Back to work - JAN 2007 - support thread

[iPodForLifeNotJustForChristmas]

Hidyho!

I'm back to work in Jan07 after 1year off. Am starting to panic a bit - Anyone else??!! Tought a kindof antenatalthread rip-off might steady the nerves!

Here's me:

ipod -
Occupational Therapist in Rehabilitation Team
Plymouth
1year off
DS 21months old, Single
Working 3 days a week

im worried about that too xmasstocking. im back into my clothes that i wore before i had ds but i just feel huge, ive still got a bit of a tummy but im not making it any better as im eating more comfort foods now to help me feel better about going back to work.
Also, ive got a holiday booked for feb to new york and the day i go back im going to have to ask for annual leave, not sure that will look good but its been booked since i found out i was pg

I wish I had a workplace nursery - the one I've chosen is near hom and the gym so I can keep going before i pick up DS. Sounds mad I know, but it is really important to me to keep going. My first return to work after mat leave was a disater - probably because I was on my own and once I got home from work I couldn't leave the house till I was going to work again the next day. Weekend were the same. But this time, DS and I are living with my parents and grandparents so there is always someone to talk to or to leave him with to get some space!

Just need to remember I'm not superwoman!!!

Ipod - thanks for the confidence boost. If I was staying at home, I don't think my size would bother me as there are some good things about it (I have got the cleavage I have always wanted ) - I love going to the gym but I am really struggling to do it and it will be even harder when I go back to work as DH works away a lot during the week and I have no family local so there is no-one to leave DS with - both me and DH want to go at the weekends so by the time we have both gone, most of the day has passed! The only bonus of gym membership atm is that they allow you to take children in to the ppol during the afternoon so me and DS go swimming twice a week.

Woke up at 7.45 this morning - I know we keep going back to this subject but how on earth are we going to get up at 6????

Ooh, busy thread! to Xmasstocking ? did?t realise you are a personnel person, adn I'm sure your lot are lots nicer and everything than ours are (gasps with relief that I didn?t say anything really nasty about ours!)

Things I am dreading about going back are the rush and faff of getting out of the house in the morning, and hardly getting any evening with DS on work days (my job is 20 miles from home, and a rotational placement, so no point in moving any closer to it). Oh, and I don?t think my brain is working any more either. There is a great thread around somewhere with tips for being more organised at work to fake that whole infallibility thing - lists, plans etc and no more winging it seems to be the way of things to come. And I?m another one whose posh work clothes don?t fit. I?m only 6lbs heavier, but it seems to have translated to between one and two clothes sizes, depending on the style. And my feet have grown a shoe size!

Quite envious of those who can?t get up in tne mornings btw ? 6am is a good sleep for us (with wakings at 11.30 and 3.30 on a good night, every hour and a half on a bad night like last night). DS thinks sleep is just an nasty rumour and can?t quite understand why his legs get shaky and his eyes need rubbing every evening. It really annoys him

Bless him - mine fights going to bed but he loves having his teeth brushed so i lure him into bed with a promise of brushing his teeth and a video and I just brush the teeth and say"snuggle down" and he does pretend snores, so I leg it and leave the room in darkness!!!

Maybe we need a competition where for a week we compete to be the earliest poster and at the end of the week the winner gets nominated to ring everyone else each morning to wake them up!!!

hi floating, i dont think they would go for it, the morning is quite busy, it seems most people have accidents on the way to work/school etc so we are normally running around. plus there are others in my boat and they dont seem to be helpfull to them. when i was pregnant they expected me to push trolleys around the xray room(with people laying on them)i refused but they still kept me working in A&E.

ipod, have you had a work life balance team ring you up? they havnt left me alone while i've been on mat leave, they ring me every couple of weeks to check everythings going ok and im still going back!!! which to be honest i wouldnt if my maternity pay was still coming in. i wish we had the 9 month thing that people will be getting from april...

Worley - I work for the NHS (in an office job though) and I have never heard of a work-life balance team - I am impressed!! However, I do think ringing you constantly whilst you are on maternity leave is a bit much.

im in suffolk, but my hospitla is norfolk, so im not sure if they cover east anglia then?

they sent me flowers after i had ds2 and have sent me lots of info on all registered childminders and nurseries near me and sorted out my busybees childcare vouchers, they are even sorting out my wftc, as they have managed to overpay us and want it all back now!!

they seem nice enough, i could have said no i didnt want them to contatc me, but i decided they could come in usefull.

i had that when I was in Hereford on my matleave - they even had monthly meetings for pregnant, matleave and newly returned staff!!!

Am working in new Devon PCT now - just rangg up to see where my offer letter is and personel said "we are really busy you know - might get it done for the end of the week.." hmmmmm, helpful! I need it urgently to get to the benefit office and becom officially off benefits!!!!!!!!!!!

i've had to chase up my superintendent,r.e which days they need me to work etc and to check i can store expressed milk in the fridge etc. i'll get some stick for that when i go back i know!! i just got my forms to retun to personell this morning, i have to get them by the end of the month or i dont get paid at the end of january.

Hi folks. Just joining this thread and I haven't had chance to read through all your posts so I'm sorry if this has been discussed before:

When you people wrote to tell your managers when you planned to return, did you get a reply and how long did it take? I wrote over two weeks ago, sent digitally and in hard copy, and copied it to Personnel. As well as giving them a date, I also asked about working from home and a phased return to work and requested a meeting. Nobody has bothered to even acknowledge my e-mail let alone reply to my letter. And I have had no contact from my immediate line manager since I went off on maternity leave.

I was already feeling pretty bad about going back to work full time and now I feel like telling them to stuff it. If I didn't have to pay back some of my maternity pay I don't think I would go back.

So sorry to introduce myself with a rant, but I'd be interested to know if this is usual or whether my organisation is particularly cr*p - I suspect the latter TBH.

Hi Twinkle - they should have acknowledged your letter and arranged the requested meeting by now - that is terrible. Do you get on with your line manager? (it sounds like maybe you don't) - cos if you did, could you approach him/her and ask for them to chase it up? Or speak to Personnel and ask them to sort it out?

Unfortunately I don't think it is unusual for managers not to contact their staff - out of sight, out of mind eh? Even my manager who is the HR manager and should know better has telephoned me only once!

Worley - the Trust where I work provides a mini fridge for staff to store expressed breast milk which I think is fairly standard practice in the NHS these days - I would ask the work-life balance team that telephone you if they could perhaps buy one for you.

Well another 'bad' day - me and DS woke up at 8am this morning - it is getting later and later so I am somehow going to have to bring it back so it is not such a shock to the poor lamb!

Thanks Xmas. I'm trying to contact Personnel. I left a message on Friday, heard nothing. Phoned yesterday - they're moving offices (third time in year!). Phoned again this morning - the person I need is out on a course, oh and all their phones are still on divert. .

Hi Twinkle, well you're not alone in having a bad personnel dept - mine knew I wanted to return p/t but didn't tell me there was a formal process I had to go through. And are now blaming me for not having found out about it (how!?). My last email was not replied to but was forwarded to someone outside their department (which horrified me as it was asking the notice I needed to give to resign and I thought it would be treated as confidential). I also feel like telling them to stuff their job! Keep trying to get them to talk to you - if they are anything like my lot you will be the one in the wrong otherwise!

oh god, its so dark and so early!!! I've been getting real strict with DS over 7:30pm bedtime, I had been letting it slip to 8/8:30d due to late waking. Hes woken at 6:15am 3 days in row now - which is great, but combined with me not sleeping till at least 1am ITS KILLING ME!!!!!!!!!!!

Still waiting for my letter offering me the job - benefits agency is going to shut down for christmas isn't it - I better not end up being overpaid, cant afford to repay that and childcare! Just hope I can get an appointment as soon as it comes.

As we are up I might do a pretend run out to work via nursery this morning - or I might just continue to mumsnet in PJ's!

Just had an e-mail from work - still no clearer about what job I am going back to but at least they have confirmed that the days I agreed with my manager before leaving and subsequently booked nursery for (Wed, Thurs & Fri) will be honoured so that is a huge relief. Not really bothered about what job it is now as I only really intend to turn up, do what I have to and come home again - funny how priorities change with children as I was always a keen, ambitious worker before!

7.30 start for me this morning so a bit better than the last 2 days!

Yay to turning up, doin what you have to and leaving!! Unfortunately that too will be my new years resolution. Which is a shame, as quite often on a friday afternoon I used to be working on after my finish time to make sure than some old dear was ready to be discharged from hospital on the saturday or sunday! I was such a sucker for the old ones!

Floating - so, its not till I go back to tell them the changes then? Well, that takes the pressure off a bit. What about the back to work grant - do you know about that?
Also, when does my income support stop? potentially might not get paid till Feb, depending on payroll dates etc - I'm stuffed if they stop it the day I start work! Suppose I better go to the dolemonkeys office

oh, btw, feel asleep watching cbeebies this morning and didn't leave the house till 9am - just in time to go to the gym!!

hmmmmm, will chill a bit - I live with my very lucky parents so I cant claim housing Benefit!

Cant believe at my last appointmnt there in the summer I was in tears saying "I'm never gonna get a job, I'm useless!" ha! I showed me!!

Need to send off my Criminal Records form - Anyone else doing one knows how long its taking at the moment?

Hi can I join in? what a great thread!

Going back to full time work end of Jan, and can so so relate to what everyone's been saying on here, esp Floating - what you said about feeling like you've been in a different world. I was saying to someone the other day that I feel like I've been in some strange parallel universe for the last 5 months - and she looked at me like I'd suddenly grown 2 heads! (she gave up her career to be a sahm).

I too got excited about my ipod, until yesterday when I discovered it won't work for some reason - boo!

Anyway, my excitement about having to wear a suit every day and bother about my appearance and use my brain again and talk to other people, as opposed to slobbing about the house in sick covered baggy clothes watching depressing daytime TV, is slightly overshadowed by severe guilt at having to leave ds who will be 6 months in a nursery from 8 - 6 mon - fri. I really have no choice in this as I can't do my job part time, it's all or nothing.

Am also stressing about leaving the house on time like everyone else - will have to do a few dummy runs. Also got the weaning issue - when to start? don't want to overload the poor lo with everything at once!

When Ds was 5months he went to nursery full time - I had started him on some puree and stuff but nothing major. Nursery said they would just keep trying him on stuff, and by the eend of the week he was scoffing french bread like a pro and finishing whole bowls of dinner and pudding!!
So I never really weaned him at all- the nursery did!

I went back full time for 6months before I moved back to Plymouth. I cant pretend it was easy but I suppose not everyone decide to chuck out the DP and ends up doing everything all alone!! The biggest problem I had was not seeing anyone from 4pm till 8am, and knowing I couldn't leave the house.

One year on, I'm living at my parents with my grandparents, and I'm never short of someone to look after DS and can have something resembling a life! - well, one night out a month!