alternatives to returning to work??

[happymum85]

My DD is currently 7 and a half months old. I've been on ML since June last year and am due to return in June this year. I cannot tell you how much I am dreading it! I love looking after my baby and can't imagine leaving her with someone else while i go back to a job i do purely for the money (and not very much of it either!). Secretly I've been telling myself right throughout my maternity leave that i won't be going back, that we can survive without my income but hadn't spoken these words to DH. So last night we had "the talk". I was so nervous which is absurd as we talk openly about everything, but for some reason i was scared he would think i was trying to get out of doing any work (cos being at home with a baby all day is plain sailing as you all know ) So i asked if he thought we'd be able to manage without me returning to work and he said no and explained that we needed my income to sustain our current standard of living as well as meet our mortgage repayments. My heart sank. Now what?! He did suggest perhaps becoming a childminder and then i could stay at home and earn money. but i've only just got the hang of taking care of one child. i am NOT ready to throw another few into the equation. so i've been racking my brains all day trying to come up with ways of earning money from home.

I guess after all that I'm asking if anyone has any ideas, or, even better, success stories, of how to earn an income while taking care of my daughter myself?

Sorry for the long speel - this is my first post. i aim to get better at it, i promise!

Hi

This is my first post too :-) just to say that I'm in the very same situation, DH wouldn't mind me staying home but I know we would be short of money as I used to earn more than him. I don't like my job but at least it pays well so I could go back part time (if they agree!) I am looking for another job but I am not sure what to do. Anything which would be PT, local and with regular hours simply doesn't pay enough.
I've looked at getting a franchise so I could choose my hours but I doubt it would be worth it and it is likely to involve working loads to build up the business. Childminding doesn't appeal either, and I think they require you to have a big house. Another option is to look at jobs you can do from home - one of my friend does translations from home. Sorry I havemt got many suggestions, but I wanted to let you know you aren't alone not wanting to leave your DC with strangers. Best of luck

thanks cupcake addict. i've looked into franchises too as i've always wanted to run my own business but i agree that the startup period would mean working all hours. it is comforting to know that there is someone else in the same position as me. hopefully we will both find a solution. problem is being a mum is just the best job in the world! thank you for posting

Hi 2madboys
thank you for your suggestion! I just had a look at the website and it def seems interesting as it's something i haven't heard of before and so hopefully it'd be new to others round here too. i'd thought of going down the avon route but worried that perhaps i wouldn't be able to make enough money from it. do you find that you are able to make a decent income from your work with phoenix trading? how do you go about selling the products - do you throw parties, go door-to-door?

PS. Also found it easy to sell - I'm def not a sales person, but everyone needs cards, usually over and over again!

sounds really good. i actually have a real love for all things stationery. i tend to get quite excited about cards etc! so i think i could be quite good at selling this stuff. more so than avon products. i'd be rubbish at giving people makeovers! i'm curious how you go about doing parties and fairs? how do u arrange these, what do u do at the parties etc? i'm not very confident when it comes to speaking in front of groups of people and putting myself out there like that. however, i'm much better one-on-one. hope u don't mind all the questions but it's great to have someone to ask!

Phoenix is brilliant - I did it for years while the dcs were young, and made good money (have since gone back to work). Great fun and really easy to get started.

2madboys, naughty naughty, you'll get a rap on the knuckles for linking like that........

The fairs have mostly been word of mouth - my dss school and friends, etc. Parties I've got the same way - friends and friends of friends. Don't really need to do a speech at parties - I wouldn't be doing it if that was the case! I just chat to people as they arrive, give them catalogues and explain prices etc. All very low key and sociable. Basically, getting paid to meet nice people drink wine, eat cake and socialise!

sounds like a wonderful way to make money. whether it's a realistic alternative to going back to work i'll have to see but thanks so much for sharing!

I feel sad for you Happymum but I'm sure there is a solution for you out there.

Why don't you put together a budget and go through all your outgoings to see where you can save money (i.e. change energy providers, downgrade on brands at the supermarket, etc.) then discuss it with your DH.

We are very lucky in the fact that we live in a very affluent area. Over the last couple of years, I have rediscovered charity shops and Freecycle. It is AMAZING! I save an absolute fortune and constantly find all sorts of weird and wonderful things. I have more clothes than ever and I spend a fraction of what I used to. I just wish I'd made the discovery when I was single and struggling to pay the mortgage!

If you can also earn some pennies by doing some work on the side I am sure you will manage. Phoenix Cards sounds good. Maybe you could take in some ironing (bit dull I know) but fairly easy to fit in around a baby.

Good luck. Let us know how you get on.

hi happymum85, cupcake, and everyone else, I run my own business working for Usborne Childrens Books. It is really flexible and can either be done on its own or alongside other jobs. I am really passionate about books and reading and simply love advising parents, teachers and friends what books might suit a particular child. I do a mixture of parties, events and school events and that works really well for me. I don't have a large network but I am known locally as the Usborne book lady and get people contacting me. The joining fee is really small at £38 for over £130 of books and stationery. You get the chance to earn back the joining fee as an incentive and for March to also get the box set of 15 Very 1st reading books worth £75. If you have further q's do post!

hi sam
i'd looked into Usborne books! it looks good. i too love reading and am encouraging my DD by reading to her every day - i really want to get her passionate about books. however, i'm not sure i have the right kind of personality for that particular job. i am terrible when it comes to speaking in front of a group of people. i get ridiculously nervous and shaky and tongue-tied (cue frightening university presentation flashbacks!) Thanks for posting though. Maybe it'll be a solution for someone else here

I'm probably the world's worst party planner - I don't do a speech or ice breakers. I just let everyone have a cup of coffee in peace and look at the books and catalogues!! Obviously I answer any questions guests might have or ideas, but I don't like the idea of hassling everyone!

Hi A friend of mine used to sell Phoenix cards. As we all had young children I used to hold parties on a Sat afternoon and everyone brought their children. They were really nice get togethers.

...he said no and explained that we needed my income to sustain our current standard of living as well as meet our mortgage repayments.

Did you not realise this before you talked to him, or do you think you can manage on one income? I'm a bit surprised you have been on maternity leave since last summer and don't know whether you can manage without your income or not - surely if you were planning on living on his income you should have been saving your salary to demonstrate that it's possible.

Get the feeling you just have to bite the bullet and go back. Making good childcare arrangements should help you come terms with it.

OP have you looked into Tax Credits. If your DH is on a low income, he could claim.

I think you need a much better case to put to your dh - you make it sound like he's your dad or something, pronouncing on what you can and can't afford! Take control, look at your household income and outgoings and see for yourself if you can economise. One advantage of not workign is that you have more time to search out bargains, sell things on ebay, cook from scratch etc etc. Plus, what childcare are you planning to use? How much net income will you actually have once you go back to work?

Perhaps the reduction in your standard of living might that your dh is wanting to avoid might enable you to stay at home at least for a year or two. If you were to cut back drastically would you still be able to afford the mortgage and essential bills? If so, then it may be possible for you to stay at home. It may also be a case of reviewing your priorities as a family now that you have a baby.

Just a thought and lots of 'maybes' because I don't know much about your situation.

bodencustomer i think you have hit the nail on the head - we would be able to pay our bills, but it would mean cutting back on what we spend and also not saving. it is really just a difference of opinion between me and DH as we have different ideas of what is comfortable. He wants to be able to save a set amount of money every month, while I am happy that we have a decent amount of money in savings and can afford to live a few years spending what we earn (paying bills, clothes, etc.).
more discussion needed i think. i just don't like to come across as the "spoiled" one who wants him to go out to work while i stay home. as i type this i know it sounds ridiculous!!! but i grew up with money and it's always something i've felt uncomfortable about. now that we're making it on our own i want to respect DH's desire to save for our future and give us a good standard of living.

I think a much franker discussion about how you view your family priorities is in order here. (never ceases to amaze me how couples can avoid talking about really big and fundamental things!)

Certainly, giving up work will damage your long term earning potential as well as your immediate income level - and that's something you should give serious consideration - but it really depends on how important material comfort is to you personally and as a family, compared with having more time at home while your children are small. Frankly most families have less spare cash for savings while they are supporting their children - an element of belt tightening is inevitable. But maybe you are a bit unrealistic about the sacrifice that will be needed?

OP, don't forget to offset your childcare costs against your wages. When I went back I was only making about £5 after childcare, petrol etc...

Personally I found the THOUGHT of returning to work much more scary than the reality. Plus we are in hard times. If you have a reasonable job, and potential pension, it is madness to walk away. It is VERY hard to get it back afterwards.