the door and jammed the lock. When they (staff) heard the bang they came immediately. (apparently service user in room can get very irritated and screams a lot also there is the obvious issue of partner being new which is not helpful as that is difficult for the users.)

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GingerIvy · 27/11/2015 18:54

So he was working with someone that he didn't have the training to be working with, and that person was screaming, but your DH has a hearing problem so was shouting back at him?

Sorry, it does sound like there is more to this. And why would he "volunteer" to work with someone that he is not trained to deal with? (and why would his work then let him do so?) This makes no sense.

Waltermittythesequel · 27/11/2015 19:00

I'm sorry, OP it just isn't adding up for me.

But I don't know your dp so could be wrong.

Cel982 · 27/11/2015 19:05

Oh, I think it all sounds very possible to be honest, I've worked in care environments which are frequently understaffed and people sometimes are put in situations for which they're not adequately trained.

OP, realistically you're going to have to wait for somebody to contact him - it's difficult for anyone here to say how things are likely to go. Hopefully he'll be offered a chance to explain what happened - that would only seem fair.

Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 19:07

He was not purposely shouting at the user. He believed his voice was raised a notch.(on a scale of 0-10 with 4 being normal volume his raised voice is 5, an acceptable level but slightly louder than the norm). Apparently they are very short staffed and they were looking for someone to help with this guy so he volunteered to gain experience.
As to why they let him I don't know.
If there's more to it then I don't know it and I honestly don't think partner would lie to me.

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GingerIvy · 27/11/2015 19:11

The problem is that those care environments that I've seen that were understaffed and slack with the rules were also turning a blind eye to things like that. In other words, they weren't about to write up someone for being with a patient that they were inappropriately told to deal with. It would have been a verbal hush up and move on. If it came to light, they'd have a story ready. There wouldn't have been an immediate suspension and investigation into it unless there was a serious cock up.

The fact that it was jumped on so abruptly and with suspension implies a serious problem, which I would expect to be more than shouting (although shouting is not good and should be immediately and seriously addressed).

GingerIvy · 27/11/2015 19:12

I think you're going to go around in circles until you know the details OP. This is rather pointless speculation anyway.

justignorethecats · 27/11/2015 19:16

Many support workers are on poor pay, have to deal with very difficult and sometimes frightening situations, and with little training. I just wanted to post in support of you, OP. I have a relative with autism who shouts terribly, especially when nervous. I can see why someone might shout back.

Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 19:17

I was just focusing on him saying prison and couldn't believe it would happen over an overly loud voice.
I didn't know that they hadn't mentioned it and it was just him mentioning something from a course. Even knowing that he didn't intentionally get so loud I can understand an internal investigation and am glad of it as if it was my dc then I would want to know that they are being responsible about my dc care.

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Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 19:21

This investigation should prove he was not deliberately abusive, that he just didn't realise to modulate his voice.
Its a shame because he was really enjoying working there.

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Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 19:24

Thanks everyone especially justifnorthecats.

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Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 19:25

*justignorethecats

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bellybuttonfluffy · 27/11/2015 20:04

I do sympathise for his situation. Support workers have an incredible difficult job, but they have to have patience and keep calm in difficult situations. Service users shout for a variety of reasons, but people caring for those must rise above it and keep their cool.
I hope your DP's employer does a fair investigation and takes into account his hearing impairment. I hope he doesn't lose his job over this but it is certainly something he has to learn from as it is completely unacceptable to be shouting at those he should be caring for.

Kelsoooo · 27/11/2015 20:31

If I spoke to my SU like that "X.Chair" I'd be in trouble . They're human beings, these service users. Not dogs.

Original poster
TryingToBeMe · 27/11/2015 21:02

Kelsoooo its because you have to cut out all excess words. Saying x sit down on the chair please will confuse them. Saying sit they might sit on the floor. So you bring their attention to the chair. Our daughter is the same way but not as bad. You say name to get attention then cut out excess words.

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