Accused of "slandering a coworker"

[TreeHuggerMum1]

So during a routine one to one last week (Friday afternoon) after being told by my manager that my work is "outstanding" as is my time keeping, reliability etc etc and I was asked to take on extra duties (which I agreed to) and then it quickly became quite nasty and I was informed that my conduct had been brought into question, and that a colleague has informed her that I was involved in a conversation about a coworker and was "slandering" her. I am unsure exactly as to what I am supposed to have said (she wouldn't tell me) but I have been "warned" if this conduct continues it will be dealt with through disciplinary channels.
To say I am gobsmacked is an understatement. I sit next to the girl in question and am nothing but nice to her.
I asked for more information and was told there was little available to me, I was told it was a conversation in July and that I had been overheard speaking ill of someone.
This is not me and I really am appalled. I burst into tears (very professional) and was told I "had" to apologise to the coworker I have slandered and I am under no circumstances allowed to contact the person that I am supposed to have said these things too. I can't imagine saying nasty things about someone and have denied it but my boss is adamant I have done this and wouldn't hear anything to the contrary.
I have worked in this large open plan office for 6 months and too says it's uncomfortable is a joke. We are judged on what we wear, what we eat (no hot or smelly food allowed) what we say (laughing kept to a minimum etc) so I watch what I say and who I say it too because I know we are under a microscope.
It was left at that but now I am dreading returning to work tomorrow.
As requested I apologised and the girl told me that it wasn't actually me so as the other person and that I had been less nasty but thin other colleague had insinuated she was not sick when she was and she was hurt by this. I have apologised and said I was unaware I had said anything offensive and will be more cautious of what I say in future.
Should I suck it up and act as if nothing happened?
I suffer with anxiety anyway and this has really affected me. I've barely eaten or slept since Friday afternoon and now Monday morning is looming and I am so stressed out. Help!

How can you apologise about anything when you do not know what you were supposed to have said, and as such - aren't able to defend yourself?

If you didn't say anything and are confident of that, then just go about your day to day business, whilst looking for other jobs.

Can you not ask her to mention to your manager that it wasn't actually you?

is this an official warning ie written? what happened to the other colleague that was more nasty than you?

The other colleague is on leave and will be dealt with when she returns.
No this was not official - merely a "quiet word" I believe the term is.
The notes of the meeting will be written up (as are all one to ones) so I know this will be one file though and that concerns me deeply.

So you've been told to apologise for something someone else did? Really? I'd be back to that manager about this with a witness. I'd take the whole thing much further personally and demand an offical aology from the manager. How utterly unprofessional.

I have said to my boss I am unaware of saying anything intentionally malicious and perhaps something has been taken out of context. She says that's irrelevant.
We have an awful woman in our office, a real busy body, never married, never had children, close to retirement and loves to get involved in everyone's life and I think it may be her who has (purposefully??) taken something out of context but it's too late now.
I am so upset by this whole thing.

How did the girl in question know that she had been "spoken ill about" - did the overhearing colleague tell her? nice! Sounds like the overhearing colleague is a troublemaker :(

And what about the other person in this conversation, have they been warned that they too could face disciplinary action and been told to apologise to the girl in question?

This all sounds a bit underhanded and unpleasant, and if I were you I'd seriously start looking for another job - I can't stand that sort of place, where all this underhand backstabbery goes on. :(

My boss has said that people in our office have told her, that she also informed her manager and that that manager in turn reported it to my manager!

Sorry, got sidetracked midway through my post and ended up xposting with you.

If there's an identified troublemaker in the office, I'd definitely consider finding somewhere else to work - if they know she's trouble but still let her create more trouble, then that's hopeless and you'll never be treated fairly.

Request another meeting, with the girl who was 'slandered' in attendance. And make sure the notes of that meeting are written up and checked by you, before they are put on your file.

When I joined 6 months ago I was shocked to find out that 3 of us had started within 3 weeks of each other due to the high turnover of staff.

Bet you're not quite so shocked now, are you - now the reason's becoming clear! Bunch of gossipy, tittle-tattling backstabbers.

The only choices you have are leave or don't talk to anyone about anything other than strict work-related issues ever again.

I have been told that another meeting is pencilled in for in 3 weeks times "if" the girl who has been slandered "feels it's necessary".

What about how I chuffing feel? Lol.

Sounds fishy. Are they following guidelines here? I mean, I'm SURE they're allowed to recount what was allegedly said?

Are you in a union?

You should request another meeting with the manager to lodge a complaint about the fact that you've been slandered in that you've been accused of saying something which you haven't said.

How shifty for someone who is ill to be spoken about like this.

A union is not an option. I can't go into details without outing myself completely which would no doubt cause even bigger problems, but a union is out.

Well, it sounds like a shitty workplace and a terrible situation not of your making. Try contacting ACAS.

However, you've lost a bit of my sympathy by saying this other woman 'never married, never had children'. What's that got to do with anything?

OP, I can sympathise because something similar happened to me earlier this year.

I was told I had talked negatively about another member of staff by my line manager even though I was positive I hadn't. In actual fact th day it as alleged to have happened I was on annual leave!

My department is highly dysfunctional anyway and I have learnt now to talk about nothing but work with my colleagues and pleasantries such as the weather etc so nothing I can say can be brought into question.

I just mean that she seems to take a lot more interest (too much IMO) in the goings on of other people lives and I perhaps wrongly assumed that if she had married and had children she would have less time for this as she would be concentrating on her own life and not mine! I guess I'm venting and jumping to conclusions which is wrong too but doesnt excuse her behaviour.
There are plenty of busy bodies that are married with children and I accept that too lol

What did you do 00 Sallycinnamum?

What's "never married, never had children, close to retirement" got to do with anything!?!

I just mean that she seems to take a lot more interest (too much IMO) in the goings on of other people lives and I perhaps wrongly assumed that if she had married and had children she would have less time for this as she would be concentrating on her own life and not mine! I guess I'm venting and jumping to conclusions which is wrong too but doesnt excuse her behaviour.
There are plenty of busy bodies that are married with children and I accept that too lol